The Escort
by Lis123
Summary: Bella is a lonely, inexperienced girl who calls an Escort service wanting to know what it's like to have a boyfriend. Edward Cullen is the Escort. all human
1. The birthday gift

**BPOV **

Today is my twenty fourth birthday and what am I doing? Dancing the night away in some club with a hot guy? No. Leaving my friend's at a club to head home to be with my man? No. Try sitting in my apartment all alone.

I sat on the couch in the living room nervously staring at the phone that lay on the table across from me, as it silently mocked me. Taking a deep breath I picked the phone up with shaky hands, letting my hesitant fingers punch in the numbers that I came to know so well. This was my fourth attempt trying to make a successful call. Every time I heard someone answer I would lose my nerve and throw my phone down in embarrassment and shame.

I was determined to touch base this time. I gave myself a little pep talk as I could heard the phone begin to ring, knowing any second someone would pick up.

**Many people do it. **

**It's not a big deal, just do it and get it over with.**

My heart pounded in my chest as I heard the secretary answer.

"Escort services, how can I help you?"

* * *

Your probably wondering why a twenty four year old girl would need to call an escort service, I guess I should start from the beginning. My name is Bella Swan and I never been lucky with guys. I was a very shy girl growing up, hell, I'm still pretty shy. I liked to say I changed over the years, learned from my lessons but that would be a lie. You'll never meet anyone more closed off than me.

Growing up I was always the more mature girl in school, more mature than anyone else my age. I was what you would call a role model. The girl, who never got in trouble, always did what was told, well for the most part, I am human after all. I made good grades, teachers often used me as an example of what the other students should be aiming to become. Yup, I guess it's safe to say I was a teacher's pet.

There was just one area I failed in, boys. I was a strong willed girl, alright I was stubborn, I am not afraid to admit it. Some of the things girls did to catch a guy's attention were ridiculous and I had too much pride and self-respect to do them.

The other reason I unsuccessful with guys was that I was picky. I didn't want to date a guy I had no attraction to what so ever, what would be the point? There weren't many boys I found attractive and the ones I did find attractive were either already taken or uninterested.

Last, was of course my shyness, I didn't know how to open up to guys. It was just weird, guys were one species and girls were another. I didn't know how to relate.

Not to mention, now a days all that guys care about was getting into a girls pants. There were no genuine guys anymore. No one wanted a girlfriend, just a fuck buddy. At least that's what my friends told me according to their dating history.

That was the moment I knew I was screwed, if my friends who were out going and attractive couldn't get a man in the world of today, how was a shy inexperienced girl like me going to?

So, that's how I became the pathetic girl I am, calling an escort service, willing to pay a professional to act interested in me.

* * *

I paced the living room nervously as I waited for Mr. Cullen's arrival, Mr. Edward Cullen to be exact. Though I was forewarned he didn't like to be called that, too personal.

I started to feel dizzy from all my pacing. I took a seat on my couch trying to calm my anxiety, while silently going over everything Mr. Cullen's secretary informed me on about him before his arrival.

_The Rules:_

_No first names._

_No questions about his personal life._

_No calls to his personal phone, work phone only._

_Don't get attached._

I had to laugh at the last one. Thinking how desperate women must be to first pay for sex and then get attached to the person their paying. Though now I would be considered desperate like the rest.

**Shit, I don't even know what this guy looks like.**

**What if I'm not even attracted to him? **

**That would be awkward.**

I was deep in thought when there was a knock on the door. I jumped up from the couch in surprise.

**That was quick.**

I slowly made my way over taking a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves.

**It's now or never.**

I gripped the handle slowly turning it, before I bravely opened the door. Once I opened the door fully, I swear my mouth dropped to the ground. There standing on the other side was the most beautiful man I had ever seen. My breath caught in my chest. He was a tall, lightly tanned, well-built man with rich butterscotch eyes and dark brown hair with red tint. Not to mention he had the sexist smirk ever.

**Clearly there must be some mistake; this can't be the escort could it? **

**He looks like a freaking model.**

I started to feel out of place as I continued to look him over. I definitely wouldn't have a chance in hell with a guy like him in real life. Here I was this silly plain Jane girl next to a God.

After a few minutes passed he finally spoke.

"Hello, I'm Mr. Cullen, you must be Bella Swan?"

I gulped hard, suddenly feeling my nervousness come back, nodding in responses at a loss of words. After a moment of regrouping I spoke.

"Yeah, ah, come in."

I watched Mr. Cullen from behind as he walked in gracefully, looking around his surroundings. After getting a good look at him from all angles I understood how girls could grow attached to him. He was irresistible, his physical appearance anyways.

Suddenly I noticed his gaze was upon me, obviously checking my appearance.

**I hoped he's not disappointed.**

**What am I talking about?**

**This is what he gets paid for, to have sex with unattractive women.**

"So, did my secretary go over my requirements/rules?" He asked ready to get down to business.

"Yes." I answered feeling a little uncomfortable.

"Good, now, I charge a thousand for sex, for anything special the cost is more."

Curious, I questioned him.

"Special?"

Mr. Cullen rolled his eyes annoyed.

"Talking, cuddling etc…"

I stood there taken back by his sudden annoyance. Wondering why something so simple like talking would bug him, than again he probably had a lot of girls who wanted to explain their reasons for needing an escort, wanting to defend their desperation and then there were probably a couple that just wanted to tell him about themselves thinking he was interested, which I guess wasn't the case, this was a job for him after all.

"That won't be a problem." I said easing him.

Mr. Cullen smirked widely.

"Good, this should go smoothly then."

I found myself tensing up as he started to walk seductively over to me. I wanted to laugh, I'm not sure if it was out of nervousness or just finding the scene in front of me humorous. It wasn't that he didn't look attractive the way he was walking over; I think it just felt so unreal for me to be the current situation I was in. I had to bite my lower lip to keep the chuckles at bay as Mr. Cullen came closer, looking like a predator ready to pounce on his prey.

"Now, tell me, what do you want?" He asked in a rough voice.

**Man, when he goes out, he goes all out.**

"Ah?" I responded feeling my cheeks heat up with color.

**Nervousness, I definitely wanted to laugh out of nervousness.**

**Though now I just feel like fainting.**

"Maybe this was a mistake." I said starting to have second thoughts.

Mr. Cullen broke out of character looking me over in utter shock. I'm sure it wasn't often he got turned down, I mean he was fine.

"Come on, we're both adults here." He voiced playfully.

When he didn't get a response he tensed up.

"You are older than twenty one correct?"

"What, yeah, I'm twenty four." I quickly answered.

Mr. Cullen grinned at this switching back to his role play.

"See, no worries, just tell me what you want and I'll try to make it happen," he said smoothly.

I thought for a minute wondering how I should word what I wanted to say.

**Do I tell him my long boring story? **

**No, he doesn't want to hear my story. **

**He just wants to know what I want so he can get it over with, take the money and go. **

**God I'm so pathetic, why did I agree to this? **

**What was I thinking calling an escort service?**

**Well, I might as well tell him want I wanted; it's what the hell he's here for.**

However, before I could respond Mr. Cullen interrupted.

"Oh and I should also mention there are certain things I don't do."

"Okay?"

I waited patiently for him to explain.

"I don't do any rough/freaky shit like, biting; scratching and I do not want it in return. Also, no toys, no oral, giving or receiving, oh and no kissing."

I looked up at Mr. Cullen shocked at his last request.

"Oh, this was a bad idea," I said feeling awkward.

Mr. Cullen looked me over confused as I handed him some money to get home.

"I'm sorry for your troubles getting here, but I won't be needing your services."

He looked at the money in his hand dumbfounded.

"I don't understand."

I blushed as I started to explain.

"Well, you see, I ah, just wanted a kiss."

Mr. Cullen eyed me strangely.

"A kiss?"

"Yeah, but since your services don't provide that..."

He stood there with his mouth partly opened.

"You called an escort service for kissing?"

"Yeah?" I said feeling stupid.

**Great, now he probably thinks I'm a loser.**

**Who am I kidding I am a loser.**

**What twenty four year old has never been kissed?**

Mr. Cullen gave me a questioning look telling me he wanted further details. I went on explaining.

"You see, I've never really been kissed, much less had a boyfriend. I just wanted to know what it was like." I confessed.

He flinched, sighing through closed eyes.

"Okay, I'll do it."

I suddenly lit up, surprised he agreed.

"But no tongue, and only for a couple of minutes." He lectured.

I quickly nodded my head in agreement.

**I get to kiss a hot ass guy, how many girls can say that? **

**Not many.**

"Where do you want to do this, here or in the bedroom?"

I stiffen at his question, feeling the weirdness of the situation coming back.

"Here!"

Mr. Cullen chuckled patting a seat next to him on the couch.

I bit my lip sitting down as he turned towards me and began to instruct.

"Relax and close your eyes."

I reluctantly did, only moments later to feel lips on mine. I gasped backing away, surprised at his speed, thinking he was going to go slow, warn me before he pressed his lips against mine so I would be ready.

Mr. Cullen pulled back noticing my response or lack thereof.

"You know for someone who wants to kiss, you sure don't act like it." He snapped, getting frustrated.

**Great, now he's annoyed with me.**

**Great job Bella, annoy the hot guy.**

I blushed feeling awkward.

"Sorry, this is new to me."

He shook his head in understanding.

"Just do what I do."

I nodded in response only to feel his lips on mine again. I instantly closed my eyes trying to relax into the kiss.

I soon found myself kissing back, moving my lips against his. I balled up my hands in my lap not sure what to do with them. I mean, I had a pretty good idea where they went but I didn't have the guts to move them. I felt Mr. Cullen sigh through the kiss.

**Oh god, he's already bored.**

I flinched feeling him take my hands in his. However, I soon relaxed as Mr. Cullen placed them around his neck. I smiled against the kiss as I felt his go to my waist, liking the feeling it gave me.

Feeling ballsy I got on my knees moving over to Mr. Cullen, taking him off guard as I straddle his lap, before deepening the kiss.

My hands travelled from his neck to his wild hair, loving the feel of it in my hands. I moaned in the kiss, tugging on his loose strands, not really knowing if Mr. Cullen was enjoying it or not, though not really caring either. I couldn't help but feel a rush of excitement run through me as I felt him tighten his grip on my waist, bringing me closer.

**I must be doing something right.**

Before I knew what I was doing I found myself backing away from his lips, letting my tongue come out and trace his soft mouth. I knew I went too far when I felt Mr. Cullen freeze in his spot. I watched as he quickly pulled away from my mouth.

"What did I say?" He complained, making me feel small.

"Sorry, I got caught in the moment."

Mr. Cullen rolled his eyes annoyed.

"Time's up."

I awkwardly got off his lap, taking my spot back on the couch as I heard him began to count the money. I sat there feeling sick to my stomach, feeling rejected all over again.

"Nice doing business with you. You know the number if you require my services again."

I nodded my head yes, as Mr. Cullen headed for the door.

"Oh and Miss. Swan, next time you do the tongue thing this ends, understand?"

I stared at the ground feeling unattractive.

"Yeah."

"Don't be embarrassed, you're not the first to make that mistake and probably won't be the last," he stated rolling his eyes.

I let out a sigh as he left.

**Never again, it's just too embarrassing and awkward.**

**He is one hell of a kisser though.**


	2. Welcome to my life

**EPOV**

"How's my week looking Kami?" I asked my secretary as I looked over my mail.

"Full sir, there's a possible new client as well, she just called today, her name is Bella Swan," she answered from her spot.

I took a seat at my desk looking over Bella Swan's information that she gave my secretary over the phone. It wasn't often I took new clients in; I already had my hands full with the ones I had, though Kami assured me this one was different, that the lady specified this was a onetime thing. I tried hard not to roll my eyes at that comment. That's what they all said at the beginning, but before I knew it I was getting call backs left and right, not that I minded, I mean I needed the money.

* * *

I guess I should start at the beginning, how I entered this sex driven job at the ripe young age of twenty five. I was a college dropout, yeah; I know what ever girl wants to hear. Anyways, I couldn't afford my pricey classes on my own, so I had to drop out. My roommate at the time, Emmett told me about some guy he once knew who did this Escort thing for a living. At first I laughed, I thought Emmett was joking; I mean, what guy wouldn't want a job involved with sleeping with beautiful girls all the time and getting paid to do it?

Yeah, I guess you could say I was pretty ignorant back then. It wasn't till I actually started to do it myself that I realized just how hard a job it was. All the pretty girls I had in my mind where actually middle age women and several even had families. Some were not very attractive, and most of them made me feel like a piece of meat. I had it in my mind that I was the one in control when really it was the other way around. It took so much mental strength to try and act attracted to every women I slept with, playing a role.

I was broke, so I was willing to do anything I had to, to survive. Not to mention, my personal life suffered as well. I went through so many girlfriends because they either couldn't deal with my job, the ones that I actually told, or they thought I was cheating on them with the constant calls I received on my phone.

Now here I was twenty seven years old and much wiser, or so I like to think. I have rules for each client of mine to respect and follow and I also make sure my job does not interfere with my personal life like it once did.

* * *

"Very Well, tell this Bella Swan I'm on my way over and make sure she is clear on the rules before I get there."

Kami nodded in acknowledgement grabbing the phone from her desk to make the call.

"Yes sir."

After checking my mail and calls I headed on my way to my house to take a quick shower and get cleaned up, picking out a nice blue suit from my closet.

Although it wasn't my ideal to be dressed up all the time, I knew my clients liked the clean cut, sophisticated look. I wanted to remain professional, wearing a certain wardrobe to work just helped make the message clear that it was all business and nothing more.

Once satisfied with my look I headed out the door in search of Bella Swan's house.

* * *

It wasn't hard to find the small house, just fifteen minutes away from my own estate. Such a discovery would usually be a no-no for me. I didn't want my clients to live close to my own residence in fear they would learn where I lived and maybe even try to pay me a visit off work hours. Though Kami my secretary seemed determined this potential client was different.

So, with a deep sigh, I closed my car door heading to the entrance way, ringing the doorbell. It wasn't long before I heard shuffling on the other side and the sound of the door creaking open. I stood back with a smile plastered to my face going into my role play as the charming, professional that could make all this woman's fantasies come true.

I was more than a little shocked when I saw Miss Swan. I was expecting a full grown woman, and instead there was a young girl who looked to be around my age.

**This can't be Bella Swan; this must be her daughter or something.**

The girl looked just as stunned to see me standing on the other side of the door. I continued to smile trying to be polite. I waited for the girl to introduce herself; however, she stayed mute, eyeing me like most of the women did when they first saw me.

I know I should have been flattered that so many women found me attractive, but all it did was made me feel unimportant, a sexy toy, nothing more. I had to keep reminding myself that there was no reason to take it to heart; it was my job after all.

After a few minutes passed I decided to speak seeing this girl was still in shock.

"Hello, I'm Mr. Cullen, you must be Bella Swan?" I asked trying to take charge of the situation.

The young girl nodded in response at a loss of words. I stood there dumbfounded I couldn't believe she was my client. After a moment of regrouping she spoke.

"Yeah, ah, come in."

I slowly made my way inside the house eyeing my surroundings. It was a cute little house, with little girly touches here and there nothing to overpowering. Once familiar with house I turned around to get to business, taking in Miss Swan's appearance in for the first time of the night.

She had long brown hair, brown eyes, an innocent looking face, thin frame and a pretty plain Jane kind of style. I found it quite amusing, most girls her age felt the need to show off their skin, show off their sex appeal, but not this girl. I still couldn't understand why she needed an escort. Though she didn't look like a model, she wasn't unattractive and she didn't seem like the type of girl to be a bitch.

"So, did my secretary go over my requirements/rules?" I asked ready to get down to business.

"Yes." She answered quickly.

I smiled glad we were on the same page.

"Good, now, I charge a thousand for sex, for anything special the cost is more," I declared wanting to make sure she was clear on my demands.

"Special?" she asked scrunching her face up in confusion.

I rolled my eyes somewhat annoyed as I went over the details I had to repeat so many times before and got so sick of saying.

"Talking, cuddling etc…"

"That won't be a problem." She announced putting me more at ease making me smirk widely.

**Good, maybe I will actually get home at a decent hour tonight.**

"Good, this should go smoothly", I voiced as I made my way over to her, closing the distance between us.

"Now, tell me, what do you want?" I asked in a husky voice.

"Ah?" she said blushing at my advances, making her look more like a little girl than an adult.

**What's with this girl?**

**Most women love my charming, seductive façade.**

"Maybe this was a mistake." She said causing me to stop in my steps.

**Are you kidding me?**

"Come on, we're both adults here." I voiced playfully, trying to reason with her.

She said nothing causing me to start to worry she wasn't as old as I once thought.

**Oh God, please don't be underage.**

"You are older than twenty one correct?" I asked in an authoritative voice.

"What, yeah, I'm twenty four" she quickly replied putting my mind at ease.

"See, no worries, just tell me what you want and I'll try to make it happen." I said smoothly.

"Oh and I should also mention there are certain things I don't do."

"Okay?"

"I don't do any rough/freaky shit like, biting; scratching and I do not want it in return. Also, no toys, no oral, giving or receiving, oh and no kissing." I stated noticing the girl's shock at my comment.

"Oh, this was a bad idea" she said looking embarrassed.

I looked over at her in confusion as she handed me some money.

"I'm sorry for your troubles getting here, but I won't be needing your services."

"I don't understand."

"Well, you see, I ah, just wanted a kiss."

**Is this girl for real?**

"A kiss?" I stated at a complete loss.

"Yeah, but since your services don't provide that..."

I stood there taken back. I never had a problem with a woman before. Never a request, desire I couldn't fill within the limits of my rules. This was a change.

"You called an escort service for kissing?"

"Yeah?" She confessed timidly.

**Don't tell me this girl has never been kissed.**

I waited for Miss Swan to explain.

"You see, I've never really been kissed, much less had a boyfriend. I just wanted to know what it was like" she admitted.

I closed my eyes letting out a sigh in frustration.

**I thought this was going to be easy.**

**Great, now I feel bad.**

"Okay, I'll do it." I said eyeing her smiled at my reply.

"But no tongue, and only for a couple of minutes." I lectured.

Miss Swan eagerly nodded her head in agreement.

"Where do you want to do this, here or in the bedroom?"

She stiffened at my question before shouting. "Here!"

I chuckled at her outburst patting a seat next to me on the couch.

Miss Swan bit her lip before slowly making her way over, sitting down next to me.

"Relax and close your eyes." I ordered seeing the stress clear on her face.

I leaned forward pressing my lips to hers, only for her to back away before the kiss even really started.

"You know for someone who wants to kiss, you sure don't act like it." I snapped, finding her inexperience frustrating, thinking of all the other things I could have been doing at that very moment.

I watched as her face flush with color.

"Sorry, this is new to me."

I shook my head in understanding realizing I was going to have to teach her.

"Just do what I do."

She nodded in response as I moved in again meeting her lips. After a minute of waiting I felt her lips press back against mine. I sighed through the kiss feeling her tense up.

**This is not what I expected.**

I moved her balled up hands to my neck as mine went to her waist, feeling her relax into the kiss, getting more into it. I froze in my spot as Miss Swan straddled my lap during the kiss.

I opened my eyes glancing at the clock beside me, wondering how long this was going to take. I stiffened as I felt the girl's hands travel to my hair.

**Time is moving much too slow.**

I could hear a moan escape her mouth as she tugged on my hair.

I reluctantly tightened my grip on her waist, bringing her closer.

**If she wants a real kiss, I will give her a real kiss. **

Before I knew what was happening I felt her tongue lick my lips. I quickly pulled away from her mouth annoyed.

"What did I say?"

"Sorry, I got caught in the moment."

"Time's up." I voiced as Miss Swan silently got off my lap, taking her spot back on the couch.

I took the time to count the money as she sat in silence, looking down at the floor.

"Nice doing business with you. You know the number if you require my services again." I said making my departure.

"Oh and Miss. Swan, next time you do the tongue thing this ends, understand?" I stated wanting to let it be known I didn't stand for that kind of slip up.

"Yeah." She whispered back showing her low self-esteem.

"Don't be embarrassed, you're not the first to make that mistake and probably won't be the last." I stated rolling my eyes as I made my way out the door.


	3. Wanting more

**BPOV**

I couldn't help but think of Mr. Cullen, wanting those firm lips on mine and to have those beautiful brown eyes staring into mine yet again.

So here I was, two weeks later, doing the very thing I promised myself I wouldn't do.

* * *

It didn't take very long for Mr. Cullen to arrive. He came in with a smug look on his face. The, yeah they all come back for more, look. Without saying a word he strolled over to the couch taking a seat.

After closing the door I turned back to find Mr. Cullen smiling sweetly, patting a spot for me to join him. I hesitated at first, taken off guard by his quickness.

"Umm, I was thinking, could we do more?" I asked shyly, blushing in embarrassment.

Mr. Cullen smirked at this, as if he had expected it.

"Ah, like what? I can't read your mind; you're going to have to help me out here Swan." He lectured from his seat.

I bit my lower lip reluctant to continue.

"Kissing, cuddling and I was thinking sleeping?" I answered unsure.

Mr. Cullen raised an eyebrow somewhat surprised by my request.

"Define Sleeping?"

I blushed yet again realizing what he thought I was asking for.

"Sleep, as in asleep, do you not do that?"

He gave me a strange look before breaking out in a light chuckle at my wish.

"Actually, you're the first to ask. I never thought about it, huh."

I stood there in silence as Mr. Cullen quietly thought it over. I could feel his eyes on me but I didn't dare look in his direction, already feeling nervous of his response.

"Okay, but not all night, two hours tops" he stressed.

I nodded my head in understanding as Mr. Cullen continued.

"So where are we doing this?"

"My room?"

He snickered at my uncertainty.

"Sounds like a plan."

At that, I silently lead the way to my bedroom. Awkward silence soon set in as Mr. Cullen observed around my room. I never had a guy in my bedroom before, and here Mr. Cullen's was, someone I barely knew, viewing my belongings and seeing all that was me, it was kind of unnerving.

"You mind if I lose the shoes?"

I snickered at his strange request, relieved some of the awkward was gone.

"No that's fine," I said doing the same myself.

Once I had my shoes off, I headed to my bed, pulling the covers over me once I was comfortable.

Mr. Cullen followed suit getting on the other side of the bed. We lay their staring at each other weirdly not sure what to do next. I suddenly got a wave of confidence or maybe it was just the temptation of having him so close, wanting his lips on mine. Whatever the reason, I found myself moving closer to him, lightly kissing his lips.

Mr. Cullen began to kiss me back however he abruptly stopped the kiss and began to scoot closer, wrapping his arms around my waist before leaning down to meet my lips again.

My hands immediately went into his hair, lightly running through the thick brown locks.

The slow delicate kisses soon turned swift and firm. Mr. Cullen's grip on my waist tightened. In response my hands tugged harder on his hair. He suddenly rolled on top of me, pinning me down with his weight. He brought his hands to my face, bringing me closer in the kiss.

It felt good, it felt really good, and I could almost believe we were a couple. It was amazing how comfortable he could make me feel in a matter of minutes.

Unexpectedly a moan escaped Mr. Cullen's mouth causing me to stop all action and pull away from his lips. I liked Mr. Cullen but I wasn't ready for anything other than kissing. He gave me a questioning look wondering why I pulled away. I played off the awkwardness, hugging his chest, hinting I was ready for sleep.

Mr. Cullen got the hint, rolling back to his side bringing me to his chest, cuddling with me. I immediately closed my eyes loving the feeling it gave me, to feel someone wrap their arms around me, to feel loved for a little bit even if it was just an act. I inhaled Mr. Cullen's manly scent, snuggling deeper into his grip as sleep took over.

* * *

Two hours later a beeping noise could be heard. I sighed opening my eyes. Instead of seeing a sleeping Mr. Cullen I saw the wall. I always tossed and turned, I guess some time during my nap I must of changed positions, away from Mr. Cullen's hold.

The beeping noise went off again, causing Mr. Cullen to shift in the bed.

"Beep, beep, be…"

The sound was instantly cut off.

I stayed put, waiting for the inevitable to happen, for his departure. I felt the bed move slightly with his movements, I was shocked to feel arms wrap around my waist, pulling me closer to him from behind. I smiled at this snuggling against him as I fell back asleep.

* * *

A couple hours later a phone started ringing. I scrambled to get it from the nightstand, though having difficulty due to Mr. Cullen's embrace. I looked over realizing it was his phone going off.

I grabbed it from the table wondering if I should answer it or not, If I should wake him. I looked down at it reading the name and text that was sent.

_Erica: Where are you? I'm lonely._

I stiffen at the message as reality kicked in, that play time was over. I then looked down at the time. My eyes popped out of me head noticing it was eight p.m. I slowly turned around to face Mr. Cullen. He in return pulled me closer to him in his sleep. He looked so cute when he slept, so peaceful and sexy.

**Is it even possibly for someone to look sexy in their sleep?**

**I guess it is. **

**I wouldn't mind waking up to that face every day.**

Mr. Cullen's stirring in his sleep brought me back to the situation at hand. I lightly pushed on his shoulder, trying to wake him up.

"Ed… ah, Cullen!"

He moved in his sleep.

"Hmm?"

"It's eight p.m. and someone named Erica texted you."

Mr. Cullen woke up abruptly, shooting up from his spot.

"Eight p.m.! Oh shit, Erica, fuck I'm late!"

He sprung off the bed in a rush, looking for his shoes.

I couldn't help but snicker at the scene before me, amused at Mr. Cullen's disarray. He always seemed so prim and proper, like he had it all together; it was nice to know he didn't. That he was just an average guy at least for those few minutes.

Mr. Cullen rolled his eyes at this.

"Whatever Bella."

I froze in my spot noticing his slip up.

**Did he just call me Bella?**

"Bella?" I questioned still in shock.

Mr. Cullen quickly caught on trying to play it off.

"Oh, what …you prefer Swan?"

"No, I like Bella," I answered back quickly.

**More than that, I like the way you say it.**

We stared at each other in silence as if he knew and I knew the walls Mr. Cullen spent so much time to build, were slowly coming down.

"I got to go," Mr. Cullen announced half way out of the room.

"See ya, Edward," I teased, loving the way his name rolled off my tongue.

He froze in his spot sighing, but let it go.

I smiled happily as he didn't try to correct me as he left.

**He's starting to let his guard down with me.**

I shivered remembering the text I read not so long ago, knowing Edward was on his way to see another girl, who he could possibly sleep with. I wondered how many girls he already slept with and how I secretly wished I was one of them.


	4. The girlfriend

**EPOV**

It was two weeks after my first interaction with Ms. Swan that I got a call back. I had the strong urge to roll my eyes and even laugh. Women were so predictable. I knew as soon as Kami, my secretary, told me that first day that it would be a one-time thing that it wouldn't. That's what they all said at the beginning but eventually they all called back for more. It was silly to think this Ms. Bella Swan would be any different. Not that it was a bad thing; it was kind of refreshing to find a woman/girl who didn't expect sex from me, in my professional life.

Ms. Swan was actually the first client I didn't feel stressed to see or opposed as to what was to come. I actually found myself looking somewhat forward to seeing her again. She was easy to please, there was no bullshit of playing a role or challenge of trying to make a woman get off like she never did before. No having to measure up to a certain image women had of me in their heads as mister prefect.

Ms. Swan was the one customer I could actually feel comfortable around. Well, as comfortable as you can be in the field I'm in. I almost felt like I could be myself around her which was saying a lot, considering I only met her once.

* * *

As soon as Ms. Swan opened the door, I wasted no time letting myself in taking a seat on the couch, getting comfortable. Normally, I wouldn't have been so intrusive, coming in without so much as a 'hi' but I was sick of playing games and Ms. Swan wasn't into games anyways. Besides, we both knew why I was there; there was no reason to deny it, might as well get down to business.

After shutting the door Ms. Swan turned to face me. The innocent look that she wore so well was gracing her features. I smiled warmly over to her, trying not to scare her off as I patted a spot on the couch, hoping she would get the hint.

I could see a brief uncertainty in her, as she eyed me suspiciously. I smirked amused that the girl actually thought I would take advantage of her when she the one that called for my services. If anyone had a right to be distrusting it would be me, and yet here I was quite at ease. There was something about Ms. Swan that was calming.

"Umm, I was thinking, could we do more?" Ms. Swan asked unexpectedly.

Her cheeks grew red as my eyes met hers from across the room. The sudden calm I felt was gone and replaced with the intense pressure to please my client's needs. I had a feeling Ms. Swan would ask for more. My clients always did. Nothing was ever enough.

**No one said pleasing a woman was easy.**

I forced a smile trying to ease her nerves, but my plan seemed to backfire as she looked even more anxious than before averting her eyes, looking down at the floor.

"Ah, like what? I can't read your mind; you're going to have to help me out here Swan," I voiced from my seat.

I waited for Ms. Swan to respond, watching in silence as she drew her lower lip to her teeth, biting down on it.

"Kissing, cuddling and I was thinking sleeping?" she asked unsure, making her request come out more like a question.

It took me a moment to take in what Ms. Swan was asking for. As far as I knew she was still a virgin, yet she was requesting sleeping. Surely I must have misunderstood her. I raised an eyebrow, confused by her command wanting to make sure we both understood each other.

"Define Sleeping?" I asked from my spot making her blushed yet again.

"Sleep, as in asleep, do you not do that?"

**She wants to nap?**

**Oh, this is one for the books.**

Bella Swan was definitely not my typical customer, but I kind of liked that, it kept things interesting. I was always curious what was going to come out of her mouth next.

I let out a light chuckle at her bizarre request.

"Actually, you're the first to ask. I never thought about it, huh."

I silently thought it over watching Ms. Swan's reaction as I considered the pros and cons of her request. I didn't really like the intimacy factor that sleeping next to someone gave but at the same time a nap didn't sound like a bad idea, in fact, it actually sounded quite nice considering the lack of actual sleep I got thanks to my job.

I looked Ms. Swan over, taking in her whole appearance. Her style or lack thereof did not change since my first meet with her, she still looked quite tom boyish and nervous as always, as if afraid of rejection.

I'm sure rejection was something she was used to considering she never had a boyfriend. Yet, even though her body language showed fear I could see a tiny glint of hope peeking through her eyes.

"Okay, but not all night, two hours tops," I stressed, wanting to draw the line somewhere to let her know it was strictly business.

She shook her head in understanding as I eyed the area.

"So where are we doing this?"

"My room?" she questioned with confusion and nervousness written on her face.

I couldn't help but laugh at her cluelessness. Ms. Swan looked like a lost little girl trying to play grown up for a day. It was hard to believe the girl was only three years younger than me.

She was the oddest thing. She acted so mature and informed when it came to everyday stuff but when it came to anything in intimacy she was a nervous wreck, a naive little girl.

"Sounds like a plan," I said trying to focus on the task at hand as Ms. Swan led the way to her room.

I was never more curious of what a girl's room looked like than I was when it came to Ms. Swan's, curious what this girl liked and somewhat eager to find out more about this mysterious girl. She was definitely a question mark, most of my clients talked about their life, likes and dislikes, you know basic information. However, Ms. Swan, I found is quite like me when it came to personal information, quiet and protective.

I didn't find it my place to question my clients about their personal lives, I figured if they wanted to let me in they would and most of the time I could care less about their lives but this girl was different. It bugged me that she was open enough to tell me she never had a boyfriend or been kiss but yet I still didn't gain much knowledge on her.

Ms. Swan made her way into her room, stopping in her tracks as I entered. I looked around hoping to find more about this unusual girl. I sighed somewhat frustrated at what I saw. The room was your regular boring white color; there were no pictures around of her, just of animals and other people.

**Okay, so she doesn't like to have her picture taken and apparently she likes animals, cats in particular.**

**Okay, it's a step up, not a big step but at least now I know something about her.**

"You mind if I lose the shoes?" I asked as I finished observing her room.

I could hear a childish snicker escape Ms. Swan's mouth at my question. I knew it was a stupid question to ask but I figured I would be considerate and ask anyways, considering it was her house after all.

"No that's fine," she said doing the same herself.

I watched as she got into her bed pulling the covers over herself. I waited till she got comfortable before joining her, getting in the opposite side. I had to admit it did feel good to be in bed. I had to remind myself that I was on a job to keep myself from snoozing off right then.

I turned to face Ms. Swan, not sure what she wanted first. I waited for her to speak, but she never did. I could see the nervousness start to come back to her as she slowly moved closer to my face, before kissing my lips in a light kiss.

I was shocked she actually had the guts to make the first move; most girls wanted the guy to make the first move. It was kind of nice for a change. I quickly went to work pressing my lips against hers, however struggling due to the distance between us. I sighed frustrated that I had to move from my comfortable spot, scooting closer, wrapping my arms around her waist as I started to kiss her soft lips again. I could feel Ms. Swan's hands in my hair, carelessly running her hands through it.

I was shocked at how nice it felt, she was surely learning fast. Even her kissing was getting better; I started to wonder if maybe she had practiced since my last visit. I shook the thoughts from my head putting my attention towards her lips rather than my thoughts. The slow delicate kisses soon turned swift and firm under my command, wanting Ms. Swan to experience the different kind of kisses there were, as well as wanting to teach her the basics. I tighten my grip on her small waist, wanting her to get the full effect. She tugged hard on my hair in response catching me off guard. Feeling my lust take over, I rolled on top of her delicate frame, pulling her face closer to mine in the kiss. For a moment I forgot where I was and just enjoyed the feel of her body against mine, moaning against her lips.

Ms. Swan suddenly stiffened underneath me, pulling away from my mouth. The shock was apparent in her face and I realized my mistake. Luckily, she didn't take my sounds of pleasure to heart and hugged my chest, letting me know she was ready for cuddling. I sighed in relief; the awkwardness was gone as I moved back to my side pulling her to my chest before sleep took over.

* * *

I was in a deep sleep enjoying the feel of the plush covers around my waist and warm body next to mine when suddenly the alarm went off to ruin my great sleep.

"Beep, beep, be…"

I slammed my hand on the snooze button.

**A couple more minutes of sleep can't hurt.**

I moved back to original spot wrapping my arms around Ms. Swan's sleeping form, enjoying the warmth her body gave off before shutting my eyes again.

* * *

Half way through my sleep I could feel Ms. Swan shift in the bed, moving over to face me. I moved closer accepting her warm embrace with open arms as I continue to sleep. All of a sudden I felt something pushing on my shoulder.

"Ed… ah, Cullen!" I heard in a whispered shout.

I stirred again trying to reclaim the comfort I felt not so long ago.

"Hmm?" I asked through closed eyes not ready to fully wake up yet.

"It's eight p.m. and someone named Erica texted you," she announced out of nowhere.

My eyes popped open as I finally registered what Ms. Swan had told me.

**Eight p.m., fuck I must have hit the off button thinking it was the snooze.**

**I can't believe I slept this long.**

"Eight p.m.! Oh shit, Erica, fuck I'm late!" I exclaimed jumping off the bed in a hurry looking for my shoes.

**Shit, she's gonna kill me.**

**I promised I wouldn't be late again and I'm fuckin late.**

I know I probably looked like a crazy mad man to Ms. Swan as I moved around her room but I was too wrapped up in trying to get out to care, even failing at my attempts to put my shoes on standing up. I could hear Bella, I mean Ms. Swan giggle at my expense. I rolled my eyes at the fact she was enjoying my stressful state.

"Whatever Bella," I replied successfully getting one shoe on before working on the other.

"Bella?" She questioned causing me too freeze in my spot.

I turned to face her as panic hit me.

**Shit, did I really just say that?**

**Bella? **

**Crap! **

I quickly covered myself, noticing her shocked state.

"Oh, what you prefer Swan?"

"No, I like Bella," she swiftly replied causing it to get weird again between us.

I looked Bella over in silence not sure how to take her response. Hoping I didn't just fuck up our peaceful work relationship.

"I got to go," I stated half way out the room, holding one shoe in my hand thinking how much trouble I was going to be in when I got home.

"See ya, Edward," Bella teased causing me to stop mid step.

**Well I guess that's fair.**

I let out a stressed sigh before hobbling out on my way home. I know I should have put Bella in her place but I was already so late and I knew she didn't take it to heart. I was more worried over what my girlfriend was going to do to me than about the consequences with Bella.

* * *

"Sorry I'm late, I got held up at work," I apologized, coming through the front door with a regretful look on my face.

Erica was sitting on the couch in the living room, reading. She looked up from her book meeting my eyes.

"It's fine; I'm use to by now," she stated in a calm voice.

I scanned her over not sure if she was upset or not.

I sighed in relief to see a slow grin grace her face, letting me know she wasn't angry.

I gave a small smile in return before heading over and pecking her lightly on the lips.

That's what I loved about Erica, she was very understanding. Most girls would have been bitching and complaining about my long work hours, Erica didn't do that, instead of being negative and focusing on the cons, she took and relished the moments we did have together.

I let out a tired sigh resting my lips against her forehead. I closed my eyes feeling my tired muscles cave into the couch's soft, cushy hold, taking in the whole day as Erica lovingly wrapped her arms around me, snuggling against my chest, making me faintly smile against her skin.

"Long day?" She asked mid snuggle.

"Something like that," I answered groggily feeling sleep take over.


	5. Walls coming down

**BPOV**

I opened the front door a week later to see a cheerful Edward.

"Bella," he greeted smiling warmly.

I stood by the door taken back by his odd behavior; usually he showed no emotion at all and acted very professional.

However, the way he was acting now was as if we were longtime friends or something. Remembering Mr. Cullen's rules, I was uncertain what to call him.

**Should I call him Edward, or would he get upset?**

Not wanting to push my luck I decided to stick with being formal.

"Cullen," I replied letting him in.

Edward waited for me to finish closing the door before he spoke.

"Bedroom?" he asked, wanting to make sure we were both on the same page.

I nodded as I followed behind; glad the awkward was slowly dissipating between us.

"Where else?" I challenged curious of his response.

Edward snickered before retorting, "You might be surprised."

I stopped short of my room, taken back. I could only imagine some of the things Edward has seen and even done in his field.

"Some freaky clientele huh?" I asked curious of his adventurous job.

"I'll say," Edward bragged heading towards the bed.

I followed, confused by the new emotion that suddenly hit me, jealously.

I got into bed as Edward reached over the night stand turning the light off. As soon as it got dark, our lips connected.

Edward wrapped his arms around me in the kiss as my hands took their rightful place in his hair.

I moaned against his lips, loving his gentle hold yet harsh kisses. I tugged on Edward's hair as well as wrapping my legs around his waist, wanting him closer.

Edward groaned in response, working harder on my mouth, adding a mixture of soft, slow kisses with hard, fast ones thrown together.

Our hands moved frantically exploring each other bodies.

My hands ran from his wild hair down to his curvy back, feeling his muscles under his shirt with every twist and turn he made while kissing me. I could feel his strong hands move as well. They moved from my back sliding lower to cup my butt, pushing my body closer to his.

After a half an hour of making out we broke away from each other's mouths, tired and with swollen lips. We stared at each other in the dark as we worked on regaining our breath. I gently played with Edward's hair as I tried to calm down.

"So, I'm curious, why no tongues?" I questioned.

Edward rolled his eyes, annoyed. "Bell," he warned starting to close himself off again.

I shrugged moving my hands away from him.

"What? I'm curious."

Edward snickered.

"Sure."

"It's too personal."

My eyes popped out of my head, obviously not expecting that answer.

"What, and sex isn't personal?"

Edward shook his head in disagreement.

"Not really, it's a job, nothing more."

I couldn't believe how casual Edward was making sex sound, as if there was nothing special about it.

"That's sad," I stated looking over at Edward.

He looked down at me clueless.

"What is?"

"That you given up on pleasure."

Edward shook his head disagreeing again.

"My work life and personal life are two different things."

"So you kiss normally in your private life?"

"Of course, I doubt my girlfriend would date me if I didn't," he confessed.

I stiffen at the news of a girlfriend.

"You're dating someone?"

Edward chuckled lightly at my odd question.

"Yeah."

"And they don't mind your profession?" I asked, wondering how his girlfriend could stand his job, to have so much trust in him.

"She doesn't know what I do." Edward said truthfully.

"Wow!" I replied not sure how else to respond.

Edward suddenly got a weird look on his face.

"Okay, let's not talk," he said moving over to recapture my lips.

I couldn't bring myself to kiss him back, feeling weird after learning the new information on him.

"What?" Edward questioned unable to read me.

"I'm sorry, it's just too weird," I confessed.

"It's business." Edward argued.

"Maybe for you," I blurted out.

"Are you saying you like me? You know how I feel about attachment, "he complained.

I rolled my eyes annoyed, seeing his panic on the subject.

"Don't worry I'm not a stalker, clingy kind of girl."

Edward sighed in relief.

"Thank god for that."

I playfully slapped his arm as he lightly snickered.

"Edward?"

"Hmm?" he questioned looking down at me.

"I'm ready for bed."

"Okay," he replied moving closer to me.

I moved, sitting on top of him, leaving him speechless.

After recovering Edward began to question my motives.

"Bella?"

I said nothing as I nervously started to take my top off.

Edward gasped trying to stop me.

"Bella, no."

"Why, you sleep with everyone else, why not me?" I whined not knowing what the big deal was. I leaned down kissing his neck.

Edward flinched as my lips made contact with his skin.

"You don't know what you're asking for," he warned, trying to scare me off.

"No?" I challenged as I reached down and grabbed him through his pants.

Edward jumped not expecting this and removed my hand firmly.

"I said no." He stated moving off the bed.

Pissed off I followed him across the room.

"Well I have the money, so I own you right now, and right now I want you," I lectured coming closer to him.

Edward's eyes widened taken back by my statement, he continued moving back from me.

"Excuse me?" he asked not believing my words.

I came closer pushing him roughly against the wall.

He stood there shocked at my sudden attitude switch.

I took the lead practically ripping his shirt off his body.

"You're sure?" he questioned, not wanting me to regret my decision later on.

I suddenly stopped all actions, looking into his eyes.

"Yes."

Edward nodded taking the lead, lightly pushing me on the bed.

As soon as our mouths touched we began quickly de-clothing each other. Once free of our clothing my eyes roamed over Edward's manhood gulping nervously. I've seen a guy's manhood before, in movies and stuff and it freaked me out. I had nightmares for weeks. Yet I never had seen one in person. Up close it was different, not as intimidating as I once thought. I eyed Edward's dick up and down, inspecting every detail of it, making sure I didn't miss anything.

**If someone asked me to describe Edward's manhood what would I say?**

**Really how would you describe someone's manhood?**

**Is there a right way?**

He's manhood was in good maintenance. Everything was all nice and trimmed in his pubic area. It was stiff, very stiff. From what I could see Edward was quite aroused, which would have been quite an ego boost for me if I wasn't so damn, insecure about my body. Edward's dick was a nice size too, from what I could see.

**I don't know where the sizes range from, but Edward is blessed I would say.**

**He's whole body is prefect.**

**He is prefect.**

I felt relatively calm until I remembered where Edward's dick was supposed to go.

**That is going to be in me?**

**How the hell is that thing supposed to fit?**

Edward kissed me hard on the lips distracting me from my thoughts when I felt him entered me.

I winched in pain, clawing his back. The pressure was very uncomfortable and the feeling of Edward's dick stretching my tight muscles hurt like a bitch. If I would have known the pain was going to be so intense I would have had second thoughts on this whole losing my virginity thing.

Edward suddenly stopped concerned.

"You okay?"

I closed my eyes sighing deeply, as I tried to take my mind off the pain. After I calmed myself down I nodded for him to continue.

Edward slowly pushed on. After a couple of minutes, the uncomfortable pain had vanished and we were both moving at a steady rhythm. Gasping and moaning in pleasure as sweat covered our bodies. I wrapped my legs around Edward feeling close to my climax.

I reopened my eyes looking up at Edward intrigued as he rode out his high, he bit down on his lower lip through his own shut eyes trying to keep from moaning out loud.

**He looks so sexy, trying to control his emotions.**

Feeling daring, I lifted my head up licking Edward's lips. Shockingly, he opened his mouth for me, giving me access. I took my shot, sliding my tongue into his mouth. Edward accepted it, allowing my tongue to play with his while he increased his speed grunting and panting in the kiss. Seeing Edward's excitement was all it took to set me off, I came willingly, moaning in delight.

Edward's mouth moved to my neck kissing it harshly as he met his own end. Once we regrouped, Edward rolled over to his side of the bed, pulling me close to him, as we fell asleep in each other's arms.


	6. Denial

**EPOV**

I woke up tired and cold, missing the warmth of Erica next to me. Lately work has been taking a toll on me, in more ways than one. The constant hours of putting on a façade and pleasing women was exhausting and made me feel more used than ever. I found myself despising sex, something I never thought I would as a guy. I mean sex is our thing. To be honest, I was surprised I even got hard anymore, with all the action my dick was getting and not being remotely attracted to the people I was banging either.

After a long, hard day of work, Erica usually wanted to be intimate, as couples do. I would always be too tired and worn out, so Erica settled for small kisses and cuddling. I was worried one day it wouldn't be enough, that I wouldn't be enough and she would leave.

I started out in this field for the money. It was good money and back then that's all it took to keep my interest, to keep me going. However, now I'm not so sure the money is even worth it anymore.

* * *

I crawled out of bed sluggishly making my way out of the bedroom in search of Erica. I found her in the kitchen with her back to me. The smell of coffee hung heavy in the air. As I stepped closer I could see Erica was multitasking, stirring her hot cup of coffee with one hand while she held her work papers in the other, reading while she stirred her morning brew.

Erica glanced over her shoulder sensing she wasn't along anymore, giving me a warm greeting as her eyes met mine.

"Morning babe, there's coffee on the stove if you want some, " she offered returning her eyes back to her documents.

"Morning," I groggily replied pecking the top of her head before retrieving a cup for myself. After taking a sip of the hot substance, I sat the cup down silently going over which client I had to see today.

**There's Ms. Holmes tomorrow, Mrs. Fields Friday, today I have, Bella.**

I smiled at the thought, glad I had a day to relax, a break from the normal chaos and bullshit my job entitled.

"So, what's on the agenda today?" Erica asked turning away from her work.

She gave me a small smile spotting my own grin.

"It's good to see you so content. I was starting to worry these long hours were beginning to make you hate your job."

My smile immediately dropped at her words. Erica didn't know what I did for a living, for all I know she probably thinks I'm just another suit at a firm. I never told her what I did; I never lied about it either. She just never asked me, I often wondered if I would be brave enough to tell her the truth if she ever asked. I still don't know. I'm afraid she wouldn't understand, no one I dated in the past ever did, they always thought the worst.

"I have to get to work," I quickly replied, avoiding her gaze as I headed to the bedroom to change. I scanned through my closet for something to wear.

"You know, I just realized something." Erica announced standing next to the door frame with her coffee in hand.

"Oh yeah, what's that?" I asked grabbing a dark blue suit and white shirt.

"You like Wednesdays." I turned around to face Erica, confused by her statement.

"Come again?"

She lightly giggled at my confusion.

"You like to work Wednesdays, your always more eager to start the day and more relaxed."

I stiffen up at her remark, watching on edge as she came in the room and over to me.

"If I didn't know any better, I would have thought there was a pretty girl at your office that you like," she teased, rubbing a hand over my bare chest.

I arched an eyebrow giving her a disbelieving look.

"Oh yeah, a girl that works one day out of the week, " I challenged.

Erica shrugged, removing her hand from my chest, looking insecure.

I gripped her shoulders making her look at me.

"Did you ever think maybe I'm eager to get to work because I finish early on Wednesdays, which means I have more time with you?"

Erica gave me a small smile.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"Honestly, you're what gets me through the day."

She gushed at my words meeting my lips in a sweet kiss.

"Glad to hear that, I have to get ready for work as well," she announced heading off towards the bathroom to shower.

* * *

The door opened to reveal a bright eyed Bella, she looked excited yet timid. Her reaction to me never seemed to change.

**Why do I make her so nervous?**

"Bella." I greeted warmly, smiling down at her.

Bella's eyes widened as her name left my lips, shocked by my friendly manner.

I figured since I already mistakenly called her by her first name, I might as well stick with it. She did say she liked it, and it was my job to please my clients after all.

Bella hesitated before replying. "Cullen," and opened the door wide so I could move past her.

I silently entered her house and waited for her to turn around before we got down to business.

"Bedroom?" I asked wanting to make sure they were both on the same page.

Bella nodded as she followed behind.

"Where else?" she joked.

I snickered as a defense but really it was anything but funny. It was annoying.

"You might be surprised," I retorted silently recalling certain places I have been asked to do the deed.

Bella stopped short of her room, turning back to face me.

"Some freaky clientele huh?" she questioned.

"I'll say," I said making my way in her room.

Every time my clients ask for sex it was always in a different place, one, never being a bed. They wanted it just about everywhere else, on the carpet, against the wall, on the sofa, on the kitchen table, in the shower or in the pool. Always trying to top themselves, as if just having sex itself wasn't enough.

**What ever happen to the old fashion, on the bed, sex? **

I guess it was a good thing though, that my clients were so spontaneous. It helped keep the borders between my job and my personal life.

Bella got into bed as I reached over the night stand turning the light off.

As soon as it got dark, our lips connected. I wrapped my arms around Bella in the kiss, bringing her closer as her hands made their way to my messy hair.

Her lips vibrated against mine as she moaned in the kiss, her hands tugged hard on my hair as if she couldn't get enough.

I muffled a groan feeling Bella's silky smooth legs wrap around my waist, enjoying the feeling of her soft, warm legs against my body. I could feel my dick start to respond as well, tingling as it started to awake from its sleep.

The kisses grew bolder over time, taking on a life of their own, becoming hard and demanding. Feeling Bella bravely run her hands down to my back, I grew more daring as well, moving my firm grip on her small waist down to her ass, pushing her body to mine, letting her feel all of me.

We broke away from each other as we ran low on air, our jaws sore and lips tired.

Bella rested on my chest, looking down at me with a curious look in her eyes as we both laid in silence working on regulating our breathing.

"So, I'm curious, why no tongues?" Bella asked quietly as she played with the strands of my hair, moving her eyes away from mine, as if worried I would get upset with her question.

I rolled my eyes, annoyed she had to question everything.

"Bell" I advised her, letting her know she was starting to cross a line, one I worked so hard to keep in place.

"What, I'm curious," she replied removing her hands from my hair.

I snickered knowing that saying very well. Girls where famous for doing that, the I don't care I just want to know bid, which really means I want to know, and there is a reason I want to know.

"Sure." I replied in disbelief.

**Jesus she wants me to kiss her with tongue. **

**Would that be so bad?**

**Yes, I made the rules for a reason, who would I be if I didn't stick to them?**

**The least I could do is answer her question.**

"It's too personal."

Bella's eyes widen, obviously not expecting that answer.

"What, and sex isn't personal?" she challenged.

I shook my head in disagreement as I thought it over.

**Sex is actually just that, sex, but kissing is sensual. With sex you can always pretend you're with someone else. Having sex is one of the most selfish things you can do. You use a person's body to get off. **

**Kissing is different, your close, intimate, there's nowhere to hide, your both truly connected and trying to please each other rather than just yourself.**

"Not really, it's a job, nothing more;" I answered seeing Bella's curiosity.

"That's sad," she stated looking down at me, almost as if she pitied me.

"What is?" I questioned not understanding her sudden concern.

"That you given up on pleasure."

I shook my head yet again at her confusion.

She was confusing sex and fucking with making love. I quickly set her straight.

"My work life and personal life are two different things."

"So you kiss normally in your private life?" Bella asked dumbly.

"Of course, I doubt my girlfriend would date me if I didn't," I joked.

I watched as Bella's carefree form, stiffened at the news of a girlfriend.

"You're dating someone?"

I chuckled lightly at her cluelessness.

"Yeah."

"And they don't mind your profession?" she questioned, shock clearly written on her face.

"She doesn't know what I do," I simply stated.

"Wow!" Bella retorted making me regret telling her.

**Why did I tell her all that?**

**I shouldn't be so open; normally if someone asked me something like this I would have put them in their place.**

**What makes this girl so different?**

**Why is it so easy to talk to her about this stuff? **

**I need to draw the line, let her know what is and is not appropriate. **

"Okay, let's not talk," I voiced leaning forward to recapture her lips.

My lips were inches from hers when she suddenly pulled away.

"What?" I asked unable to read her.

"I'm sorry, it's just too weird."

"It's business," I argued.

"Maybe for you," Bella defensively blurted out.

I was taken aback by her honesty.

"Are you saying you like me? You know how I feel about attachment, "I objected.

**The last thing I need is another client getting obsessed with me.**

**God I can't go through that again.**

She rolled her eyes annoyed, seeing my distaste on the subject.

"Don't worry I'm not a stalker, clingy kind of girl."

I sighed in relief, hoping she was being truthful.

"Thank god for that."

Suddenly I felt a slap on my arm; I thought maybe Bella was upset until a saw a small smile on her face, letting me know she was just being playful. I lightly chuckled in response, glad the tension between us was now gone.

"Edward?"

"Hmm?" I questioned moving my eyes back to her.

"I'm ready for bed," she announced.

"Okay," I replied happily, inching closer to her, moving my arm to her waist to pull her closer. However, Bella stopped me, pushing my hand away. I gave her a questioning look as she straddled my waist. It took me a minute to find my voice again.

"Bella?" I eyed her strangely wondering what she was thinking.

A look of determination covered her face as she lifted her shirt over her head, exposing her bra cover breast to me for the first time. It wasn't till I saw her reach behind her back to unsnap her bra that I broke out of my trance. I quickly grabbed her hands before they reached their destination.

"Bella, no."

"Why, you sleep with everyone else, why not me?" She argued, clearly offended.

I was trying to think of how to let her down gently when the feel of her lips on my neck broke my thoughts.

"You don't know what you're asking for," I voiced, trying to scare her off.

**She doesn't know what sex with me involves; she's too good for that kind of treatment, another fake act of intimacy without love.**

"No?" she challenged, taking me off guard as she grabbed me through my pants.

Instinctively my dick hardened. I quickly removed her hand, hoping she didn't take my dicks reaction to her touch as encouragement. I scrambled off the bed as she followed behind.

"I said no."

"Well I have the money, so I own you right now, and right now I want you," Bella voiced coming closer to me.

My eyes widened by her sudden forwardness. I continued moving away from her.

"Excuse me?" I asked somewhat afraid at her possessiveness as well as strangely turned on at the same time.

**When did she become so dominating?**

**Where is the shy Bella I know so well?**

For once I was the nervous one. I watched as Bella came closer, I could see her chest move with her every breath, her nipples hard with excitement. She pushed me hard against the wall. One minute her hands were running freely over my clothed chest, next she was ripping my shirt in two, exposing my built torso.

My dick strained for attention.

"You're sure?" I choked out, not wanting her to regret it later on.

She moved her lustful eyes from my chest to meet my gaze.

"Yes."

**I can't believe she wants her first time to be like this. To have to pay to lose her virginity, it doesn't seem right.**

**She should be losing it to someone special, not me.**

I was worried about making it good for her, I didn't want her first time to be bad, and I didn't want to cause her pain. I nodded at her request and regained the lead, gently backing her into the bed, pushing her down on it.

As soon as our mouths touched we began quickly de clothing each other.

Bella blushed deeply as soon as we were free of all our clothing. Embarrassed by me seeing all of her as well as scared of what was to come, she covered herself with her hands, with an unsure look on her face. She watched silently as I opened the condom wrapper and put it on.

There was an awkward silence before our lips met again. I pressed my lips against hers in a passionate kiss, distracting her the best I could as I thrust into her, breaking her barrier. I heard a faint cry come from her lips. I cringed as her nails dug into my skin clawing my back.

**That's gonna leave a mark.**

Once I succeeded in entering all the way, I brought my attention back to Bella's small frame underneath me, realizing how quiet she was being, worried she was in pain.

"You okay?" I asked seeing her eyes were tightly closed.

She nodded biting her lower lip. Not sure if I should continue or not I waited a minute before proceeding, slowly pushing back in.

**God this is a tight fit.**

**I hope it starts to feel good for her soon, I don't think I can keep this slow pace much longer.**

After a couple of minutes Bella eased my worry and started to move her hips up to meet my own. We moved up and down in prefect harmony. It wasn't long after that Bella started to release sounds of pleasure; her legs squeezed tightly around my waist, her hands griped my shoulders for dear life gasping and moaning in pleasure. I worked harder thrusting deeper and faster with each thrust feeling her end near as well as my own unraveling coming. I could feel the sweat trickle down my back and between our connected flesh as our bodies became overheated with hunger.

**Oh god, this feels so good.**

**So close.**

I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling the familiar build up threatening to put an end to my pleasure as well as Bella's. I bit my lip trying to hold off my climax wanting to prolong the experience as long as possible.

I felt something moist and soft against my mouth. I didn't have to open my eyes to know it was Bella's tongue.

Not wanting to ruin her first time as well as feeling overpowered by my own bliss, I open my mouth, allowing her access. The feel of her slippery tongue exploring my mouth sent me closer to my end. I caressed her tongue with my own as my hips picked up pace, smacking our bodies together as the bed squeaked in protest.

**Yes, fuck, yes.**

I found myself grunting and panting against her lips, as Bella met her end. I broke from her mouth meeting her neck, kissing it harshly as I came.

Once the blissful feeling was washed away I removed my condom placing it in a nearby trash can before gently bringing Bella's shaky body to my own. I pulled the covers over us, wanting to respect her instead of ogle her naked body as well as make her more comfortable. It didn't take long for her eyes to close, I quickly followed suit as sleep took over.


	7. Virgin no more

**BPOV**

I woke up in a complete sex daze. I had the most incredible high ever, with a smile plastered to my face and my hair a complete mess. My flimsy cream colored sheet was the only thing separating my body from Edward's.

**And what a body he has.**

Edward look like an angel sleeping next to me, his hair lay perfectly on his head, not a single strand was out of place. His eyes closed and relaxed, his mouth was slightly a jar fanning me with his warm breath and the sheet lay dangerously low on his hips, making his happy trail viewable. My eyes followed the hairy line knowing very well were it lead, blushing at the thought. I cuddled against Edward's sleeping form, loving the feeling of his bare torso against mine.

**I'm going to miss this feeling.**

Knowing our time together was slowly dissolving I leant down gently kissing his built chest, something I wanted to do last night but was to chicken too. Edward stirred in his sleep at the feel of my lips but didn't wake up. I carefully removed Edward's arms from my waist, not waiting to disturb his sleep before slowly moving off the bed in search of my clothes.

I let out a low hiss as the soreness hit me down below. Even though it hurt I smiled through the pain glad I was no longer a virgin. Proud I was now considered a full blown woman. After successfully getting a pair of shorts and shirt on I limped across my room taking a seat in my computer chair and waited for Edward to wake up.

I watched as Edward shifted in bed moving from his side to his stomach. Through closed eyes Edward's hands spread across the bed searching for something. Not finding what he was looking for his eyes opened, looking around the room until they landed on me.

**I think I'm in love, with a fantasy.**

**No good will come of this.**

"Hey." I greeted shyly not sure what else to say.

Edward rubbed his tired eyes trying to wake up fully.

"Why are you dressed?" He asked groggily.

**What?**

I gave him a strange look, lost by his question.

"Why wouldn't I be dressed?"

Edward shrugged in response before moving towards the edge of the bed. He slid the sheet off his body giving me a quick view of his firm ass before he grabbed his pants off the floor. I immediately blushed turning my head away to give him some privacy. I waited a good minute or two before turning back to face him. I turned back to find him zipping his pants up and grabbing his ripped shirt off the floor.

"It's for the best I guess, Erica is probably wondering where I am." Edward mumbled to himself more than me.

I suddenly woke up from my daze at the mention of the familiar name I found on Edward's phone.

"Erica?" I questioned.

"My girlfriend" Edward announced causing my heart to sink.

**His girlfriend was the girl he was rushing to see, no wonder.**

"I'll see you next week." Edward voiced letting himself out.

My joyful moment was gone in a blink of an eye. Now it was back to reality, I was all alone, and unwanted.

* * *

**EPOV**

I was sleeping soundly with Bella's soft body pressed up against mine, relishing in her warmth. I rolled over on my stomach getting comfortable. I shivered at the feeling of the ceiling fan hitting my exposed skin. Tired I kept my eyes closed as my hands lazily search for Bella's body missing her warmth. My hands roam freely cover the sheets finding nothing but bed.

My eyes popped open on alert scanning around for my bed mate. I scanned high and low around the room until I successfully found Bella. She was sitting in a chair across the room, looking down at me in wonder as well as nervousness. From the looks of her messy hair and scrubby clothes she just woke up herself. A small smile spread to her face as she greeted me.

"Hey."

**She's so cute.**

Bella was back to her nervous, fidgeting self, biting on her fingernails as I rubbed my sleepy eyes trying to wake myself up.

**What happen to miss confident from last night?**

"Why are you dressed?" I asked groggily.

It was odd to see a girl ready to call it day sort of speak, before me. I was usually the first one to end things, leaving the ladies pouting that they didn't get their way. My all work no play, hard to get act always left my clients wanting more. It was a thrill for them to try and win me over; it never worked of course, because to me it was a job and nothing more. Yet, with Bella I never felt the need to rush back to the office. Unlike my other clients, I liked spending what little time we had together. I never had a client like her, so down to earth and real and I doubt I ever would again.

Bella scrunched her face up in confusion.

"Why wouldn't I be dressed?"

Her words were honest and reasonable towards my strange question and they stabbed me to my very core. Here I thought being how it was Bella's first time having sex, something she obviously had never done before she might have wanted to sleep in, cuddle more, want seconds, have questions, shit I don't know, I just figured she would want something more from me before our time ended this round. I shrugged in defeat seeing how Bella seem fine with the way things were.

**Damn, okay I can take a hint.**

Realizing our time was done for the day I silently scooted to the side of the bed removing the thin sheet from my body before grabbing my clothing off the floor. It was quiet and somewhat awkward as I go dressed. I hurried my movements on my pants wanting to get out of Bella's hair as it was obvious she wanted me gone. I snatch my ripped shirt off the floor silently smiling of the memory of the confident Bella that wanted me, if only for a moment.

**I miss that girl, she was sexy.**

Suddenly Erica popped in my head, remembering I forgot to call and tell her I was not going to be home last night.

The truth was I wasn't expecting to stay last night but I figured it being Bella's first time, it was the right thing to do. I didn't want to cheapen her first time any more than it already was with her paying to lose her virginity. I figured she would want comfort after giving up such a precious gift as her cherry.

"It's for the best I guess, Erica is probably wondering where I am." I mumbled to myself still lost in my thoughts.

"Erica?" Bella questioned, reminding me she was still in the room.

"My girlfriend." I replied, grabbing my coat from the nightstand and shoes off the floor.

"I'll see you next week." I voiced letting myself out.

I silently entered my house, gently closing the front door behind me not wanting to wake Erica up if she was still sleeping. I let out a tired sigh setting my shoes by the front door and hung my jacket on the coat rack. Next I worked on unbuckling my belt heading toward the bedroom just wanting to take a shower and get refreshed after the long night I had. I walked through my bedroom door to find my girlfriend sleeping soundly in our shared bed. She was wearing the silky baby pink, nightgown I bought her for her birthday. It was my favorite nightie of hers and she knew it.

I frown slightly at the sight; Erica must have stayed up late waiting for my return. She only wore that nightgown when she wanted to be intimate with me. It was her subtle way of telling me she wanted sex.

I quickly disposed of my torn shirt as Erica started to wake. A small smile spread to my face at her sleepy form. She looked up noticing me in the room.

"Baby, where were you? I've waited till twelve o clock for you to come home; finally I gave up and decided to go to bed." She pouted fixing her now falling strap.

I sigh taking a seat next to her.

**God, what am I doing to this poor girl?**

"I'm sorry; I got held up at work and ended up sleeping over."

**Lie!**

**Okay, not really but it felt dirty to say.**

Erica scrunched her face in confused.

"You slept at the office?"

**Fuck, should I tell her the truth?**

I took a deep breath looking her worn out face over. It killed me to know she had no idea what I did for a living and what's worst, I felt guilty knowing, for the first time last night; I actually enjoyed sleeping with a client of mine. I never felt I did anything wrong before because I never was into it, but with Bella…

**Fuck it, what's a relationship without honesty, right?**

"Alright, I have to tell you something, but you have to promise you won't freak out."

Erica suddenly sobered moving into a sitting position, looking utterly concerned.

"What is it Edward, you know you can tell me anything?"

I gave a small smile, caressing her cheek, silently hoping her words were true before dropping the grin. I took a breath to calm my nerves before I continued.

"I need to tell you something you deserve to know. I just been too scared to tell you, thinking you wouldn't understand."

Erica stayed mute, lightly rubbing my back in encouragement for me to continue.

"There's a reason I'm never in the mood to have sex and stuff, why I come home drained from work just wanting to sleep."

Erica waited anxiously for me to continue.

"I'm an escort."

She blinked a few times looking at me in shock.

"What?"

I looked down at my hands in my lap too afraid to face her, worried to see a disgusted expression.

"I get paid to make women's fantasies come true, I have sex for money."

It was quiet, too quiet. I slowly raised my eyes up to her face to see shock, as she processed all the information.

**Don't leave me out in the dark. **

**Say something, please.**

"I wanted to tell you so many times before but at first I wasn't sure we would even last, I had so many failed relationships before and then we got serious and at that point I was scared to tell you, afraid you wouldn't understand that you wouldn't be able to handle it."

**Like the others.**

"You sleep with women for a living." Erica repeated to herself.

**Okay, now when you say it that way it doesn't make me sound too good.**

"I know it's a lot to take in." I voiced trying to grab her hands in mine.

Erica rejected my touch moving off the bed and across the room away from me.

"Oh god, and that's where you were last night, fucking some woman while I waited anxiously for your return like an idiot."

**Shit.**

"You're not an idiot." I protested slowly moving closer to her.

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why, why would you choose to tell me this now? I'm I supposed to say that's alright and wear a smile on my face? I'm I supposed to yell and scream and call you an asshole, because honesty I'm so taken back right now I don't know how I feel about this."

I shook my head in understanding stepping closer, moving my arms to encircle her. She shockingly let me.

"I want you, I want us. I don't want those other women. I wasn't attracted to them when we…"

**Except maybe Bella.**

Erica suddenly pulled out of my hold looking freaked out.

"I can't deal with this right now. How can I kiss you knowing where your lips have been? How can I touch you knowing you could be picturing someone else? How do I know your now faking with me too?"

"Erica." I sighed stressed out.

"Do you love me?"

"What?"

"It's a simple question Edward, do you love me?"

"I love who you are as a person."

"That's not what I wanted to hear, but then again none of this is, I'll start looking for my own place tomorrow."

I stood there stunned as Erica entered the bathroom shutting and locking the door behind her.

* * *

**Note: **Review! ;)


	8. Confessions

**EPOV**

**Why couldn't I just tell Erica that I loved her?**

Those were the words stuck in my head the whole time as I watched Erica pack a bag of clothes. The silence between us was unnerving, the only noise that could be heard was the sound of the dresser drawers opening and closing as she picked through her things.

Once she finished rummaging through the drawers she zipped her suitcase satisfied.

She glanced over at me briefly telling me she was going to be staying with a friend until she could get the rest of her stuff. I wasn't sure why Erica felt the need to tell me where she was going, it was pretty obvious she wanted nothing to do with me anymore. I guess she was just trying to fill the silence.

Once she had all she needed for the day she made her way out the door leaving me into my thoughts.

It haunted me. The thoughts of all this time I had been with Erica, going as far as moving in together and I couldn't for the life of me bring myself to say three little words. I. Love. You.

Maybe because I never did love her.

**If I loved her, wouldn't I be hurt? **

**How come I feel nothing?**

**I mean I'm sad that it ended like this but I don't feel heartbroken. I don't feel anything like how people describe having your heart broken to feel. **

It's crazy to live with someone and not to even know if you loved them. I meant what I said; I loved the person Erica was. She was attractive on the inside and the out. She was the kind of girl I had hoped I would love.

There was a time when I thought I did, but I guess I was wrong. I mean, when you love someone, you don't hesitate when they asked you that question right? You wouldn't just all of a sudden rethink your whole relationship with that person.

Erica was the closest I ever came to love and I thought that would be enough. That if I wanted to give my whole heart to her I could, but I guess love doesn't work like that, you can't pick and choose who you love, then again I wouldn't know. I've never been in love to know the feeling.

It was difficult to concentrate on work after everything that happened with Erica. This week was the hardest. It was like a slap to the face. Like God was silently telling me you can't have it all. I always sucked at relationships. Erica's was the first that looked promising and then all of a sudden it was like the rug was pulled from underneath me. Like God was teasing me, telling me I would never have a successful relationship, that I would always be a relationship failure.

It's hard to have faith after something like that. Maybe that's why I never have been in love. I never believed enough in it to put myself out there enough to feel it.

And too make matters worse, Bella never made an appointment for the week. The one person left, that made me feel good, decent, was abandoning me. I had to see her. To hear it from her own mouth, to know our time together was truly over, so I could stop obsessing about the stupid feelings that came over me whenever I was around her.

* * *

**BPOV**

I've been sick. I don't know how it happened but somehow between last week and now, I caught a really bad cold. It perplexed me and pissed me off at the same time. I never got sick, never. I wasn't a health freak or anything but I was good a keeping myself healthy for the most part. You hear about people getting sick from close encounters with other people, but I barely hung out with anyone and none who looked sick.

**So, how did I get sick?**

**Maybe it's stress? **

**Yes, that could be it.**

**Stressed over what? **

**Maybe my situation with Edward.**

I never thought I would be in this situation from the start, to pay someone for sex only to end up having feelings for them in the end. It was a bizarre situation to be in and I feared it would only get worse.

The whole week I have been miserable. I spent the entire time coughing and sneezing, I had a stuffed nose and I could barely sleep as it was. Even through all that, my mind was elsewhere, thinking of Edward and who he could possibly be seducing at that very moment.

I hated feeling dependent on people but that's exactly what I felt with Edward. I felt dependent on his touch and the way he made me feel. His strong hands, his soft lips, his… Even his eyes made me melt. I didn't want to be, for I knew it was just a job for him. It would only end badly. Even more, I didn't want rejection which I was sure was to follow, considering Edward's job and the fact he had a girlfriend.

It was a bright sunny, beautiful day outside. The prefect day to go to the beach or have a picnic and all I wanted to do was draw the blinds to my house and go back to sleep. I was contemplating that very idea when I heard a knock at the front door. I let out a tired sigh before slowly making my way over.

**This better not be a salesman, I don't have the strength for one of their long ass speeches.**

I carefully opened the door trying to shield myself for the sun's bright shine as much as possible. My mouth dropped at the sight before me, there on the other side was Mr. Prefect himself. Not only was I shocked to see him at my door, I was shocked to see what he was wearing at my door. I was so used to seeing him in a suit with his hair slick back acting all professional and there Edward was, hair free of gel, looking like a sexy mess, wearing a plain white t-shirt and comfortable fit blue jeans.

**Definitely a better surprise than I thought.**

**What is he doing here?**

Edward spoke noticing my shocked expression.

"You didn't make an appointment this week I wanted to see what was going on, if you were still alive." He said a little worried yet irritated at the same time.

I wasn't sure how to take it. Noticing his attire I knew it must have been important for him to go out of his way to see me seeing how he usually liked to keep things professional.

**Maybe he was this way with all his clients when they don't reschedule him? **

**He's probably worried about his paycheck, yeah that must be it.**

I gave a weak smile trying to kill the tension.

"Thanks, I've been sick." I said as a matter of fact.

Edward's tough exterior softened at the news.

"Sick, oh yeah, you don't look so good." He said examining my pale complexion, before sliding past me into my house.

"Thanks what every girl wants to hear." I said rolling my eyes.

"Here, let me help you." Edward suggested, taking me by the arm helping me to the couch as if I was an old lady.

**I'm just sick, I'm not dying.**

"I'm fine you don't have to." I insisted taking a seat.

"Happy to help." Edward chipped in. Grabbing the wet, wash cloth from my grasp and placing it on my forehead.

"Where's your family?" He asked putting light pressure on the cloth so it wouldn't fall from my head.

"Some are at work, others, out of state." I answered.

Edward's eyes grew big.

"No one is taking care of you?"

I shrugged in return.

"I can manage." I said as I struggled to grab my water from the nearby table.

"Yeah, I see that." Edward replied before pulling out his cell phone.

I watched curious as he began to speak into the phone.

"Kami, reschedule all my appointments for the day."

I let out a gasp in shock before finding my voice.

"Edward no, don't." I pleaded feeling bad already for his efforts to help me.

Edward ignored me as he continued talking to his secretary.

"Yes, something important came up, thank you."

My heart melted at his words.

**I was important?**

Once he hung up his phone he turned back to me, returning his hand to my forehead, holding the cool cloth up.

"Thank you."

"No problem." He said giving me a warm smile.

* * *

**Note: **Sorry for the late update. I've been busy being lazy. I guess I'm in the holiday mind set of just wanting to eat crap and take it easy, lol! Anyways, review! ;)


	9. Crossing lines

**Note: **The long awaited chapter 10. Sorry it took so long. A lot of things got in the way, the holidays, work, lack of inspiration etc… This chapter takes place where chapter 9 left off pretty much, with Bella being sick and ironically enough I got sick today. Go figure.

* * *

**EPOV**

I came over to Bella's expecting to find a fully satisfied, confident lady standing in front of me. Believing she would blow me off considering we didn't have an appointment this week, and take the same attitude as all my other clients did, that I was beneath them, just a sex toy to them. However, that didn't happen. I was shocked to find a very sick, worn out version of her, standing in the doorway. It relieved me somewhat, to know that was the reason she didn't make an appointment.

Seeing her discomfort I offered her my services, my assisting services that is. I never took care of a client before but seeing how weak and helpless Bella was on her own, I couldn't just leave her by herself, not in her condition. It just didn't seem right.

I stayed by Bella's side for what seemed like hours, helping her with little things. If she needed more water I would refill her cup so she didn't have to burn too much energy, and if she needed a tissue I brought her one. We pretty much spent the time watching tv and chit chatting. I was actually expecting it to be a little weird but it wasn't. The opposite actually, it felt like I was hanging with a friend.

"Well, I should get going it's starting to get late. You think you can manage without me?" I asked wanting to make sure she didn't need help with anything else before I left.

Bella shook her head yes, letting out a snuffle.

"I think I can manage thanks."

I gave a small smile before heading toward the front door.

"Oh, I almost forgot." Bella blurted out walking over to me.

I gave her a questioning look as she took one of my hands, turning it over so it was palms up.

"Here, for your time." Bella explained shoving a pile of cash into it.

**She thinks I did this for the money?**

**Does she really think I'm that cold?**

I frowned down at the money in my hand before extending my hand out towards Bella.

It just didn't seem right to take her money considering she was sick and my time with her wasn't an official appointment.

"You keep it."

"What?" Bella asked looking clearly shocked by my words.

"If you keep paying me you'll run out of money." I voiced trying to sway her.

Bella scrunched her face in confusion as she began to reply.

"Well I admit I'm not rich but it's part of the deal. I don't understand why my money's not good all of a sudden." Bella said sounding somewhat offended.

I ran a hand through my hair feeling stressed, not wanting to have to explain myself and not understanding why I had too.

**Why do I have to explain myself?**

**Can't a human being doing something nice for someone else just because?**

**Why does there have to be a reason?**

"It's not about the money." I expressed.

Bella look at me in confusion, clearly not understanding my recent actions. I didn't even understand them. There used to be a time I was so money hungry I would have taken the money without even batting an eye.

It was just everything was going so good between us and my mind was at ease away from my troubles and stress and when Bella thrust the money in my hand it was like a rude wake up call. The money was like a silent reminder that my job stresses were still there, waiting for me when I left and that Bella was just another client, not a friend.

"Look, I'm sorry, your right." I sighed shoving the cash in my pant pocket.

"Thank you. I'll see you next week." I declared before grabbing the knob of the door.

"I know this is against the rules but, are you okay?" Bella suddenly asked, causing me to halt my movements.

I turned around to face her, seeing the worry and confusion written on her face. At that moment I wanted to cry. I've never felt so lost, so frustrated. Bella was a client, yet so much more. I felt close enough to her to want to voice out my frustrations to her, tell her about my life, yet I couldn't because we weren't friends. It was strictly business and that's the way it should be.

"Yeah, I'll see you next time." I said trying not to let my stress show.

"You know, Edward, you don't have to be so strong all the time. If you need to talk I'm here." She announced sweetly.

"Thanks Bella, I appreciate the gesture but it's unnecessary and also inappropriate, and please call me Mr. Cullen.

Bella looked between being hurt and offended at the same time. I wanted to take back my harsh words but I couldn't, the damage had been done and they were true. She was a client and the lines between us somehow got blurred during our time together. It was time to get things back to they why they once were.

"Fine." Bella replied weakly as I reluctantly made my way out trying to stick to the code.

* * *

**BPOV**

Everything was going great until I had to open my big fat mouth and ruin it. I should have known better. I was just another client; this was a job to Edward. It's just he looked so stressed, I thought he needed to confide in someone and I was stupid enough to believe that, that someone could have been me.

I couldn't believe he actually turned my money down. I just wanted to help him out like he did me. After Edward spent his work day taking care of me and canceling his other appointments, I thought it was the least I could do. I had a hunch Edward turned down my money because he pitied me, being how I was sick and everything and I didn't want him too. I didn't want to be perceived as this weak little girl that couldn't take care of herself.

I was glad when he stopped being so stubborn and finally took the money. I would have felt guilty if he didn't take it, considering he was losing money by staying with me.

I saw something in Edward change when he started for the door, he looked so frustrated. I didn't see Edward as the confident escort I met each week, I saw a lost boy, desperate for someone to talk to.

Edward was quick to shoot me down when I offered my time, which kind of hurt but I understood, it was business. However, when he told me to call him Mr. Cullen instead of Edward, it pissed me off. I wanted him to leave at that point.

He was blaming me, accusing me of being improper when he was the one coming over my house when I didn't even make an appointment, asking question he had no right too. At that point I wasn't even sure I wanted to make an appointment for the next week either.

* * *

**Note: **Hope you guys enjoyed it. Anyways, next chapter you will get a little more insight into how Edward feels and more reasons why he made the rules for his job. ;)


	10. First name basis

**EPOV**

I left Bella's house taking off in my car not sure where I was going. I had so much crap bottled up inside, with my job, my break up, and Bella. I drove in silence watching the scenery go by before me, hoping the drive would help clear my head.

**Why did I snap at Bella? **

**She was only trying to help.**

**Maybe it would be good to let out my concerns with someone else.**

**Maybe then I wouldn't be so stressed all the time.**

After a couple of hours of driving around, I found myself pulling back into the familiar drive way.

* * *

I hesitated before knocking not sure how Bella would react to seeing me again after what I said. I wasn't even sure if she would open the door for me, not that I would blame her.

I gave a gentle knock at the door. It was quiet; I was starting to think maybe Bella was sleeping when I heard the sound of unlocking on the other side of the door followed by it slowly opening. The look of confusion was clearly written on Bella's face.

"Edward? I mean Mr. Cullen, what are you doing here?" She questioned.

"Is your offer to talk still good?" I asked feeling nervous she might turn me down and shut the door in my face.

She remained quiet for a moment as she scanned me over, taking in my worried state, which I'm sure was easy to see. I was fidgeting. I never fidget.

Yeah, sure come in." She voiced, opening the door wider so I could pass.

* * *

"Who's Jessica?" Bella asked raising an eyebrow in confusion.

"Jessica was my first client. I was less guarded back then. She's basically the reason I made the rules, most of them anyways." I explained.

Bella remained silent encouraging me to continue.

"Jessica was a freaking stalker. I took her on as a client like a dumb ass even though I saw signs that she would be clingy. I knew from first day she was going to be trouble. I was going to decline her and I think she could tell too. She started to cry about how no one wanted her and all this crap.

So feeling bad and not wanting to hear more of her whiny bullshit, I agreed. For two months Jessica would not leave me alone. She blew up the work line non- stop and even showed up at my gym once. That was really crossing the line. Jessica tried to play it off telling me it was just a coincidence. Coincidence my ass, that lady did not live near me, there was no way that she ran into me by chance. She even went as far as breaking into my work place and found out my cell number, which I had to change because of her. Finally I got a restraining order on her and thankfully haven't heard or seen her since."

Bella remained quiet but I could see the wheels turning in her head as she put two and two together. I waited for her to absorb everything before I went on.

"As far as kissing my clients on the lips, there are a couple of reasons why I deny it. In my field, girls usually think if a guy kisses them on the lips that the guy is falling for them, and that generally leads girls to stalking and become obsess. Believe me, you don't' think it happens and then wham! Stalker. Second would be my significant other, I want some intimacy to be kept between me and the person I'm seeing at that time. Lastly, I just find it uncomfortable. It's easier for me to be interested or pretend to be interested in sex with a girl rather than kissing a girl. I can't explain it; it's just hard to escape the person you're kissing, whereas when you're having sex you can think about whomever the fuck you want to get you off. I don't know maybe it's just me."

I turned to face Bella anxious for her response. She eyed me curiously before she began to speak.

"So, why did you tell me all that? I mean, I'm a client."

"I don't know, I guess, I trust you, and I really don't trust anybody." I confessed.

I watched as Bella lightly blushed at my comment.

"This job takes a lot out of you, you know?" I asked even though I knew Bella had no clue what I was going through.

"I gain money, but I lose my private life in return."

"Why do you do it?" Bella asked intrigued.

"Do what?"

"Why do you continue to work this job if it makes you so miserable?"

"I don't know, I guess I just got so used to it, it's all I know now." I voiced running my hands through my hair, trying to sooth my tension.

"How did you get in this profession anyways?" Bella asked.

"I always had a passion for music. I wanted to become a musician. I went to college for a couple of months but I couldn't afford my classes, so I had to find a job to support myself. My roommate at the time introduced me to a friend of his that Escorted on the side. I thought I could do that. I could sleep with pretty girls, make big bucks and quit as soon as I had enough to pay for my college classes. Of course nothing ever works out like you think it will. I ended up having to work five days a week just to make ends meet. I didn't realize I had to build up a clientele on my own, build up a pay grade. It took a while before I started making decent money doing what I do and by that time, college was the last thing on my mind."

"It's not too late you know, you could always go back to college and become a music teacher." Bella suggested.

It meant so much that she would listen to me complain and not think any less of me.

I looked over at Bella, her hair was up in a messy bun with a couple of strain fallen out, hanging by the side of her face and her nose was all pink do to her constantly blowing her nose. She looked so cute. I leaned in giving Bella a small kiss on the cheek in gratitude for listening. Bella looked taken back for a moment but she recovered quickly.

"Do I have to pay for that to?" She joked, trying to make light of the situation. I frowned slightly feeling like the nice moment we shared was cheapened.

"On the house." I replied not wanting to make Bella think she did something wrong.

She lightly giggled in response.

"Well I better go." I declared noticing it was nearly twelve.

Bella frowned at my news of departure.

"Yeah, bye Cullen."

I stopped mid step turning to face her.

"Bella?"

"Yeah?" She answered unsure.

"You can call me Edward."

"But I thought you said…" She started to question.

"I know what I said, I changed my mind. Besides I like when you call me Edward."

Bella suddenly lighten up at this.

"Cullen just makes me sound so old." I replied.

Bella snickered at this before smiling.

"Okay, bye Edward."

"Bye Bella."

* * *

I left Bella's house feeling better than before, feeling like a weight have been lifted. It was a relief to get all that stuff off my chest and talk to someone about it. I really appreciated Bella listening to me knowing she didn't have too. I could see a real friend in her. I just hoped she felt the same.

* * *

**Note: **After Bella invites Edward inside. I start their conversation mid-way. So, when Bella says Who's Jessica? That's the middle of the conversation they were having. I didn't want to have to write every single thing they could possibly be talking about. I wanted to kind of cut in mid-way, like they do in conversations a lot in movies. I tried to give it the same effect. I hope this doesn't confuse anyone.

I have a new story I just started called Office Desires, which is also a Bella/Edward story if you're interested. Review please! ;)


	11. Eager to learn

**BPOV**

It has been a couple days since I last saw Edward. I was now sick free and more informed on whom this mysterious God-like creature was. I felt special, knowing Edward was not one to open up and yet he was able to do it with me. It meant a lot to know that he felt he could trust me with his feelings like that. I just hoped we could keep our growing bond.

I know one day it will end, whether it is from me coming to my senses, realizing Edward would never be interested in me as anything other than a client or a friend. Soon enough it will hit me and I wanted to avoid that as much as possible.

I was working on cleaning my house up from the mess I made over my sick time, with the sink piled up with dishes and used tissues throw everywhere. I was in the middle of drying a dish when my phone rang. I gently set the plate down in the drying rack before reaching across the counter top towards my phone. It rang twice before I brought it up to my ear.

"Hello?"

"Bella, where the hell have you been? I've been calling you for weeks now. I was starting to worry something happened to you." Alice, one of my friends, lectured.

I rolled my eyes at her hyper ways. Alice was always an excited person; she got worked up about everything. She was a very nice person and good friend but sometimes she could be quite annoying. I could only take so much of her craziness. I needed my space from her every once in a while, to get away from the squeals of excitement and the shopping trips.

**Oh god, the shopping trips.**

**I hope she doesn't think I'm going to go shopping with her.**

"Hello, Bella?" she asked reminding me she was still on the line.

"Yeah, I'm here."

"So, what gives, why haven't you called?"

"I've been busy." I stated hoping she would buy my weak excuse.

It wasn't a complete lie; I mean I had been busy over the last few weeks, with Edward. Though, I would never tell her that. She didn't even know of Edward, no one did. I was too embarrassed.

**I mean who tells their friends they are seeing an Escort to grasp to what a real relationship would be like? **

My friends didn't even know I was a virgin, back when I still was one. Though I'm sure they had their assumptions.

I guess I could relate with Edward on that level. I liked to keep some things private, that and I was too ashamed to let my friends know what an inexperienced dork I was.

"Busy huh?" Alice huffed annoyed on the other side of the phone, as if she didn't believe my explanation.

I guess I should have used a different reason. Alice knew I had no social life. My life consisted of work and my friends. That was it. In short, I had no life.

"Yeah, work has been killer lately. Uh, so what's up?" I asked trying to ease away from the tension that stood between us.

"Well, I guess I'll forgive you. I know you would never intentionally ignore me, right?" She questioned in a skeptical tone.

"Right." I answered quickly not wanting to get on Alice's bad side.

I didn't even know if Alice had a bad side but I didn't want to test that theory either.

"Cool, actually I have been calling you…" She started emphasis the words have been.

"Because I found the prefect guy for you." Alice finished, the excitement was evident in her voice.

I let out a frustrated groan. I never have been on a date, ever. However that hasn't stopped my friends trying to set me up over the years. I always rejected kindly. I didn't want them to think I didn't appreciate them trying to help me with my lack of a love life but I wanted to find someone on my own. I didn't want to be set up with some guy my friends thought was prefect for me. I wanted to be my own judge. It was my opinion that matter in the end anyways.

"Really Alice, haven't we been over this time and time again?" I argued.

"Oh, Bella come on, live a little. I promise you will love him. " Alice praised into the phone.

I was about to turn Alice's offer down when I started to realize something. She was right. I never did anything outside of work or hanging out with my friends. How would I ever meet someone that way? I wouldn't. I would end up an old, depressed woman living with a room full of cats and the memories I shared with Edward, wishing I would have listened to my friends back when I had a chance to change my life for the better. I shivered at the thought as Alice's annoyed voice came out of the speaker.

"Bella, I don't have all day."

"Okay, I'll do it." I said cringing as the words came out of my mouth.

Alice squealed in sheer joy nearly breaking my eardrum in the process. I quickly withdrew the phone from my ear as she continued her loud screams of celebration.

**I'll be lucky if my hearing fully recovers.**

Suddenly something occurred to me.

**Shit, how do I explain to my date that I've never been on a date before, that he will be my first ever?**

**Do I tell him?**

**Shit, he's going to think I'm such a loser.**

**What if he wants to kiss me too?**

**Edward is the only guy I ever kissed before. What if he thinks I'm a bad kisser?**

**Shit, what if he wants sex?**

I groaned out loud frustrated forgetting how complicated this would all be.

**Is it too late to cancel?**

"You okay Bella?" Alice asked obviously hearing my sounds of protest.

"Yeah, fine. Ah, so tell me about my prefect guy."

Alice giggled before she started to describe Mr. Prefect himself. I had to admit after hearing everything, he actually sounded quite appealing. I wondered if he would find my description as engaging, your average loner girl, who has no life.

**What's not to love?**

No doubt Alice exaggerated about me to the poor misinformed guy.

**What if he's disappointed at what he sees?**

**I'm definitely no model and I'm not out going in the slightest.**

**To most guys that's a turn off, at least from what I hear.**

"Oh, and Bella…" Alice started grabbing my attention once more.

"He thinks you're a really cute girl."

I rolled my eyes at her words.

"Alice, what did you tell him about me?" I demanded worried I wouldn't live up to her claim.

"Nothing, I swear. He says he remembers you from school and you were very cute."

"We went to school together?" I asked in disbelief.

"That's what he said." Alice answered.

"How come I don't remember anyone to that description?" I questioned.

"I don't know. He said he wanted to ask you out back then but you always kept to yourself and looked content with being left alone."

I cringed at the thought but it was true. I was a closed off person. I just never realized it showed on the outside as well.

**Do I really come off as cold to others?**

**Maybe I should work on my body language?**

"So what's his name again?" I asked feeling nervous.

"Jacob Black. He's really nice; I met him last week while I was shopping."

I had to roll my eyes at that.

**Of course she did.**

**Does the girl ever not shop?**

"Anyways, when I started talking about my single friend and he mention you guys went to school together, I thought it was perfect. You know, like in the movies. They meet, nothing happens only to meet years later and fireworks."

**She watches too many damn movies.**

I looked up at my clock realizing I had been on the phone with Alice for a good hour. The girl could really hold up a conversation.

"Uh huh, look Alice, I have to go. I have things to do."

"What are you doing today?" Alice asked intrigued.

"Cleaning." I replied, sighing into the phone, noticing I still had quite a bit left to do.

"You have got to be the most boring person I know. It's a beautiful bright, Saturday afternoon and you're cleaning."

"Yeah, yeah I know. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, see that you do, oh, and have fun cleaning." Alice voiced amused.

At that I clicked my phone off and headed back to work on my dishes.

**Maybe it's good that I hired Edward, I mean now I know the basics when it comes to kissing and sex.**

**Maybe he can help me prepare for my date.**

**I need lots of practice.**

**

* * *

**

It wasn't long after I finished washing my dishes I found myself dialing the familiar number.

"Escort services, how can I help you?" The one of many, secretaries answered.

"Yes, ah, Mr. Edward Cullen's Office please." I replied sweetly.

It wasn't till after calling a couple of times that I found out Edward wasn't the only Escort working at the company. I learned it the first time I called when the poor secretary had to run off the twenty or so others that worked there. I didn't know who to choose, to tell you the truth. It was all luck I guess. After the secretary finished running off the list I couldn't remember a single name, except one, Edward's.

I was cut off from my thoughts at the sound of Edward's personal secretary on the line.

"Mr. Edward Cullen's office, this is Kami, how can I help you?"

"Yes, hi Kami, it's Bella."

**How is she is supposed to know who you are by your first name?**

**Lord only knows how many clients Edward has.**

"I mean, Bella Swan." I quickly fixed.

"Yes, Ms. Swan, what can I do for you today?" She asked automatically.

I could hear the sound of her typing on the computer as she waited for my reply.

I had butterflies in my stomach. I was so nervous but I couldn't understand why. I had been seeing Edward for a month now and found myself feeling more comfortable around him the more time we spent together. Yet I was now feeling nervous asking for his services.

**Maybe it was because Edward had just recently opened up to me or maybe it was the reason behind my call.**

**Maybe I felt like I was betraying Edward, going out on a date behind his back. It's not like we are together though, why should I feel ashamed?**

**I shouldn't. **

**I won't.**

**I need to move on with my life whether Edward agrees to help me or not.**

"Ms. Swan, are you still there?" Kami asked.

"What? Oh yeah, sorry. I would like to make an appointment for next week."

"An appointment for Wednesday?" She questioned knowing that was my usual day with Edward.

"Yes, please." I answered blushing slightly.

I could only imagine what this Kami thought of me. I was probably just another desperate woman in need of Edward's gentle touch in her eyes.

I shivered at the thought, remembering the feel of Edward's hands on me. The gentle caresses his strong hands possessed, wishing I could feel them on me now. I was becoming sick with want for Edward. I had to stop seeing him before it got out of control. However, before I decide to end things, I want to learn some more for my date with Jacob.

"Okay, Ms. Swan, I have a spot available on Wednesday at three o'clock."

"Prefect, I'll take it."

* * *

**Note**: Review! ;)


	12. Dating advice

**EPOV**

I took a seat on Bella's sofa in the living room, ready to start our next session. I figured today we could be a little adventurous. I usually opted for the bedroom, but Bella was so unlike my other clients, very proper and closed off. It was time she learned to be more open, sexually that is.

I smirked, gesturing Bella over to me with my finger. She bit her bottom lip, nervously, eyeing the scene before her. Though hesitant, she move her small feet towards the couch until she was right in front of me. I gave her my best bedroom eyes while I unzipped my pants. Bella's eyes filled with a mixture of confusion and desire.

**How cute, did she think I wanted to talk again?**

Talking was the last thing on my mind. I was here for business and I will be damned if I let my emotions get the best of me, like my slip up last week. I thought sex on the couch was just what we needed. Bella needed to know the fun, sexy side of sex, that wasn't focused on loving touches, rather lust and greed and I needed to erase any emotional feelings I have gained with my time with her. I figured fucking Bella on the couch where I revealed some of my secrets to her would help mend the damage I caused to our working relationship. Sure, it was harsh but that was all I knew.

**Welcome to my fucked up life.**

"It's your turn to take control." I said huskily lowering my pants so Bella could have access to me.

She blushed at my half naked form, trying not to look at my hard dick.

"What?" She asked in a frail voice.

The fear was clear on her face. Most women jumped at the opportunity. Bella had lots to learn if she planned on getting anywhere in the romance department. You can't just let prospects pass you by, you have to take them. Otherwise, you will learn nothing and get nowhere.

"You're going to be on top this time." I voiced, letting myself get in a comfortable position, before rolling on a condom.

Bella looked down at me and my dick warily.

"But I never…" Bella gulped uneasily.

"I know." I voiced amused, seeing her scared expression.

Bella looked ready to bolt. It was quite humorous to see a woman act this way around me, timid to touch me. It was usually the other way around. The women couldn't keep their hands off me, while I cringed at their freaky request. Sex on the couch was pretty innocent compared to where I have had sex before. However to innocent Bella I was pushing the envelope. I was curious how far I could actually push Bella before she broke. By the look on her face it, it didn't look like I could push her much farther. I would have to ease her into this.

"It's not that hard, I'll help guide you." I said reaching out for her jeans.

I keep my eyes on hers while I worked on her jeans. Clients often found eye contact sexy and plus I wanted Bella to know she could trust me. Bella bit her lower lip again, digging deep into it. I started to worry if she didn't stop she would make her lip bleed. It wasn't long that the sound of her jeans followed by her underwear hitting the floor filled the air. Bella let out a breath knowing she was part bare to me, but I didn't dare look down knowing that would only make her more uncomfortable. Instead, I leaned forward taking one of her hands in mine, giving it a light squeeze. She calmed down a little after that.

I was grateful, I wasn't sure how much more tricks I had up my sleeves to ease her anxiety. I lightly pulled her hand forward, silently telling her to straddle me. Shockingly she did as directed; placing her hands awkwardly on the cushions beside us, making sure no part of her was touching my hard on. I smirked at her innocent ways.

"Bella put your hands on the top of the couch, near my shoulders."

My smirk widen as she did as told without hesitation.

"Good. Do you feel that Bella, do you feel what you do to me?" I asked huskily, raising my hips off the couch a little bit so that my dick was lightly touching her wetness.

She let out a gasp in surprise; the look of lust clouded her eyes. I used her lust dazed state to my advantage gripping her waist. I guided my dick inside of Bella slowly; wanting to be gentle knowing this was only her second time having sex.

**Shit, she's tight.**

I tightened my grip on her hips, wanting desperately to slam into her. I had to keep reminding myself this was Bella's time to take control, not to mention she was too fragile for anything too rough.

"Ready?" I nearly panted, feeling the tightness of Bella's body already getting to me.

**Shit, if I don't get control of myself I won't be lasting very long.**

Bella closed her eyes enjoying the feeling. She gave a slow nod that she was ready to begin. I started her off slowly, moving my hips against hers, letting her get comfortable enough to take the reins. I found myself panting pretty quickly.

**Damn, why does this feel so good?**

**Fuck, Bella's body is swallowing me whole.**

Her pussy constricted around my dick with every move I made, leaving me dazed and panting for more. Finally after a couple of thrusts, Bella started to move her hips. I stopped moving mine, letting her have all the control. I watched Bella move her body, more and more on me, as a couple whimpers escapes her sweet lips.

I loved Bella's mouth. I would never tell her that, but a part of me ached to press my lips a pond hers again. I yearned to feel the softness they possessed, to taste her natural sweetness. I kept my lips at bay, not wanting to add to the confusion that was already in our partnership. I never kissed my other clients, and after all, Bella was a client of mine.

I waited as long as I could before I brought Bella down hard on me unable to take anymore of her torturous pace. I let out a groan at the feeling, letting my hips meet Bella's. She got the hint picking up her speed, moving faster. Bella's hands that were once loosely holding on the couch were now gripping it for dear life as she bounced freely on my dick.

The shy Bella I knew was out the door and the confident, sexy vixen was back.

"Yeah, fuck, just like that." I panted unable to hold back, pushing her closer to me, not wanting the pleasure I was feeling to end.

I don't know what it was, but there was something about Bella that drove me crazy. I wasn't sure if it was out of frustration or want. It drove me nuts that Bella would act shy one minute around me and then turn into this confident, sexy woman the next. It drove me nuts when Bella wanted to find out more about me even when I repeatedly told her I was a closed book. Somehow she was able to get me to open up around her. It confused me that Bella could make me feel so good physically, better than anyone I ever slept with. Everything about Bella drove me up a wall and the scary part was I liked it. She was the only client I couldn't wait to see; the only one I wanted to see.

Bella moaned out loud, working hard to reach her release. Her noises were driving me crazy. I let out a grunt feeling that familiar feeling in the pit of my stomach as Bella cried out her release. I followed shortly after.

Once calmed down Bella reopened her eyes in shock. As if she was surprised sex could be pleasurable.

"Wow, does it always feel this good, sex I mean?"

I had to laugh at her child like ways. She looked truly fucked. Her hair was coming out of her hair tie, her shirt was all wrinkled and rearranged and she had a huge grin on her face.

"Uh, it depends on how skillful the person is your sleeping with and it helps if it's someone you care about, sometimes." I answered honestly.

"I can't wait to try that again." Bella confessed.

I snickered at the little vixen I created, giving her neck a small kiss.

"You know our times not up, all you have to do is ask." I said huskily, not minding the idea of having sex again with Bella.

"No, I mean in real life, when I get a boyfriend." She announced, causing me to frown, suddenly feeling like a sex toy.

"If it feels this good having plain sex, I wonder what making love feels like." Bella thought out loud.

Her eyes suddenly turned to me questioning, as if I knew all the answers.

"I wouldn't know." I stated distantly, feeling like our time together was over.

I gently moved Bella off me, taking my used condom off and pulling my pants up. I throw the condom away and zip myself up turning back to face a confused Bella.

"What about Erica?" She questioned from her spot.

Now it was my turn to be the fragile one. Bella was scared and new when it came to sex and I was afraid and inexperienced when it came to anything emotional. We were complete opposites of that aspect.

"We broke up." I stated fixing my wrinkled shirt.

"What, are you okay, I mean what happened?" She asked completely stunned.

"I told her what I did for a living and she asked me if I loved her."

"What did you say?" Bella asked, on the edge of her seat still half naked.

I didn't want to go back into this cycle we were creating. I couldn't open up to Bella like I once had, it wasn't right. It wasn't right to her and it wasn't right to me. I gave enough of myself in this job; I wanted some privacy, to keep a part of me, to me.

"Can we not go into this please?" I asked nicely, silently hoping she would understand.

"Sorry, just tell me next time to stop talking and I will. I was just curious, that's all." She said, blushing in embarrassment.

I let out a sigh, about to tell her, she shouldn't be sorry. That it was my fault for opening up to her in the first place, when she began to speak again.

"I actually have a favor to ask." Bella said, I could see the determination in her eyes.

Something told me I was not going to like what I was about to hear. I silently prepared myself for what Bella could possibly ask of me.

"What kind of a favor?"

"Can you teach me how to act on a date?" She asked nervously.

"Come again?" I questioned in shock.

There were many things that ran through my mind as far as what Bella's request would be, but that was definitely not one of them.

"You see, I have this date and I don't know what the proper protocol is." Bella voiced noticing my surprise.

I nearly laughed at her words. She made dating sound like hard work.

**Wait, she has a date, and she wants me to guide her?**

I mentally groaned at the thought.

**I hope she doesn't expect me to meet the dude, or sit with them on their date. That would just be weird.**

**Wait, am I actually considering this?**

**I could do this. **

**Yes, I could be her teacher. **

**Lord knows she needs the help.**

**This would be a good way to reset the boundaries between us again. **

I gave a small smile, trying to ease her recent stress, before taking a seat next to her on the couch.

"Ah, first thing first, you might want to get dressed. You wouldn't want to make me hard again would you?" I asked teasingly, loving the blush that filled her cheeks when she realized she was still uncovered.

Bella worked quickly pulling her underwear and pants back up, looking mortified. I wanted to let her know there was nothing to be ashamed of, that sex was a natural, great thing. However, that would have to wait for another time. She asked me for advice and I was going to help her out the best that I could.

"Okay, well there are a lot of ways to turn on and turn off a guy, but I'll just go through the basics with you."

Bella nodded excitedly, eager to hear my professional advice. I may have been experienced in the bedroom but when it came to dates, not so much. I knew what I liked and didn't like, I couldn't speak for other guys though.

"You want to show confidence, smile and give eye contact to your date. Guys like a woman who is comfortable in her own skin and feeling like an equal instead of feeling intimidated. Another turn on would be a woman who takes chances. Men like woman who are willing to try new things, and don't worry about the consequences. Add a little Mystery. Guys like women that are hard to figure out. It makes things interesting. You want to be emotionally open but not too open, just enough to lure him in, but not enough for him to be able to figure you out. Also, Flirting is a good turn on. The guy wants to know you're into him. It's a thrill to get little hints as opposed to a kiss or straight out telling the guy you like him. A bat of an eye, a small touch of a hand and witty comments work well. You want to leave him begging for more."

Bella sat quietly, absorbing everything I told her as if it was the most important thing ever.

"Now, as far as turn offs go, the most important one is to not be clingy. You want to show interest but not too much on the first date. Guys hate needy girls; it makes them come off as desperate and unappealing. Second, don't pretend to be something you're not. It's misleading and a disappointment when the guy realizes he fell for the fantasy you created, rather than for you. Lastly, don't act nervous. If a girl acts nervous on a date it's going to make the guy nervous and that's no fun. You want the date to have a calming environment not stressful."

I watched as Bella started to get up from the couch. I grabbed her arm, stopping her.

"Where are you going?" I asked curious.

"I have to get a pen and paper to write all this stuff down, so I don't forget." Bella answered in a rush.

I was worried I might have done more damage than help. I could actually picture Bella studying everything I said on sheets of paper, as if she was studying for a test. I didn't want Bella to think she had to act a certain way to win a guy over. She needed to realize she was fine just the way she was.

"The most important thing, Bella, is to be yourself. The guy has to accept you for you, after all."

"Right." She replied automatically, as if she wasn't really listening to my thoughts on the subject.

I frowned seeing that Bella was going to do what she wanted to do in the end, no matter what I said. She was her own person; she could make her own judgment calls. She would have to learn from her own mistakes.

**Why do I care what she does anyway?**

**Why does the idea of someone else touching Bella suddenly bug me?**

**It's not like she's my Bella.**

I was so distracted in my thoughts I didn't even realize Bella left the couch until I heard a plump sound indicating that she was sitting back down again. I looked over at her seeing she was indeed making notes. Now, I was annoyed.

**Does my opinion mean nothing to her?**

**Why does she look so excited over this?**

**What's so damn great about a date?**

**What if she doesn't want to see me again after this?**

**What if she's tired of me?**

I silently thought to myself, could I handle never seeing Bella again if she chose to end our arrangement? A month ago I would have said no problem, but now, it was scary how attached I grown to this girl and what's worst, now I would have to share her.

* * *

**Note: **I just want to thank Wendy aka Twilight44 again for all the help and great questions, without her help, these chapters would not be what they are today. Review! ;)


	13. Loving oneself

**BPOV**

I started to make key notes for my date when Edward snatched my notepad out of nowhere. I was about to question him but he spoke before I could.

"Come on." He said getting off the couch and offering his hand to me.

"Where are we going?" I asked unsure.

"You want to be date ready, right?" He challenged.

I nodded eagerly taking his hand as he led us to the bathroom. I looked around questioning, wondering why we were in there.

"There is one more thing you need to learn before your date and that is self-acceptance. I noticed your uncomfortable showing your body. It's important that you are happy in your own skin, especially in a relationship where you are going to be showing off your body to someone else. That is what we are going to work on right now."

I nodded again still not understanding why we were in the bathroom.

"Get undressed." Edward commanded before turning on the shower.

That was the moment it suddenly hit me, he wanted us to go in the shower, together.

**Oh god, we're not having sex in the shower are we?**

I started to panic a little, Edward took notice.

"Relax Bella, nothing sexual will take place, you have my word. I just want you to be completely comfortable with your body as well as a man's body."

**Oh god, we're going to be completely naked!**

Edward has never really had a chance to see me naked. My first time with him, I think he was more worried about pleasing me than looking at what I had to offer and even if he did see all of me, it was two weeks ago. Surly, my body is out of his mind by now considering all the women he sleeps with on a daily basis.

It worried me because in the shower there was nowhere to hide.

**That's the point Bella, duh!**

**I don't know if I'm ready for this.**

**However, Edward seems to think I am and I trust him.**

Though I was hesitant, I started to undress, reaching for my shirt, seeing Edward already started.

I loved watching Edward undress. I don't know what it was, but it was so sexy, seeing his muscles ripple as he pulled his shirt over his head and watching his strong hands work on his pants, unbuckling his belt. The anticipation of all of it, knowing what was hiding underneath.

I quickly undressed not wanting to make him wait, as well as not wanting to draw attention to my less than prefect body.

After we were both completely nude Edward open the sliding glass door for me to get in. The steam from the hot water circulated the bathroom as we both entered the shower. Edward closed the door behind him, trapping us in the small space.

I glanced down at Edward's god-like body, noticing he had a semi hard on before quickly averting my eyes.

"It's okay to look. I don't mind, I'm use to it." Edward announced, smirking confidently at his physique.

I couldn't help but blush, feeling somewhat like a pervert checking him out.

" Okay, I want to try something with you, I'm going to ask you what you like and dislike about yourself, just to see where you think you need improvement and what you are happy with, okay?"

I nodded in return as Edward continued.

"Okay, we are going to go into this gradually, so let's start with something you don't like about me, and go from there."

I chewed on my bottom lip, thinking about Edward's looks as well as mannerisms, not able to find a con. He was prefect.

"Nothing." I said honestly.

Edward's smirk grew in amusement.

"Surely, there is something you don't like about me?"

"Well, I don't like that you're so emotionally cut off. I can never tell if you're being real or pretending with me."

"I don't have to pretend with you Bella." He confessed.

I felt my cheeks filling with color from his words.

**He doesn't have to pretend with me but that doesn't mean that he doesn't pretend with me.**

**Wait, what does that mean?**

**Does that mean Edward feels emotionally attached to me or just that he doesn't feel the need to lie to me?**

**Maybe I'm reading too much into this.**

**I wish he would be clearer with his remarks.**

I kept going over Edward's comment in my head, perplexed on the meaning of his words, when he started listing a con of mine.

"I dislike the fact that you felt the need to hire a professional. Bella you're a great girl. I'm sure there are many guys that would want to date you. Case in point, you have a date this week."

I took in Edward's words thinking them over. Sure, I had a date but I would have never had a date if it wasn't for my friend, Alice's meddling. I didn't know how to get a guy interested, what's worst; I didn't know how to keep a guy interested. I still had quite a bit to learn.

"Now, tell me something you like about me."

That was easy. There were tons of things I liked about Edward. The hard part was just picking one.

"I like the way you make my body feel." I said avoiding Edward's eyes, afraid of what he would think of my comment.

"Bella, why are you looking down? I'm right here. Say it to me, not the floor." He instructed.

I took a deep breath calming my nerves, before meeting his gaze.

"I like the way you make me feel."

"Good, you're supposed to." He teased, showing he wasn't upset with my little step back.

"I like that you're real. You don't hide who you are. That's a rare thing to find in my field. I can't tell you how many fake people I've met doing what I do." Edward admitted.

**What makes me so different?**

**Is it because I'm shy?**

**Is it because I'm inexperienced?**

**What?**

"Okay, now how about a dislike about yourself."

**Oh god, where do I start?**

"I don't like that I'm so shy." I stated, knowing my shyness was one of the big limitations holding me back from having a normal life.

"Well, you're making fine progress." Edward praised.

I wasn't really thinking about it, but I guess he was right. I mean I never thought I would have the strength to be fully nude in front of someone, and here I am naked in front of this god-like creature and answering questions to boot.

"I don't like that I have to pretend to be something I'm not for my job. I wish I could be me. I don't like that I always have to please everyone, just once, I would like to be the one pampered."

I frowned at Edward's confession. It was like he was a slave to his job.

**It must be hard to have to do what other people want, no questions asked, no disagreeing.**

It made me sick to think women could treat someone as if they were a robot, with no wants or needs of their own.

"Now it's your turn. What do you like about yourself?" Edward asked trying to lighten the mood.

"I like that I know who I am, not many people do." I answered.

"True, that is a nice quality to have." Edward agreed.

"How about physically, what do you like about yourself?"

"I like my eyes. Their mine, no one else has my eyes. They show my individuality." I stated.

"Good answer. Umm, I like that am able to support myself. It wasn't easy but I went from being broke to being successful. As for physical, I like my hair." Edward declared.

I had to laugh at that; out of everything on his killer body he liked his hair best. I wasn't expecting that answer, I thought maybe he would say his toned abs or smile.

Edward went on explaining his answer as I continued to laugh.

"It's my signature mark and no one has hair like me." He stated proudly.

"That's true." I giggled.

"Okay, now we're going to try a more hands on approach. I want you to touch me." Edward commanded.

My eyes widen in shock. I wasn't expecting him to be so blunt. I tried to calm myself down remembering Edward said we weren't going to have sex.

"Where?" I asked nervously, hoping he wasn't going to ask me to touch his dick.

**I know I'm not ready for that.**

**Not to mention it's growing every time I look down at it.**

**He's not expecting me to jerk him off is he?**

"Anywhere you want. I won't push you. I just want you to touch some part of my skin." He informed.

I eyed his built stomach, reaching my shaky hand out to graze the skin there. His skin was tight and soft.

"Good, keep going until it becomes second nature to you. Try not to think, just feel." Edward instructed.

I ran my hands across his built form admiring him up close and personal. I started at his abs, moving up to his chest and shoulder blades. Edward closed his eyes while I caressed his skin. I wasn't sure if it was to make me feel less intimidated, not having him stare at my every move or if he truly liked the sensation.

Edward let out a sigh as I traced his lips with one of my fingers. The caress only lasted a few minutes but Edward was right. Touching him did help calm me down. I wasn't even worried if I was touching him right or wrong, too hard or too soft. I just enjoyed the feel of his wet skin beneath my fingertips.

Once I was sure I covered all of his skin, excluding his dick, which was now pretty stiff. Edward turned around to let me explore his backside. I took my time drawling lines on his muscular back with my fingers, following his curves down towards his firm ass, without actually touching it.

As soon as I was done I stood back giving Edward room to face me. He slowly reopened his eyes and smiled.

"My turn." He announced.

I gulped nervously. Edward noticed grabbing both of my hands, giving them a squeeze.

"Hey, there's nothing to be scared of. I won't touch you anywhere you don't want to be touched, okay?"

I nodded unable to form words. Edward let go of my hands and I took the same approach as he had, closing my eyes. It was exciting and calming at the same time. It made me feel like I was alone, safe. Yet, it was thrilling and a little scary to know I was about to get touched and not know when or where.

Edward began at my hands, obviously knowing by now what calmed me down. He slowly made his way up my arm giving it a gentle massage as he went. It actually felt quite nice. He did the same with my other arm, loosening my muscles before traveling to my stomach. He gave it a light caress as if just to see if he could. Next, his hands were on my legs. I thought it was an odd choice to go to but Edward proved me wrong working his magic as he rubbed from my calves up to my lower thighs.

"Turn around." He breathed against my ear when he was back to my level.

I did as told feeling Edward's hands moving back and forth between rubbing my shoulders and rubbing my back. I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding, enjoying the feeling of his strong hands working out the kinks in my body.

It felt so good. The mixture of warm water cascading down my skin and the feel of Edward's skillful hands was enough to make me sleepy.

"Am I going to have to carry you to your bed?" Edward teased, noticing my sunken form.

Though his offer was tempting, I didn't want to embarrass myself any more than I already had.

"No, I can walk." I mumbled.

Edward snickered against my ear, halting his movements.

"Come on, that's enough for today." He voiced, turning off the shower.

My eyes fluttered open to be faced with the tiled wall. I turned to face Edward as he opened the door, helping me out before handing me a towel to wrap around myself.

I watched in a daze as Edward quickly dried himself before putting his clothes back on. I went to do the same when he stopped me, taking my clothes from me.

"No you don't. I have an overnight assignment for you." He stated, now fully dressed, while I remained in just a towel.

**Homework, really?**

**What am I, back in school again?**

"I want you to sleep naked tonight. It might sound weird but it's a big help when it comes to being comfortable with your body and it feels quite nice. It's a good way to relax yourself. Some people actually think its erotic, to feel the sheets on their bare skin."

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I couldn't believe what I was doing, much to my discomfort on the topic of being more open sexually, I agreed to Edward's little assignment. I eyed my room as if someone was watching even though Edward was long gone and I was all alone.

After pulling back my sheets and turning the light off, I quickly removed my towel, getting into bed. I raised my thin sheets around my naked body, gasping at the sensation.

The feeling of the ceiling fan lightly blowing air felt like someone breathing on my naked skin. The friction of the silky sheets rubbing against my breast caused my nipples to harden. The sheets wrapped in between my legs, teasingly.

I closed my eyes trying hard to sleep but finding it difficult to concentrate on anything except the feeling my sheets were creating. Edward's words kept popping into my head. "Try not to think, just feel." I found myself panting and wet between my legs.

**Oh my god, I'm freaken aroused!**

I was so confused; I couldn't understand how such an innocent touch could become so exciting. I moved my leg apart, sliding my ass against the mattress, letting a little whimper out in response. I never touched myself and never had a need to. But suddenly I was desperate with need, wishing I knew how, wishing I had the courage to try, even if I did know how.

Anxious for relief I did the only thing I could think of. I gripped my sheets in my hands bringing them up to brush against my wetness. Shockingly, it was working. It felt pleasing. I started to move my hips up against the sheets, steadily pushing up faster in time. While letting out low moans as my heart pounded away in my chest.

"Yeah, yeah, oh god, ah!" I cried out reaching my climax.

**Fuck, I have to take Edward's advice more often.**

As I calmed down from my high, I couldn't help but wonder if Edward was getting off himself, his dick was pretty hard when he left.

**I wonder why he didn't want to fuck again.**

I moaned at the thought, wishing Edward had stayed. Suddenly wondering why I was so against having sex in the shower to begin with. Wishing desperately I could take back what I said.

I let out a frustrated groan realizing I wouldn't see Edward for another week. It was getting harder and harder waiting to see Edward each week.

**Fuck, I don't think I can do this anymore.**

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**Note: **Review! ;)


	14. Fantasies

**Note: **Before you guys read this chapter I just want to pre-warn you. There is a mention of a rape fantasy, so, if your sensitive on that topic, don't read.

It's more about talking about a rape fantasy than actually acting out a rape scene. However, I just wanted to state that just in case anyone gets offended. Thanks again for reading. I'm loving all the comments I'm getting, keep them coming. Special thanks to Wendy again, for taking time away from her life to help me out. I really appreciate your help. ;)

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**EPOV**

I was hard and straining by the time I got home. Sure, I could have fucked Bella again but that wouldn't have helped her with her current dilemma of body acceptance. I wanted her to really think about what her body said to her and why she was so against it. Have her learn to love herself the way she was.

I headed to the shower.

**Ah, the shower, why did I have to choose the shower for our session?**

My dick grew with need thinking of the naked Bella I left to explore her naked self.

I leaned against the shower wall as I began to pump myself. I closed my eyes picturing Bella, naked in front of me, remembering her teasing caresses against my skin, picturing Bella's soft hand jacking me off instead of my own.

"Uh." I groaned, moving my hand faster, urgent for release.

Next, Bella's mouth popped into my head. It was bliss just kissing her sweet lips; I could only imagine what it would be like to feel her lips on my throbbing dick. That thought alone was enough to set me off.

"Fuck!" I called out cumming on the tiled wall and floor.

I couldn't believe Bella couldn't see all she had to offer. Sure she was shy, but she could work on that, and sure she was inexperienced but with the right guidance she could be turned into a sexy goddess.

Bella's breasts are about a mid-b which is what I personally prefer, with D's, there is too much to grip and there is not enough to grab with an A cup. Her breasts are just the right amount.

Her body has curves; you wouldn't think someone with a slender form like Bella would have curves nor that she would cover them up.

Her hips are curvaceous, sexy, and feminine.

Bella's legs are long, lean, and great for wrapping around a waist.

In addition, her ass is small and round. I actually think it's rather cute.

Bella's eyes are beautiful. I have to agree with her, they are one of her best features.

I love her plump lips; they silently beg to be touched.

Most of all, I love Bella's soul. She is beautiful inside and out, I just hope one day she will realize that.

I loved learning new things about Bella. And I learned a lot so far, without her even telling me. Bella's face is quite expressive. It's not hard to see what she's feeling.

I learned Bella is afraid to take chances but willing when guided through.

I learned Bella loves my curvy back, just by the time she spent admiring it, making detailed lines.

The note taking showed that she is afraid to make a mistake, of not being perfect.

However, Bella is already imperfect. Her imperfections are what make her real, desirable.

I discovered that Bella's afraid of being sexually active, not because of the act but because she has to show her body off during the act.

I couldn't understand why Bella was so concerned about the way she looked. I guess not having people find a person desirable over the years could have the same effect as people actually telling that person they are undesirable.

Bella likes the idea of a boyfriend but has no clue what that entitles.

She is afraid to voice her wants, scared of being rejected or criticized.

The thought of touching me both thrilled and scared her. It's hard to tell which emotion is going to win, but it's usually the one she is more comfortable being, scared.

I wish I could just shake her and tell her there's nothing to be scared of, that it's just her and me, when we're together.

Bella thinks with her head too much, she needs to think with her pussy for once.

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**BPOV**

"Hi." Edward smiled in the door way, once again in his casual wear.

"Edward, what are you doing here? It's Tuesday." I stated, wondering if perhaps he forgot what day it was.

It could have been that I was wrong, except I wasn't. I knew for a fact that it was Tuesday because tonight was my date with Jacob. It wasn't like Edward to forget what day we meet on but it was possible. He was human after all and people tend to forget things every once in a while.

"I know. I was in the area and curious to know how the assignment went."

"You know you could have just called, I'm sure your secretary has my number written down somewhere." I voiced starting to feel a little annoyed by his presence.

It was as if he thought I would drop everything I was doing just to see him. As if I had nothing going on.

**Well, I don't have anything going on, but that's not the point.**

**I hate that superior attitude of his.**

**It makes me feel inferior to him.**

"Call? That's a little cold, don't you think?" Edward argued, scrunching his face up in confusion.

I didn't answer. I didn't know why all of the sudden I was being so snippy, and from the looks of it neither did he.

**Maybe I'm going to start my period.**

**Maybe this is my way of pushing him away.**

"So, how did it go?" Edward asked, ignoring my recent mood swing.

"It was interesting."

"Interesting as in, you got off interesting?" He asked arching an eyebrow.

"Sort of."

"What is sort of, you either did or didn't, so which is it?"

"Well, I mean I came, but I never really, you know..." I trailed off, feeling like my naive, embarrassed self again.

"You never pleasured yourself before?" Edward asked in shock.

"No" I blushed.

"Bella, your twenty four, how is that even possible?"

"Virgin, remember?"

"Bella, I know about you being inexperienced in sex, but one should still know what pleases them and it's a little too late to still be calling yourself a virgin." Edward voiced amused.

I didn't like how Edward felt he could come over whenever he wanted. I didn't like the flutter my heart did whenever he came around. I didn't like that he was so concerned about my needs. I didn't like that I was falling for him.

**Soon Edward will be gone, focused on another client and where will that leave me? **

**Us? **

**If you could even say there is an Us.**

**I'm so confused.**

I didn't know how to label what we had. I felt like we were closer to each other than the average working client relationship. Maybe it was just me. I'm sure there were other clients that felt the same.

Maybe I was just another Jessica. I never picture myself being a needy, clingy person, but I felt strongly about Edward.

I wondered would I just become another Jessica. Could I sink so low as to stalk Edward? Could something happen to make me snap? I didn't want to find out, it was best not to know. Women like Jessica were who I worked hard to never become. I would rather be alone and have my pride and respect than become a needy, psycho stalker.

"I got an idea." Edward said, taking me from the thoughts.

I followed Edward as he led us to the living room.

"Undress."

Shockingly I did as told, as if it was an everyday thing for me. I was starting to get used to his commanding ways and being naked around him.

"I noticed you are more comfortable when you close your eyes. So, I'm going to try blindfolding you." Edward said before heading towards my room, leaving me in the living room.

**Where is he going?**

**Am I supposed to follow?**

**Why is he even doing this, it's not Wednesday?**

**I wondered if he's still planning on coming over tomorrow.**

He came back with a pillow case in his hand folding it in half before covering my eyes with it, tying it securely to my head. He helped guide me to the couch, telling me to lie down and get comfortable.

I felt the sofa sink down as Edward sat down beside me, still fully clothed.

"Now, tell me what a fantasy of yours is?"

"Umm, uh…" I trailed off nervously.

"Bella it's just me, you can tell me. I'm not going to think any less of you. It's perfectly normal to have fantasies." Edward soothed.

"Umm, well, sometimes…Ifantaizeaboutrape."

"Ah, the rape fantasy, that's a popular one. You really shouldn't feel ashamed. Many people have that one. Shoot, that's innocent to some of the freaky requests I've heard. I'm not big on freaky stuff, but some of my colleagues share stories with me about the strange things they have been asked to do, very dominant like stuff. Some women like to get there ass spanked, others like being tied up while getting worked up with toys, not allowed to cum until told. I don't believe in using toys. I'm old fashioned, I prefer to use my dick and honestly, if you can fuck right you don't need toys. I haven't gotten a complaint yet."

I blushed deeply at his straight forward reply.

"I don't really fantasize about being raped, just, I don't know, I like how one person has the control over the other and is very direct and passionate, it's sexy." I voiced, feeling the need to explain myself, not wanting Edward to think I was a freak like the others.

"Like this?" Ed asked huskily as he restrained my hands above my head, holding them in place.

I nodded.

"Like this?"

He began to kiss and nibble on a sensitive area on my neck.

I gasped; surprised at the great sensation it gave me. It made me feel desirable and alive.

**How does he always know just where to touch me?**

"And this?" Edward questioned, grinding his hard on into my lower body as he continued his attack on my neck.

I moaned, unable to hold back.

"Tell me what you want Bella. Where do you want me to touch you?" His smooth voice whispered in my ear.

A shiver ran down my spine at his words, at his hot breath tickling my skin and in anticipation.

"Umm, wherever?" I replied, trying to calm my hurried heart rate.

"Uh-uh, that's not gonna work. I want to hear you say it, out loud." Edward demanded.

**Why is it so hard to say?**

**I know what I want, but I can't just say touch my vagina Edward, that's not very ladylike.**

"I, I want, I, I'm fine." I sighed frustrated.

"Bella, you're not fine. How do you expect to get anywhere if you never voice what you want?" Edward asked annoyed.

"Hope?" I joked or at least tried to, wanting to get rid of some of the tension that now lay between us.

**Edward is right. **

**How do I expect my future boyfriend to know what I want, if I never say anything?**

I took a deep breath before blurting it out.

"I want you to grope my breasts, squeeze my ass and pleasure my vagina." I said in one breath, blushing crimson red immediately after.

**Did I really just say that?**

Edward chuckled at my requests.

"Is that all? He teased.

I nodded unable to voice anymore.

"Okay, where should I start?" he asked.

**Is he trying to kill me?**

"Wherever you think is best." I replied.

"I'll let that one slide considering the progress you made." Edward stated.

It became quiet, still.

I started to wonder if he was still there, and then, I felt his hands slide across my bust. I whimpered at his gentle touches as he began to massage my breasts, one in each hand. My nipples hardened under his palms. His hands were soft, warm and skilled. It lasted a few minutes; next he slid his hands to my sides, instructing me to lift my lower half. I did as told and he squeezed my ass. I squealed in delight. It was so sensual, him massaging my ass with his method of squeeze, release, squeeze and release. It gave me goose bumps.

Edward noticed my excitement and added a little grind of his dick to the mix, changing his technique to, squeeze, grind, release, squeeze, grind and release. I was in heaven. I could already feel myself getting wet. Afterwards, his hands traveled towards my long awaited vagina. I cried out as a single finger slid into me.

"Bella, I barely touched you and you're already soaked." Edward continued to tease.

I gripped the sofa cushion tightly in my hands, I was sure my knuckles were turning white from my hold. I let out moan after moan as Edward started to move his finger around, rubbing against my sensitive skin, adding an additional digit after I got used to the feeling.

I whimpered feeling Edward's warm, wet mouth on my breasts, licking, sucking and giving gentle bites as he worked his fingers in me.

"Uh, yeah, mmm."

"You like that?" Edward asked huskily, between his licks, twisting his fingers at an angle trying to spur me on.

"Ohh, yeah, uh, oh god, right there." I panted out when Edward found my g-spot.

It wasn't long that I felt my walls clenching around his long fingers, and I found myself crying out my release.

I took deep breaths trying to calm myself down from my incredible high. I knew Edward was smirking even though I was blindfolded. I'm sure he was proud of himself, to be able to trigger such a response from me. Before I knew it a sob escaped my mouth, and my lips were trembling.

"Bella?" Edward questioned, quickly removing the blindfold from my eyes, as a tear slide down my cheek.

Edward's once smug expression turned concerned as a couple more tears fell.

"Bella what's wrong, did I do something wrong, did I hurt you? Bella you should have spoken up and told me if something didn't feel right." He went on with his worry.

"No, no, that's not why I'm crying. It just, I never felt the kind of pleasure I feel when I'm with you." I lied.

It wasn't a complete lie, I mean, Edward did give me pleasure like I never felt before but that's not why I was crying.

"Wow, that's the first time I got anyone to cry, I must not be losing my touch." He said with a laugh, taking the compliment.

I couldn't tell Edward why I was really crying.

**I 'm crying because it has taken me twenty four years to feel anything emotionally.**

**I'm crying because I know I could never have Edward all to myself.**

**I'm crying because, I just realized I love him.**

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**Note: **Review pretty please! ;)


	15. Why I'm so fucked up

**Note: **In this chapter you will get a little taste of what Edward's primary clients are like as well as more of an understanding of Edward's job and how he started off. I mention Jane in this chapter also. Since Jane doesn't have a last name in the Twilight series, I made one up. Her name will be Jane Watson for this story. Bella will be back in the next chapter.

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**EPOV**

After I got Bella off, I headed home to get ready for my scheduled client of the day. I took a quick shower, making sure to shave any stubble that had grown on my face overnight as well as cleaning up my private area, shaving any outgrown hairs. I made sure I was properly groomed and clean before heading to my closet to pick out a fresh, sharp looking suit to wear.

As I started to put on my expensive, hunter green suit, I couldn't help but think back to how I started out in this field. How I ended up where I am today.

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Before Escorting I was working at a local restaurant as a busboy, making minimum wage. I started at age eighteen while I was still in high school, and saved every penny I could just to pay for college. Unfortunately, my parents never set aside money for my education, so, it was all up to me to make it happen. It was a struggle juggling school work and my job but I did what I had to do.

I graduated high school at age nineteen though it wasn't till I was twenty five that I actually had enough money saved to go to college.

I lived on the college campus with my roommate Emmett. The rent was about seven hundred dollars which was basically a month's worth paycheck. I was broke as they come, just barely making it by.

I started considering living off campus to save some money. A girl in one of my classes told me she was actually looking for a roommate to live with. I wasn't excited about the thought of living with a girl, but once she told me the low price of five hundred dollar she was asking for, I was all ears. Maggie was her name.

I came by to check on the apartment and it was really great. It was a gated community and very upscale. I couldn't believe the deal I was getting. Maggie told me the rent was originally going to be one thousand but she split it in half. Since she came from a rich family and her parents were paying for her education, she could afford paying more on her own. She said she wanted to help me out and I really appreciated it.

Everything was working out, until, she raised the rent.

"I can't afford this price Maggie; I'm barely making ends meet as it is."

"Well, you could always go back to your old roommate." She said heartlessly.

"No, I can't, Emmett already has a new roommate. I have nowhere to go." I stressed, running a hand through my wild hair.

"I think we can work out a deal." She replied mischievously, eyeing my body with hungry eyes.

Maggie ended up bribing me with sex. The deal was I would be able to live with her rent free as long as I slept with her whenever she was horny. I agreed, not having any other options at the time.

Later on she introduced me to Jessica, who became my unofficial first client. Jessica was a friend of hers. She was another rich, spoiled girl, who took things for granted.

I couldn't live with Maggie forever as her sex toy. I refused to be dependent on someone like that. So, after I worked up enough courage, I asked Emmett for the address of his friend's Escort agency.

I was amazed how classy and professional it looked. I feared it would end up being a dirty shack in the middle of nowhere, having workers with a hygiene problem, wearing barely there outfits. I couldn't have been more wrong or relieved for that matter.

The agency was inside of a big, decent conditioned building. The floors were spotless, it smelled pleasant and the employees wore dresses and suits. At first glance you wouldn't have thought it was a sex trade place but rather an everyday work office.

I headed over to the receptionist out in front, informing her I was there to see the head boss of the operation.

Her name was Jane Watson. She was in her mid-thirties and she was all about business. Jane had a baby doll face, blue eyes and dirty blonde hair. She may have looked sweet and innocent but that couldn't be further from the truth. She was a tough, successful, business woman who was to be taken seriously. She was intimidating.

Ms. Watson was busy going through her paperwork when I came in.

"Sorry to interrupt Ms. Watson but I have another one for you." Her secretary said letting me in the room.

"That's fine." She voiced not bothering looking up, gesturing for the lady to closed the door.

"Excuse me Ms. Watson; I'm here for try outs. I mean, I heard about this place and was interested in a job here." I stated nervously.

She looked up at me, bored.

"Strip." She ordered.

"Excuse me?" My eyes widen in shock, I wasn't expecting her to be so blunt.

"Come on, I need to see the goods. How do you expect to become an escort if you can't even show your body?" She argued.

"No, I can, I just thought this was a talking interview."

"It is, now strip."

I gulped nervously as I started to undress in front of her piercing stare. I felt exposed inside and out as my clothes hit the ground.

Jane leaned back in her chair deep in thought.

"How old are you?"

"Ah, twenty five."

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

"No, not at the moment."

"Good, girlfriends just get in the way. Trust me your better off without one." She stated getting up from her seat, coming closer.

My breathing quicken as she stopped just a foot away from me. She started to circle me like a shark about to attack, eying my body was she went.

"Very nice." She said, lightly grazing my ass.

A shiver ran through me. I was so disgusted with what I was turning into, what I was doing, selling my body for money. I never thought I would stoop so low.

I gasped as Jane's hand gripped my dick, rubbing it skillfully.

"Nice equipment, but does it work?" She questioned teasingly.

I felt so humiliated feeling myself get hard under a strangers touch. Jane smirked wickedly.

"Excellent." She praised before slowly backing away, heading back to her desk.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Now, you will need to get tested once a month. We do not allow diseased people in here."

"I understand." I said, feeling cold standing naked under an air vent.

"We also make sure our clients get tested as well." She added.

I nodded, relieved. The last thing I needed was to worry about contracting something.

"We will put you through a test run, have you have sex with one of our regulars and get their feedback on how you were. If they like you, you pass. If not, well, you get the idea."

"I understand. No problem."

"Good, you may go now. I'll have my secretary give you the information you will need on your way out."

"Thanks." I said quickly throwing my clothes on not wanting to waste anymore of her time, before heading out the door.

* * *

Back then, I started with only three clients and my asking price for sex was five hundred.

Right now, I make a thousand to two thousand a fuck and I have ten clients I am seeing. I know that doesn't sound like a lot but with the constant call backs, crazy request and different personalities, it is hard work.

It was not easy to bond with all those different types of women. They were all diverse. Some knew what they wanted and were very blunt. Several, liked to remain mysterious and wanted me to guess what they wanted. Others didn't know and it was up to me to find out.

The clients I got usually fitted between the ages of mid-thirties to late forties. I preferred the older women to the younger ones just because the older women were more detached. They were into my services just for the sex. The younger ladies wanted romance and were delusional in thinking I felt something for them.

* * *

Today I had Mrs. Sanders. Mrs. Sanders was a wife and mother of two young boys, at least according to the big rock on her ring finger and pictures around the house. Everything about her was fake, her personality, her boobs and her nails. I wouldn't be surprised if she had work on something else either. She was your basic 40ish, spoiled rich, lonely housewife with a lust for younger men.

I wasn't her first Escort and I doubt I would be her last. It was not uncommon for clients to want to change up their Escort every once in a while. Sample every chocolate in the box sort of speak.

After knocking on the huge, detailed door of the upscale house, I was greeted by Mrs. Sanders herself. She looked like a Barbie doll with her platinum blonde hair, blue eyes and red lipstick, only wearing a navy blue, silk robe. She wasn't unattractive, she had a decent looking face and was in pretty good shape for her age but she was far from my type.

She brought her manicured, hand up for me to kiss.

She made me do this every time I greeted her. It was her way of making it known who was in charge.

After I gave it a gentle kiss, she withdrew her hand and led the way. I silently followed as she headed towards the kitchen. I made it mid-way when she suddenly turned around, holding up her hand, signaling me to stop were I was.

"Crawl." She ordered.

My old self would have said fuck you and left with my pride.

Knowing Mrs. Sanders paid the big bucks and gave generous tips if you did everything up to her high standards, I sucked in a breath and got down on my knees and began to crawl over to her, trying to make it look seductive as I went. I stopped at her feet and waited for further instructions.

"Good." She praised, slowly untying her robe, letting it hit the ground, revealing her older body to me.

She had a pretty nice body for an older woman but you wouldn't mistake her body for a twenty year old. Her body showed her maturity with a couple of age spots on her arms, probably from too much tanning, a few stretch marks on her stomach, obviously from when she was pregnant and a little cellulite on her upper thighs and butt. The little grownup details were about the only thing real on her.

"Now, worship me." She demanded as if she was a queen in her own little fantasy world.

I moved up her legs, kissing the skin as I went, until I was at her eye level.

"What do you want Pet?"

I cringed at the little nickname she had given me. A reminder I was just a toy to these women.

What I wanted was to be free of all this bullshit. I wanted to be normal, like everyone else and have a normal job. I couldn't say that though. Mrs. Sanders meant sexually and she didn't mean what did I want, she meant what did she want. She was testing me to see if I paid attention to our past sessions together.

I knew she liked to order me around, she got off on it. My guess is that she probably didn't get much say in her marriage. Her husband wore the pants in their relationship or lack thereof. However, when it came to her sexual adventures with her many escorts she wore the pants.

"I want to fuck you against this counter top, hard and fast." I answered knowing Mrs. Sanders didn't go for anything sweet or gentle.

She probably liked sex fast and rough because her husband liked it gentle, because she was mad at her husband for always being away on business. Almost as if she did it to spite him.

Sometimes I thought I should have been a therapist. I was very good at observing people and listening to their needs.

"Very well." She stated, sounding please by my response.

She got into position bending over, giving me a good view of her ass and pussy, resting her hands across the expensive counter top. I quickly dropped my pants knowing she hated when I kept her waiting.

I looked down at my dick about to put on a condom when I realized I wasn't hard, not in the slightest. This never happened to me. I was always able to get hard for my clients.

I silently cursed as Mrs. Sanders sighed looking over her shoulder.

"Any day now Pet."

I closed my eyes trying to think of something to turn me on. Porn, no, girl on girl, no, Bella, I grew.

I silently congratulated myself but at the same time wondered if this would be a full time problem, me having a hard time getting my dick up or if it was just a fluke.

I waited till my dick was rock solid, straining for relief, before I put the condom on. I heard Mrs. Sanders let out a bored sigh as I position myself.

"Maybe I should have just pleasured myself." She bitched.

**Pleasure this!**

I slammed into her hard; the force thrusting her forward across the counter, causing friction between her big, silicon breasts and the hard, marble surface.

"Ah!" She screamed out in surprise as I continued to bang her senseless.

I was still half clothed; my pants were hanging by my knees, leaving my ass the only thing exposed. I gripped her hips bringing her body back to me as I plunged deep into her wet pussy.

"Yes, yes, just like that, harder." She carried on with her commands.

Suddenly her blonde hair became a chestnut brown and her grown up body became youthful, curvaceous and desirable.

"Fuck, yeah." I grunted out as the new images came to me.

I started to pant feeling my end near. I squeezed my eyes shut as I tried to bring Mrs. Sanders to her climax before me. She moaned out and even started caressing her own breasts in pleasure, but she showed no end in sight.

Sweat formed on my forehead, I was so close.

**Come on, cum already!**

**Fuck, I'm not gonna last much longer.**

Just as I was contemplating fingering her to help move the process along, my worst nightmare came true. The front door slammed shut and the sound of kids talking could be heard.

"Fuck, their early." Mrs. Sanders said panicked.

I quickly pulled out, stepping away from her working quickly on pulling my pants up as she worked on her robe. Two seconds later, the kitchen door opened to reveal her two young sons.

I worked fast taking off my jacket and placing it in front of my body to hide the tent in my pants.

"Mom, you'll never guess what happened at school today…" The smaller of the two said excitedly, before noticing me in the room.

"Who's this?" The other asked curious.

"Oh, ah, boys this is my new masseuse, Mr. Cullen."

I never felt as dirty as I did than, lying to a couple of kids. They were oblivious to their parents crippling marriage.

"Well, I better get going; I don't want to hold my other clients up." I stated.

"Right, umm, let me go get your check." Mrs. Sanders replied leaving me with her curious boys as she ran upstairs to get her bag.

"So, you're the new masseuse." The taller of the two stated.

"That's right." I replied awkwardly wanting to jet.

I almost felt like leaving without my paycheck, it was that awkward.

"I hope you're better than mommy's last masseuse, he always made her cry out in pain. Daddy didn't like him very much either."

**Shit, she fucked men while her kids were still in the house.**

**That's fucked up.**

"Here you go." Mrs. Sanders said coming back down, handing me my check. I glanced at the number in shock, five thousand dollars.

**Damn I'm good!**

**Of course five thousand is chump change to her.**

"I gave you a little incentive for the next time, considering we didn't really get to finish."

"Ah, thanks." I said kind of short, uncomfortable talking about such things in front of her kids even if they didn't know what we were doing.

"See you next time." I added, limping somewhat out of their massive home finding it difficult to walk in my condition.

I shamed my hard dick away as I got in my car.

**What ever happened to happy marriages?**

**Do they even exist anymore?**

**Did they ever?**

**And what the fuck was that earlier with my dick?**

**Why couldn't I get hard on cue?**

**Is my dick secretly trying to tell me something?**

**That I get so much pussy, it's protesting and needs a rest?**

**This is crazy; I'm talking about my dick as if it were a person.**

**A person that gets taken advantage of all the time and never gets the respect he deserves.**

**I need help.**

**Scratch off becoming a therapist; I need to see a therapist.**

**

* * *

**

**Note:** Wow, over 400 Reviews! Thank you for all your support, I never thought this story would reach this high. ;)


	16. The date

**Note: **I decided to update a little earlier this week. Usually I update over the weekend, but my birthday is coming up and my family and I are going to celebrate over the weekend, which makes this the only time I can update. Enjoy! ;)

* * *

**BPOV**

I decided to go on my date with Jacob. I mean who was I to say I was in love? Edward was the only person I have ever been with. How would I truly know that I loved him unless I tried other prospects?

Maybe I made myself think I was in love with him to stop myself from finding a potential boyfriend. Maybe I was scared to move forward, scared of change.

Edward was safe; there was no potential relationship there. Maybe that was the appeal.

I mean honestly who could date someone with a job like Edward's, knowing that he touches and pleasures a number of women the same way he touches you?

Maybe it was lust I had for Edward. He was great at pleasuring, but I liked his personality too.

Though, friends have great personalities. So what makes the difference between Edward being a love interest or a friend?

**Argh, why does everything have to be so complicated?**

**Why do we make everything so hard?**

**Why can't we just say I like you, you like me, get together, bing, bam, boom, end of story?**

**Why are we so scared to truly speak our minds, afraid of consequences?**

**I guess because it's harder to recover when you fall.**

**When you let go, falling freely, only to find out there is no one there to catch you.**

I was deep in thought when the sound of my phone ringing brought me back to reality. It was already seven thirty. I was supposed to be meeting my date at nine, I wasn't even dressed yet and I just started my period, lucky me. It was as if Mother Nature was playing a cruel joke on me.

**There's nothing sexier than being on your period. **

**I get to rock the look of acne and a bloated stomach and be irritable for no reason what so ever. **

**What's not to love?**

I made a mental note to bring extra pads and Midol with me before grabbing the house phone.

"Listen whoever this is; you're going to have to make it quick. I have somewhere I have to be in exactly one hour and I'm not even dressed." I stressed, losing patience already.

"Hey Kiddo, it's your dad, I haven't heard from you in a while."

"Hey dad, sorry if I sounded a little snippy just then, I'm kind of in a rush."

I never see much of my parents; they divorced when I was ten. I lived with my dad until I was nineteen. Charlie lives in forks like me. He's a cop and works all the time so I hardly see him. Though sometimes he will call when he's bored or lonely asking me stupid random things like, if I'm I watching tv and what channel? Then he will start telling me what he's watching as if it is so fascinating; telling me when a sports game is on, even though I don't watch sports and Charlie knows this.

I guess this is his way of bonding with me. We didn't have much in common living together except a love for tv. I loved the television because it was an escape from reality and helped get rid of the awkward silence that usually filled the room. My dad loved it for sports.

"I didn't realize you were going out. So where are you going?" My dad asked curious.

"Oh, I have a date. His name is Jacob."

"Jacob, do I know this kid? What's his last name? Where did you meet?" Charlie interrogated me as if I was a criminal.

"Whoa, dad calm down. I'm your daughter remember, not a suspect." I stated.

**Jeez, if this is how he gets just hearing about a regular date, I could only imagine how he would react if he found out about Edward.**

I shivered at the thought.

That was another reason we couldn't be together, my father was a cop and if he found out Edward was Escorting he could totally bust him. I'm sure Edward would never want to see me again if that happened. I don't think my father would approve of a relationship with Edward either, if he knew what he did for a living.

"Sorry Bella, comes with the job. Seriously though, do you want me to do a background check on this guy? You never know if people are who they say they are. There are lots of frauds out there now a days." Charlie carried on.

"No dad, that's okay. It's just a date, I don't even know if it's going to go anywhere."

"Well, you know I'm here if you ever change your mind."

"Thanks dad, that's very reassuring. Have you heard from mom?" I asked wanting to change the subject.

"No, not since your graduation party." Charlie stated, sounding bored.

I guess I could say that was another thing my dad and I had in common, a lack of communication with my mother.

My mom, Renee, lives out of state. I never see her. She calls once a month for an update or emails me but we're not close. The big topic of our conversations is weather talk.

**Is it normal to be distant from both your parents?**

**I sometimes wonder if I was adopted, we so different.**

My mom likes going out and doing things, dressing up for events, being adventurous. Not to mention, she is dating a man closer to my age than hers, eww.

I know people say age doesn't matter when it comes to love, but you have to draw the line somewhere. Phil acts more immature than me and is four years older than me.

**I guess maturity doesn't come with age, you're either born with it or not.**

**

* * *

**

Once I finished my conversation with my father, I headed to my room to pick out an outfit. I didn't want to look like my usual self but I at the same time I didn't want to come off as trying too hard.

I ended up settling on wearing a simple, knee high, white dress with a black ribbon on the mid-section that you tie to make a bow. It was girly, sophisticated with a little bit of sex appeal thrown in. I quickly put on my only pair of black pumps I had and grabbed my purse heading out the door.

I chose to meet Jacob at the restaurant rather than have him meet me at my house. I was a little skeptical having a total stranger come to my place after the talk I had with my father about criminals.

I gave Alice a quick text to notify Jacob that I would meet him at the eatery. A restaurant with lots of people around was the much safer and smarter route to go. Not to mention, it took off some of the pressure of my first date jitters.

* * *

I made my way through the crowded restaurant, scanning the room around until my eyes landed on him.

A smile immediately spread to my face. He was hot, not as hot as Edward but then again I don't think anyone could reach Edward's sex appeal level.

He had short, jet black hair, deep brown eyes, caramel skin, muscles galore and the cutest smile ever.

I proceeded over towards his table, noticing his fashionable outfit. He was wearing a gray suit with a black dress shirt. Normally, I wouldn't think that combination would work on a guy, but he pulled it off, nicely.

"Hey, I'm Jacob." He said proudly, holding out his hand for me to shake.

I timidly took it in mine.

"Bella." I stated, looking down at the table rather than his eyes as I spoke.

I took my seat noticing a red rose by Jacob. I eyed it strangely, biting my lower lip out of nervousness.

"Oh, I almost forgot, this is for you." He voiced, handing the flower over to me.

"Thanks." I replied feeling awkward, placing it gently off to the side.

It was quiet for a good minute or two before I could find the strength to speak.

"So, Alice says we went to the same school. I'm sorry to say I don't recall seeing you, which is kind of strange because I would think I would remember going to school with someone like you. You're kind of hard to miss."

**Jeez, Bella could you be any more obvious?**

**You're supposed to be confident and mysterious, remember?**

"Yeah, umm, well, I didn't always look like this. I was actually scrawny growing up and got made fun of a lot for not being built like most guys my age were. So, I started working out and before I knew it I was more built then the jerks that bullied me." He confessed.

"Well good for you, it's great to see people overcome their obstacles." I praised.

"So, what about you? Last I saw you; you were hiding away in corner reading a book, at lunch. Have you overcome your obstacles?" Jacob asked intrigued.

**Reading a book a lunch, god, I'm such a nerd.**

"I'm still shy if that's what you mean, I don't really think I can change that."

**I'm sure I sound very appealing.**

**I can't imagine why I never had a boyfriend.**

"I think you improved. I mean, I never tried to talk to you before, but I'm sure if I did, you would have ran away." He said snickering.

"Hey, I wasn't that shy." I argued.

"Yeah, okay, whatever you say." Jacob replied still snickering.

"Okay, maybe your right." I retorted, giggling a little myself at the thought.

It was crazy to think how shy I used to be and it was crazy to think how much I have grown in such a short time, and I owed it all to Edward.

**What was it about Edward that made it so easy for me to open up to him?**

"So just out of curiosity, how's this date going so far?" Jacob asked.

"Good, I guess. I'm not the best judge when it comes to dates." I admitted.

"Yeah, me either, your only the fourth date I've ever been on. Pretty pathetic, huh?" He asked, anxious for my reply, as if he thought I would think he was a loser.

"No, it's not pathetic, it's sweet. I mean how many guys can claim that?" I challenged.

"Not very many." He stated.

We both laughed at that.

Suddenly I remember I was on my period and I was wearing white, not the best color to wear.

**Shit!**

"Excuse me, I have to use the bathroom, I'll be right back." I voiced, grabbing my bag.

"You're not going to jet on me, are you?" Jacob teased.

"No, I'll be back." I stated before making my way to the restrooms.

* * *

Thankfully, my dress was still white all the way around. I replace my pad, took a couple Midol just in case, and gave myself a look over in the mirror before heading back out.

**I like Jacob; he's really nice, down to earth and kind of sexy.**

**What more could you want?**

I walked in the direction of our table seeing the back of Jacob's head as I got closer. I looked off to the side, taking in my surroundings, when I saw him. I froze in my spot. There siting a couple rows to the side of our table, was Edward.

**What are the chances?**

**What is he doing here alone?**

**Who goes to restaurants alone?**

**Maybe he's not alone?**

I decided to go back to my seat before he saw me standing there, just staring at him.

"You came back." Jacob joked.

"Yes, I'm back." I stated, looking back over in Edward's location.

**Is he following me?**

**Did he know I was here?**

A part of me wanted to join Edward but at the same time a part of me didn't. Jacob was good company and I was on a date after all. Besides Edward was off duty, I doubt he wanted to be bugged. So, I decided to ignore his presence and listen to Jacob as he started to talk about only god knows what.

Every once in a while I found myself glancing back over towards Edward's table. I frowned seeing he was indeed dining alone. The weird thing was he didn't seem embarrassed or sad about it. He actually looked relaxed, like he liked being alone.

"You ready to go?" Jacob asked kindly after we both finished our meals.

"Yes, whenever you are." I replied, giving Edward's table one last look, only to find it empty.

* * *

I figured I would let Jacob walk me to my car, he seemed like a nice, gentleman, and it was getting quite dark outside. I had mace in my purse if I ever needed it thanks to my dad, but I never used it before and didn't want a reason to have to use it.

A shiver ran through me as the night air hit my bare arms.

"You okay?" Jacob asked, lightly rubbing his hands up and down the side of my arms, as if to heat them up.

"Yeah, thanks." I said as we waited in line for the valet parking.

Then I saw him again, what's worse, was he saw me too. Edward was literally standing only ten feet away from us, as he waited for his own car to be brought up. The shocked look on his features told me he didn't expect to see me there.

Seeing Edward, I panicked. I didn't want Jacob to know how we met. I took my ticket and keys from the valet, telling him I could get my own car, pulling Jacob with me.

* * *

It was a good fifteen minutes before I found my truck. I gave Jacob a friendly goodbye hug and we made plans to meet up again. I thought about kissing him at first, but then I worried if I kissed him he might want something more and I wasn't ready for that yet. Nor was I about to state I was on my period, how humiliating that would be.

* * *

By the time I got home, it was nearly midnight. I was tired and ready for bed.

**Who knew going out could be so exhausting?**

I changed into my pajama's pants and tank top, about to turn all my lights off and head to bed when there was a knock at my door. Actually it was more like a pounding noise. I quickly headed over thinking it must have been an emergency. I wasted no time opening the door, only to find a very pissed off Edward on the other side.

"Edward, what are you doing here, did you forget something?" I asked trying to hold my ground.

He barged through my door, slamming it on the way in.

"Who is he?" He demanded angrily, his eyes were darker, his eyebrows were furrowed and his posture was stiff.

I never had been so frighten in my life. This was not the sweet, sexy Edward I knew, this was a madman. I suddenly wished I had that can of mace in my hand.

Edward came over, backing me up into a corner. I had nowhere to run.

"M-my date." I stuttered.

"How come you failed to mention your date was today?" He questioned.

"I didn't think it mattered." I answered honestly.

**Since when does he care what I do on my free time?**

"And why did you walk away after seeing me, are you ashamed of me Bella? Do I embarrass you, selling my body for money?" He all but shouted.

**Where is this coming from and why does he care what I think of him?**

"No, I, Edward, I just thought you had better things to do then bother meeting Jacob. I mean it's not like you care about whom I date." I answered.

"Yeah, that's right, because I'm just a male whore." Edward shot back.

"I didn't say that."

"You don't have to say it, it's already out there."

I couldn't believe how little Edward thought of himself. How low these women made him feel and how I just became one of them, ignoring him as if he was nothing when the truth was he was so much more.

"Come on." Edward demanded harshly, his eyes showed nothing but hate, though oddly enough I don't think it was towards me.

"Where are we going?" I asked as Edward started to lead me down the hallway.

"Your bedroom." He stated coldly.

I stopped short about to voice that I was on my period but Edward didn't give me a chance. He took my actions as resisting and yanked me to move.

"Ow, that hurts." I protested, trying to wiggle my arm free, but that only angered Edward more.

"It's twelve o'clock, it's Wednesday. I'm officially your man whore, time for you to use me just like everyone else." He whispered in my ear, bitterly.

I never felt so cheap, so worthless.

Maybe he wanted me to feel what he felt every time he slept with someone.

However, all I could think was how he cheapened my feelings for him. He made me feel like I wasn't allowed to like him the way I did.

Edward stood back from me, finally taking in my sad expression. I could see the realization hit him as his once narrowed eyes, widen in shock and his tight lipped mouth, dropped open. He flinched as if in pain, seeing the damage his words had caused.

At that moment I didn't know who I felt more sorry for, myself or Edward.

"Bella, I…" He trailed off.

"Just go." I voiced weakly, feeling the sobs threatening to come.

Edward let out a heavy sigh, before complying with my request, leaving.

**What did I do wrong?**

**Why is Edward so upset?**

**What did I do to deserve this? **


	17. Meeting the shrink

**EPOV**

"You can go in now." A young, bubbly receptionist said, gesturing to a door on the far side of the room.

I took a deep breath to calm my nerves before making my way over, heading inside the big office.

"The doctor will be right with you." She informed, giving me a view of her pearly whites before closing the door behind her.

I took the time to scan my surroundings, trying to get a feel of this specialist.

The room looked like a regular office except for the fact there was a counselor chair in it. You know, the kind that you see people laying on in the movies when they tell a shrink all their deepest, darkest secrets. There was also a regular chair, for clients who preferred to sit instead on lay during their sessions.

In addition, the office had a nice view of a lake with a family of ducks. I'm sure the sight had a calming effect on people, helping them stay tranquil during their heated discussions. As for the rest of the room, there were stacks of files on the desk, showing just how popular this therapist was and the book shelves were decorated with family pictures. On the wall hung a certificate stating that this doctor has been practicing for twenty five years.

Knowing I was seeing an expert in the field lifted my spirits. I heard good things about this doctor but I have never seen her before. Shit, I never saw a therapist period. This was a first for me. I never thought I would be the kind of person that needed to see someone.

It wasn't till last night that it became clear to me. I have never been so angry before. I have never taken my anger out on someone else before. I needed to release my feelings before they killed me or got me into trouble.

Suddenly the door squeaked opened to reveal an older woman, who looked to be in her fifties. She wore chic, white colored glasses and had ear length, gray hair. She was wearing a long, white coat with her last name stitched into it; underneath she had on a white dress shirt and beige dress pants.

"You must be Edward, I'm doctor Roberts." She announced, carrying a notebook and pen in her hand.

"Please, have a seat." She said, gesturing to the furniture.

I looked back and forth between the couch and chair, not sure which one I should take. Though the couch looked very cushioned and comfy, I didn't feel comfortable enough to lie down. I didn't even know the woman and it just felt weird to lie down while I talked to a complete stranger, so I settled on siting in the simple chair.

"So tell me, what brings you here Edward?" Doctor Roberts asked, as she took a seat in her black, leather chair.

"Well, I've been thinking about my life lately, and I realized I'm not satisfied with it. My job has been taking a lot out of me, both emotionally and physically." I confessed.

"Really, would you care to explain?" She asked intrigued.

"Well, I have to put on a facade for work, and with the job I have, I don't have much time for a social life."

"I see, and what is it you do for a living Edward?"

**I knew that question was going to come up sooner or later.**

**How do I explain without giving away too much?**

"I rather not say exactly what it is I do, but I'll just tell you, I work in the sex industry." I voiced carefully.

**I wonder what she thinks of me now.**

"Hmm, interesting." Doctor Roberts expressed, before clicking her big, black, fancy pen open and started jotting some notes down.

**What is so interesting about that?**

**I wish I knew what she was writing.**

**I wonder if it's bad.**

"How old are you Edward?" She asked once she finished her notes, giving me eye contact.

"I'm twenty seven."

"Do you live with anyone?"

**Why does that matter?**

"No, not anymore." I stated.

"So, you did live with someone at one point." She interrogated, arching an eyebrow.

"Yes, my girlfriend at the time."

"You're not together anymore, what happened, why did your relationship end?" She questioned, curious.

"Well, I told her what I did for a living and she didn't take it very well. Then she asked me if I loved her and I couldn't say it."

I watched in silence as Doctor Roberts looked over the notes she took so far, deep in thought.

"I see. It seems like you have commitment issues Edward, for which your job could be to blame. You say you have to put on a performance at work, maybe you have been doing it for so long that you're starting to blur the lines between work and real life. What you think is fake is real and what you think is real is fake." She lectured.

**What the hell does that mean?**

**You have to go to college for this crazy talk?**

"Tell me something Edward, are you seeing anyone now?"

**Why, are you interested?**

**Please say no.**

**Relax Edward; she's just trying to help.**

**Therapists always ask that question, right?**

"No."

"Is there anyone your close to?" She continued.

"Well, there's Bella."

**Shit, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned her.**

**She is a client after all.**

"Who's Bella? Tell me about her. How did you two meet?"

**I guess I should open up to someone. **

**I mean if I can't even tell a therapist about Bella, who can I tell about her?**

"I met her through my job. She's a client of mine." I answered, starting to shake my leg.

I was beginning to feel agitated. I didn't know what it was but I felt like bolting. It started to feel hot and uncomfortable, like there was a spotlight on me and I felt like I was pinned down to the chair unable to escape. Yet, there were no ropes holding me down, there was no big, shining light in my face and I wasn't there against my will. I wanted to be there. I wanted to get help.

"Are you okay Edward? You seem uncomfortable talking about her." Doctor Roberts voiced, noticing my fidgety state.

"We, I, I kind of went off on her last night. I was stressed and upset. She didn't deserve it. I don't know why I yelled at her, I just saw her with that guy and freaked out."

"Guy, what guy?" She asked confused.

"I don't know. Some guy she went on a date with."

**Does it really matter who the fuck he was?**

"How did it make you feel to see Bella with this man?"

**How the fuck do you think it made me feel?**

"Angry."

"Why do you think that is?" Doctor Roberts continued with her questions.

"I don't know, I just felt it."

"Were you jealous Edward?"

"A little, but I was more upset than jealous."

"Why Edward?" She asked eagerly, as if we were breaking ground.

"Because she saw me, she saw me and just walked away, like I was nothing to her. She treated me the way all the other women treat me. I thought she was different."

**Shit, did I really just say that?**

**I didn't even know I felt that way.**

**Damn, Doctor Roberts is good.**

**I should definitely come back for another session.**

"You were upset she didn't hold up to your expectations of her?"

"Yeah."

"The women you meet in your field think rather low of you, is that right?"

"Yes." I stressed.

"How do you see yourself Edward?"

**What kind of question is that?**

"I don't know." I replied.

"Let me rephrase the question, how does your job make you feel?"

**Where do I start?**

"Disgusted, upset and worthless."

"Why is that Edward?"

"People use me for my body; they don't give a damn about me."

"What about Bella?" She asked intrigued.

"She was the only one to treat me like another human being. I mattered to her, until last night. She saw me and turned away. She didn't say anything. I could see the panic on her face. She thought I was going to rat her out to the guy and tell him we slept together or something. I'm not like that, I wouldn't do that, I would never sink that low." I stated, playing with my hands.

Doctor Roberts rested her chin on top of her left hand, listening to my every word, her face remained blank. It drove me nuts not knowing what she was thinking. I wondered if she thought I was more fucked up in the head than she originally thought. I wondered if she had worse cases then mine or if I was the worst.

"I could see this is starting to irritate you Edward, let's change the topic. How's your relationship with your parents? Do they know what you do for a living?"

My once tense form, softened at the conversation switch and I leaned back in my chair getting in a comfortable position.

"Our relationship is decent. I mean, my mom is a very supportive, loving, family oriented person and my father, is a workaholic, whose main concern is supporting his family financially. And no, they don't know what I do for a living. They think I graduated college and that I'm working as an agent in the music industry." I replied.

"Are you ashamed to tell your parents Edward, afraid they won't support you?"

"Of course, who wants to tell their parents they raised a manwhore?" I answered.

My eyes widened at my slip up and my cheeks grew red. I never told anyone outside my job what I did for a living or how I felt about it and here I was spilling everything to a complete stranger. Sure, it was her job, but this was a new and awkward experience for me.

"It's okay Edward, don't worry, everything we talk about is confidential. Nothing you say will leave this room." She promised.

I let out a sigh in relief. I knew she was bound by confidentiality to keep quiet but my job wasn't exactly legal, it felt good to have an actually verbal understanding that what I said could not be voiced on the outside.

"Well, I think that was good for our first session, you did great Edward, and I will see you again next week." Doctor Roberts announced, before giving me a warm smile goodbye.

* * *

After I finished my session I headed over to Bella's. Today was our official meet day and I wanted to apologize to her. She was after all the only one to feel remorse for how I got treated on a daily basis doing what I do. The rest of my clients didn't give a shit.

When I saw Bella turn away from me last night, it hit me. She was just another client, using me like everyone else. However, even though Bella was using me for her own needs, like the others, unlike like rest, she was nice and caring and I felt a strange need to protect her from the outside world.

I didn't want to see men corrupting her, changing her for the worse. I wanted Bella to always stay the same. I have seen so many girls that were once sweet, innocent and grateful, who later turned into spoiled sluts who didn't care about anyone including themselves. I didn't want that to happen to Bella.

I knocked on the front door, wondering if Bella was even going to answer it after the way I acted. I got my answered when the door opened after my second knock. Bella stood on the other side, not looking too pleased to see me.

"I'm sorry about the other night, it was unprofessional and I'm sorry about demanding that you tell me about your boyfriend."

Bella huffed clearly upset before speaking.

"First of all Edward, he is not my boyfriend, and second of all, who gives a fuck if it was unprofessional."

My eyes widen and my mouth nearly hit the floor hearing Bella talk like that. She was usually such a shy girl and talked courteously.

"Bella…" I started but she quickly cut me off.

"No, you know I was actually somewhat glad you acted that way, as fucked up as it sounds. You hold so much emotion inside of you Edward, it's scary. You have to tell people how you're feeling or else one day you'll just explode like you did last night."

"Your right, I know I'm not open and I'm sorry, it's just hard to be open to you because, you may be the closest thing to a friend I have but yet you're a client, it's very confusing." I confessed.

"I know and that's way I'm firing you." She announced.

"What?" I asked, feeling panicked.

"I no longer want to be a client."

"Bella, I'm sorry I didn't mean what I said I…"

"Let me finish, I no longer want to be your client because I would rather be your friend."

I couldn't help but smile at the news.

"Really?"

"Friends?" Bella asked holding out a hand.

I eyed her out stretched hand strangely.

**Is this what we come to, shaking hands like strangers?**

It just felt so impersonal to shake her hand after everything we went through together.

"Friends." I replied, before shocking Bella and pulling her into a hug.

I held her tightly in my arms, glad all was well again between us. I couldn't take it if Bella was still mad at me.

After her initial shock wore off Bella began to take part in the hug, wrapping her arms around my back. I closed my eyes, placing my head in the small indentation of her neck, breathing in her scent. She smelt like lavender and roses. One inhale of Bella's aroma was all the therapy I needed to make me sane again. I squeezed her closer to me, afraid what would happen once the embrace ended.

**Would I ever be able to hold her like this again?**

**Would she let me? **

The memories of last night clouded my brain as we ended the hug.

I could have really hurt Bella. I did hurt her. I pulled her so roughly by her arm last night, I was sure I probably left a mark. I carefully brought Bella's hand up in mine examining her arms, trying to figure out which arm it was I grabbed violently.

Bella watched in silence, curiosity filled her eyes as I traced her arms searching for bruises or scratches of any kind. Shockingly there were none. I sighed in relief letting go of her hands before meeting her gaze again.

Bella was such a pure at heart, sweet girl. I couldn't believe I even had the ability to hurt such a fragile creature. It sickened me to think of what could have happened if I had continued, if I didn't look into Bella's sad, scared eyes.

**Would I have continued on with my outrage?**

**Would I have hit Bella? **

**No, I refuse to believe I would do such a thing.**

**I would never hit a woman and definitely not Bella.**

I never hit a woman or touched a woman that didn't want to be touched. I hoped Bella knew that. I hoped she knew I wasn't this crazy psycho, who took out all his built up angry out on his clients.

"Bella, I'm…"

I know Edward; you don't have to say it. I know you're sorry. I know you didn't mean it, I know you're a good person at heart." She voiced giving me a small smile.

"You are the only one that understands me, the only one who took the time to figure me out." I stated taking one of her hands in mine, giving it a light squeeze.

"Thanks for that, thanks for caring." I added.

Bella's eyes lit up and she squeezed my hand back in response.

"You're welcome."

I started to panic; it started to feel like a kiss the girl moment. The vibe around us wasn't carefree and fun anymore, it wasn't even sad or angry. It was intense and compassionate. It felt, dare I say the words, almost as if we were boyfriend and girlfriend rather than friends.

**Shit, what did I get myself into?**

**Please don't fall for me Bella; I will only hurt you in the end.**

**

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**Note: **Happy Early Valentine's Day everyone! Show your love and review! ;)


	18. Work duty

**Note: Thanks to** **Shyshy1016 for bringing it to my attention my lack of mentioning what Bella does for a living. I answer your question in this chapter.**

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**BPOV**

Today is Thursday, which means work, another lovely full day at work. Not that I mind, I mean I love what I do for a living, it gives me something to do with my time and gives me time to think.

I work as a librarian, which I know to most people sounds like a boring job. There's not much that goes into it, stacking books on shelves, dealing with book returns and late books, helping customers and some computer work.

However to me, it was my home away from home. I always loved books growing up, reading different stories, fantasizing of a different life. Books were my outlet and having a lack of a social life, they saved me in a way. By reading a book I was able to have an understanding of what everyday people experience without the repercussions. Becoming a librarian was always right up my alley. I have been working as one for four years now and I can't picture myself doing anything else. I wouldn't want to.

My late grandma, Marie, left me money when she died. She was a very nice woman, I didn't know her for long but from what I remember, she was nice without a reason.

She was a penny saver. I remember a jar of change she kept in her house. Every time she found lose change it went in the jar. I used to complain to my parents about her being so obsessed with pennies. They would laugh of course and say "That's grandma for you."

I guess you could say Marie's money obsessing ways paid off; I mean I ended up with a decent amount of dough thanks to her smart savings.

I used the money as a down payment on a small house in Forks. My father co-owns my house and helps me whenever work is slow and I end up a little short on my payments.

I was two hours into work when I got a call on my cell. The ringing echoed across the library causing some clients to look up from there spots in annoyance. I quickly searched my bag for my phone as my manager, Marge, came over with a stern look on her old face.

"Isabella, cell phones are to be turned off on the premises." She lectured, holding a book to her chest.

"I know I'm sorry, I forgot. I'm just going to see who this is, it could be important." I replied, before clicking the talk button.

"Hello?" I whispered into my phone, as Marge started to tap her foot in annoyance.

Marge was a usually nice, old woman, but when it came to her library she took things seriously. It was like the library was her baby or something.

"Hey girl, I haven't heard from you and I wanted to know how the big date went." Alice's loud voice came through the speaker.

"Isabella." Marge warned.

"I'm going to take this outside, I'll be right back. It will just take a minute."

Marge let out a defeated sigh and went back to her clients as I headed out the back door.

"Alice, I can't talk right now, Marge is giving me the evil eye and I have work to do." I expressed, looking around to make sure Marge wasn't ease dropping or anything.

"Oh please, that lady needs to get a life." Alice replied.

Shockingly I found myself nodding in agreement. Funny, someone like me, thinking someone else needed a life when I barely had one myself. I suddenly had a disturbing thought. Maybe I was more like Marge than I believed. Maybe I would end up like her one day, thinking of the library as my own baby or husband, whatever. I shook those thoughts from my head as Alice went on.

"So how was it?" She asked excitedly.

"It was nice, different." I answered.

"Oh, different is good, so are you two going out again?" She questioned.

"Umm, yeah, I mean, we talked about it but never really set a date." I stated, glancing at the back door.

"Well, why not? Girl you have to get them while there still around. You don't find sweet guys that look like Jacob very often." Alice stressed.

"Yeah, well, I know one." I argued.

**Shit, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it.**

**Alice is not one to let things go.**

"Oh really, so there is someone else you're interested in? Girl, I need details. What's he like, what does he look like, how did you meet…" Alice rambled on.

"Ahem."

I looked back to find Marge clearing her throat.

**Saved by the old lady.**

"Alice, I have to go, we'll talk later." I stated before hanging up my phone.

"Sorry about that, friend crisis." I lied making my way through the door.

"I have to work the desk up front, can I count on you to make the rounds and help the costumers find what they're looking for?" Marge asked uncertain.

**Jeez, one phone call and she lost all confidence in me.**

"Yes, I'm sure I can manage. I have been doing this job for four years now." I reminded her.

Marge nodded satisfied, before handing me a book.

"Here, start by putting this back, I have people to attend to." She claimed, heading back to the front desk.

**God, I hope I never become like that.**

I flipped the book over in my hand, reading the cover. Sex positions 101. I immediately blushed bringing the book up to my chest trying to cover it up, not wanting anyone to see.

**I didn't even know we had a sex section?**

**What the hell is a sex section doing in an old fashion library like this?**

**Do people actually check these kinds of books out?**

**Apparently, eww!**

I proceeded over toward the sex education section looking for the spot the book belonged to. Thankfully the area was pretty bare, there was only one other person there. A middle aged guy who was eyeing me up and down, as if I was some kind of freak in the sheets.

**Eww, doesn't he know I work here; I have a name tag for goodness sakes.**

I now knew why Marge wanted me to return this book instead of herself. After I quickly placed the book back in its rightful spot I started to head back up when I noticed Edward two rows down, towards the back.

**What is he doing here?**

**I wouldn't have pegged him for a reader.**

I slowly made my way over taking in his appearance as I got closer. He was in his casual clothes with his hair in a sexy mess. I came up behind him, looking over his shoulder, trying to get a glimpse at what he was so interested in.

**Love poems?**

"Can I help you sir?" I whispered against his ear in the best seductive voice I could.

Edward jumped in shock obviously not expecting someone to be behind him. He dropped his book in the process.

"Bella?" He questioned through wide eyes.

"Yes." I answered, as I picked up the tossed book up off the floor.

"You work here?" Edward asked still trying to calm his nerves.

"Nothing gets past you. Are you looking for something particular or just browsing?" I said looking up from the book to meet his gaze.

**Damn he looks hot today.**

"Ah, looking for a poetry book." He answered glancing over at the rows of books.

"Who is the book for?"

"My parents, their 28th anniversary is coming up" He announced, running a hand through his wild hair.

"Oh."

**Damn his hair.**

**I just want to tug it so badly.**

I turned my back to Edward putting the book back on the bookshelf, as I tried to clear my impure thoughts.

I began to scan the row for a good poetry book when I felt Edward's hard body press into my back. I thought maybe he was just coming in for a closer look until I felt his warm lips on my neck, leaving light kisses, and felt his manly hands on my shirt covered, breast, gently massaging them. His efforts left my nipples hard and me panting for more.

"Ah, this is not what I meant when I said we should be friends." I stressed, finding it hard to concentrate.

Edward snickered against my neck, making me shiver in the process. His hands moved down my body towards the top of my skirt. He moved the material to the side, dipping his hands inside. His fingers stroked the sensitive skin of my hips , before gripping my waist with his full hands bringing my body back against his, letting me feel his growing problem.

"Stop." I voiced weakly.

"Why? You like it." Edward claimed, smirking against neck.

"Someone will see." I stressed, looking around paranoid.

"That's half the fun." He said huskily, rubbing himself against me.

"Edward." I strained.

"Fine, have it your way." He sighed, removing his hands and backing away.

"Thank you." I panted out, as I tried to calm myself down.

I turned back around to find Edward staring intensely.

**Shit.**

Suddenly the thought of still being on my period didn't sound like such a setback. I was so tempted to have sex.

**Shit, if he keeps looking at me like that, I'm not going to be responsible for my actions**

**Distract him.**

"Wow, twenty eight years." I expressed, trying to get back on the topic.

"Yeah, a milestone now a days. My dad wanted to check out some love poems so he can recite it to my mom. However, I live closer to the library than they do, so he asked if I could pick some up for him." Edward stated, his eyes started to soften, coming back down to my level.

"I think it's great that people stay together that long and beat the odds. My parents barely lasted ten years." I confessed.

"Yeah well, at least you don't have to see them act all mushy, gushy, those images don't leave you, trust me." Edward said shaking away his thoughts.

"Here, I think this book would be perfect for your parents." I claimed, handing him another book of poetry.

"It has all that lovey, dovey, stuff you can't stand, but I'm sure they will love it."

"Great." Edward announced, giving me a warm smile that melted my heart.

* * *

After Edward left I couldn't help but to wonder about our new found relationship. I wanted to be friends so he could see me differently from the rest. I knew Edward felt like a sex object because of his job, I didn't want him to think of me as a client anymore. However, when he touched me, I almost forgot why I wanted to be friends in the first place. I felt guilty. I said one thing and want something completely different.

At that moment, I didn't mind being into Edward just for the sex, I was no better than any of his other clients. I wanted to rise above that. I started to wonder if maybe Edward's little stunt was a test to see how truthful I was being with this friends thing. A test I almost failed. I wanted Edward to feel he had a real friend to confide in, someone he could trust and not feel used and emotional abused by. I wanted to be that person, but at this point, I'm not so sure if I can.

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**Review! ;)**


	19. Playful friends

**Note: **I apologize for this chapter in advance. It is not the best, so bear with me. I originally was not going to write epov of the library scene, instead, I was going to move forward, but a reader brought it to my attention that they were curious of how the scene felt through Edward's eyes and I thought a couple of readers, if not most, probably felt the same, so I went ahead and wrote the library scene from epov as well.

Unfortunately, there is not much different from this chapter's compared to Bella's, except Edward's thoughts. It didn't come out as well as I had hoped for and believe it or not took some time to think of considering this chapter wasn't originally in my plans.

Anyways, next chapter we will move on to Edward and Bella's new found friendship and it should be better. Thanks again to my readers for your support and giving me such drive to make this story the best it can be. ;)

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**EPOV**

I awoke to the sound of my alarm clock going off. The beeping noise got louder by the seconds, reminding me it was time to get up and start another day. I quickly hit the off button, wanting the annoying on going noise to end.

I let out a tired sigh and rubbed my sleepy eyes, before pulling back the covers and sluggishly making my way out of bed. My feet dragged across the ground as I made my way to the shower. I turned on the hot water, taking off my boxers and jumped in, hoping the heated water would wake me up further.

Today I had yet another client to please, Ms. Smith to be exact. She was a nice enough client, but I was feeling a little reluctant to go back to work after the fiasco I had with Mrs. Sanders a couple days ago. I could still remember those kids' curious and judgmental looks towards me. I could only imagine what they were thinking. I shivered at the thought, scrubbing away at my skin till it was light pink, as if I was trying to scrub away my sins. I would need a hell of a lot more soap to do that.

Once satisfied I was clean, I lightly dried myself with a towel before wrapping it around my waist and made my way back to my room in search of something to wear. I could feel a couple of water droplets I missed while drying my skin, run freely down my chest before getting soaked up by into my towel clad waist. I headed to my dresser for a change of clothes when my cell went off. I picked up the vibrating, light flashing device, curious who could be calling me. My face scrunched up in confusion as I read the name that appeared on the screen. I hit the talk button and brought the cell to my ear.

"Kami, what's going on?" I asked my secretary as I opened one of my dresser drawers, eyeing my clothing options.

It was rare for her to call me. She usually waited till I was in the office to inform me on any news. I took her calling as a bad sign.

"Hello Mr. Cullen, I just wanted you to know your client for today, Ms. Smith, canceled. Something came up. I thought I would let you know before you headed over there."

I let out a breath of relief glad it wasn't anything serious before replying.

"Oh, okay then. In that case, I think I'll take the day off." I announced, grabbing a pair of sweats and a plain white shirt.

**This day worked out better than I thought.**

**It will be nice to have a day to myself.**

"Okay than, I'll see you tomorrow." Kami replied.

"Thank you Kami, see you tomorrow." I voiced before hanging up my phone.

* * *

I smiled to myself, loving the fact I could wear comfortable clothing like sweats and not have to worry about what anyone else thought about my fashion style. I could wear what I wanted for a change.

The stretchy, cotton material felt so much better on than the uptight, restrained suits I constantly had to wear for work.

I headed over to the living room taking a seat on the sofa and turned on the television looking for something decent to watch.

* * *

I spent a good portion of the day pigging out on snack foods like, chips and dip and watching drama filled movies on Lifetime. I have to admit I used to think of Lifetime as a girly channel. I could never stand it when Erica used to watch it. Maybe because I never gave it a chance or had a chance to really sit through a whole movie without having to leave for work. I have to say though, the channel was quite good. There were lots of different, suspenseful, crime related movies.

I started watching a movie about a serial killer. Somewhere between the cops having their suspicions about one guy and another crime taking place, I dozed off. I later woke up to a teen pregnancy drama.

**What am I doing?**

**I'm wasting my day away watching television, I need to get out of here before I start putting on a facial mask, and learn the entire cast of one of those mid-day soaps.**

I quickly turned off the program and headed to my room to change into more suitable clothes for going out. I opted for a pair of blue jeans and white t-shirt, keeping my clothing casual. I didn't bother with gelling my hair down either. The truth was I hated gelling my hair. I just did it for work. Once work was done with for the day, washing that crap out of my hair was the first thing I did.

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I walked around small shops in town, just to give me something to do. The fact was I didn't really know how to have a day to myself. I wasn't sure what to do. I mean, I got the weekend off but I usually used those days as my sleep recovery days, catching up on some missed z's.

I took in the scenery around me, breathing in the fresh air as I walked around, taking in what the little town of Forks had to give. In the process, I came across an old looking library, stopping in my tracks. My father asked if I would check out a book of poems for him a week ago. I never promised him I would, considering how busy and unpredictable my work was. However, I did say I would try.

**Oh, what the hell.**

**I'm already here, might as well see what they have to offer.**

I opened the door and was greeted by the sounds of jingles before it closed behind me.

**Wow, this place is huge.**

I eyed the place up and down and all around in amazement, surprised I have never been in the place considering I lived in Forks my whole life. There were walls covered with shelves of books. There were also columns dedicated to books, every row had its own theme. As well as there was a reading area set in the middle of the library, with tables and chairs for people to be able to sit and read for as long as they wanted.

I scanned the rows till I found the section I was looking for. Book after book, I skimmed through confused on which one to pick. There were so many poetry books to choose from.

**Why did I agree to this?**

**Who am I kidding there must be a hundred books on poems alone, how will I ever find the right one?**

"Can I help you sir?" I heard a female whisper against my ear.

I freaked out dropping the book I was looking at in surprise.

**Shit, do they sneak up on all their customers?**

**I almost pissed my pants.**

I worked on calming my irregular heart rate as I turned to face the worker. My eyes nearly doubled in shock at the sight before me.

"Bella?"

"Yes." She answered confidently, before bending down and picking up the poetry book up off the floor.

In the process, her dress shirt lowered, giving me a nice view of her baby pink colored bra.

"You work here?" I asked as my eyed traveled to the name tag on her blouse.

"Nothing gets past you. Are you looking for something particular or just browsing?" She asked giving a small smile.

I scanned her body over, feeling myself getting excited at the fact that she worked in the library. She was more dressed up than usual, wearing a knee high, black skirt that clung to her body, showing her great curves off and a white, silk blouse, that was flowing on her. She had her hair in its natural form; resting passed her shoulders and she finished the look off with a pair of black pumps.

**What a pleasant surprise. **

"Ah, looking for a poetry book." I answered moving my eyes towards the books on my side, trying to stick to the task at hand.

"Who is the book for?" Bella asked curious.

"My parents, their 28th anniversary is coming up" I answered, feeling a little uncomfortable about spilling such stuff to Bella.

It was harmless information, but it was private to me. I felt that if she kept trying to get me to open up about my life, pretty soon I would reveal all there was to me and I would have nothing left of my own.

I run a hand through my wild hair, not liking this new found weakness of mine. I preferred sex to talking. I wasn't sure how long I could last as this giver of information also known as a friend. I was glad Bella cared for my opinion and thoughts on things but I preferred sex. I preferred the instant high you got from sex, to be more precise.

**I mean, how often does a person get that kind of satisfaction just from talking?**

**Shit, I want sex, with her, right now.**

"Oh." Bella replied before turning her back to me scanning the bookshelf.

I used this to my advantage looking her backside over. I couldn't help but picture Bella wearing a pair of glasses with her hair in a messy bun, while reading a book intrigued, biting her lower lip.

I was rock hard and frisky with loads of time on my hands.

**Why the hell are just standing around and talking?**

I pressed my hard body into Bella's back, letting her feel all of me. I bit my lower lip to suppress a moan; it's been so long since I felt her body against mine, since I felt her warmth, felt her tightness. I yearned for it.

I laid small kisses on her neck, loving the way she tasted on my lips. I could hear Bella sigh, as she leaned against the book shelf. I wasn't sure if she was doing it do get as much distance from me as she could or because she felt weak in the knees and needed the support.

More importantly I didn't care. I wanted her bad, I never felt so drawn to someone before. It scared me and thrilled me at the same time.

**Shit, maybe I'm just a horny bastard.**

I wasn't sure if I should go forward with my desires or not. My hands had a mind of their own moving over Bella's covered breast, giving them each a gentle squeeze. Bella started to pant from my actions. I could feel her nipples harden under my palms.

"Ah, this is not what I meant when I said we should be friends." Bella weakly voiced.

**Oh Bella, but this is so much more fun and sexy.**

I snickered against her neck, coming to my decision. I was going to fuck her against the book shelf and then maybe on the ground. My hands moved down her curves towards the top of her skirt. I dipped my hands inside, teasing her with my fingers as I stroked the sensitive skin of her hips. I wanted her to beg for more. I wanted her to scream my name out in ecstasy. I wanted to fuck her so hard and deep she would never forget it. I yanked her waist back against my body, giving her another feel of my dick.

"Stop." She whispered.

I was on the fence with her plea. She voice though weakened with lust was serious. Yet, her body was reacting to my touch, showing its want. It was obvious we both wanted and needed this.

"Why? You like it." I claimed, smirking against her neck.

"Someone will see." She stressed, looking to the left and right of her in fear.

I was happy to see she was at least somewhat thinking about the idea. She just didn't like the fact that someone could see us.

"That's half the fun." I said huskily, rubbing myself against her ass.

I bit harder into my lip trying to overcome my lust and temptation of throwing her to the ground and banging her right then and there.

**Fuck, why am I so fucking horny around her?**

"Edward." She strained.

My name escaped her lips, just not in the way I wanted.

"Fine, have it your way." I sighed, removing my hands and backing away.

I wasn't dumb; I knew Bella would never agree to public sex. In fact, I myself found it to be tacky. I just wanted to see how far I could push Bella's buttons sexually. See how open she was to trying new things.

I have to admit the idea of having sex with Bella in public did intrigue me though. It is a powerful high to be able to show others that you are the only one who could please that person. I think that's why people find public sex so appealing, it's almost as if they are making a silent claim on that person, showing people only they can get that person off that way. They have all the power.

I have to confess it was a great high to know I was the only one Bella has ever slept with, the only one to get her off. Not many guys could claim the same.

"Thank you." She panted out, turning around to face me.

"Wow, twenty eight years." She voiced, looking amazed at the thought.

"Yeah, a milestone now a days. My dad wanted to check out some love poems so he can recite them to my mom. However, I live closer to the library than they do, so he asked if I could pick some up for him." I stated, feeling awkward with this sudden drift from contemplating having public sex to talking about commitment.

"I think it's great that people stay together that long and beat the odds. My parents barely lasted ten years."

"Yeah well, at least you don't have to see them act all mushy, gushy, those images don't leave you, trust me." I said, remembering the number of time my parents displayed their love in front of me as a kid, kissing and talking naughty to each other.

"Here, I think this book would be perfect for your parents." Bella replied, taking me out of my creepy thoughts handing me another book of poetry.

"It has all that lovey, dovey, stuff you can't stand, but I'm sure they will love it." She expressed.

"Great." I announced, giving her a warm smile.

* * *

With all the lustful feelings I suddenly had for Bella, I couldn't help but wonder what made her so different from other women I have been around on and off works hours. Why did she appeal to me so much?

I mean, sure she was nice and wasn't afraid to be herself but it was more than that. It had to be. Bella wasn't the first shy or friendly girl I met. She of course, was the only one I ever reacted to this way. I was never really into shy girls; I found them dull and very self-conscious. Bella was in a class of her own.

Her mysterious, closed off ways left me intrigued and wanting to know more about her. I found her extremely sexy when she put her faith in my hands sexually, and was willing to push the boundaries. I loved the sexy, confident, little vixen I released in Bella.

I loved that she didn't question my motives, instead trusted me enough to let herself go during sex and become comfortable in her own skin, not caring about how she came off. I loved that she allowed me to be able to witness and be a part of her own discoveries about herself along the way, letting me see her bare emotionally, bravely showing the fragile and beautiful side of her.

I loved that there were no walls between us, that I made her that comfortable. I loved that she felt she could be herself around me and that she accepted me for me as well. She wasn't disappointed in me. She didn't want me to act fake. Instead she wanted to see the real me. She was the first client that, liked me for me. I was enough for her, no façade needed.

* * *

**Note: **Review, pretty please.


	20. Visit from Renee

**Note: **I actually hit 4,000 words. I never thought I would see the day. This is the longest chapter I ever wrote and probably ever will, so be nice and review.

* * *

**EPOV**

"Let's recap. Last time we met we ended the session with you telling me how you saw yourself. Do you really see yourself as a manwhore, Edward?" Dr. Roberts asked grabbing a pen off her desk, ready to start taking notes.

"It's the truth; I get paid to have sex with women. What would you call it?" I challenged, not afraid to face the truth about myself.

Dr. Roberts gave me a concerned look, one I often saw from Bella when hearing about my life. I didn't want her pity. I didn't want anyone's pity.

"Edward, have you ever thought of leaving your job?"

"All the time."

"And what stops you?" She asked curious, as if I was a puzzle she couldn't quite solve but was determined to figure out.

"I wonder if I will be able to find the same success in another job as I have found with this one. I put so much of me in my job, so much time, effort. I don't know if I have the strength to do it again. What if I fail, then what?"

"What if you succeed Edward? You have to think of why you're doing this in the first place. What it is you truly want." Dr. Roberts preached.

**What do I want?**

**I thought I knew once. Now, I'm not so sure anymore.**

**I know nothing about what the future holds for me, I only know the present and the past.**

"What are you more afraid of, succeeding or failing?" She asked taking me off guard.

"I don't know. They both have consequences."

"How about with relationships, what's worse, being alone or being loved?" She continued as if she was getting somewhere.

"I'm used to failing and I'm used to being on my own. I would be afraid of failing the person who cared for me, not living up to their hopes." I admitted.

It got quiet for a moment as Dr. Roberts took some notes. I looked at the clock on the wall wondering how much longer I had to deal with this interrogation before bringing my gaze to the lake outside. It was a clear, sunny Saturday morning, perfect for doing something outdoors. Yet, I was indoors stuck in a stuffy little office baring my soul to a stranger.

**Who am I kidding?**

**She won't be able to cure me.**

**I've been this fucked up person for years.**

**Someone has yet to fix me, what makes this therapist think she will be any different?**

"How do you sleep at night?" She suddenly asked breaking me from my thoughts.

**What does this have to do with anything?**

"Sleep?" I questioned.

"Yes, do you sleep on your back, on your side, stomach?"

"I sleep on my side." I voiced, confused on where all this sleep talk was going.

"Good, and do you curl up in a ball on your side, hug a pillow?" Dr. Roberts continued with her bizarre questions.

"I hug a pillow, I guess."

"What about when you're sleeping with someone else?"

"I guess, I prefer to cuddle."

Dr. Roberts nodded towards my answers as if I was confirming something she was silently thinking.

"It seems like you're missing that intimacy level in your life that most people have. You, yourself might think you're better off without love but your body tells a very different story. It craves to be paid attention to. You should listen to it Edward."

**You get this from me sleeping with a pillow?**

"How about sex, how do you prefer sex in your private life?" She asked intrigued.

"Well, my work takes a lot out of me, so when I do find time to date someone, I usually don't have the stamina to have sex. Most of the time, I don't want to have sex. I prefer to kiss."

Dr. Roberts looked to be deep in thought, tapping the end of her pen to her lips as she thought what to ask next.

"Hmm, how are things with Bella? Have you two talked since your fight?"

"Yeah, we decided to be friends officially." I stated flatly.

"You don't sound too happy about that." She said arching an eyebrow, questioning.

"Apart of me feels good that Bella wants to be friends. Another part is disappointed, and I'm not sure why. I mean, this is what I wanted, to have someone to confide in, yet, I feel like something is missing."

"It sounds like you want more than just friendship, am I right?"

"More yes than no. I'm not the best with relationships; I'm worried I will ruin how close we've come. That this new found friendship will ruin what we already have. I'm not as open as most people are." I confessed.

"Why is that?"

"In my field, you have very little privacy, people take so much out of you, physically and emotionally, to the point you feel there is nothing left of you. You feel like one day you will wake up and that you will dissolve completely and this façade you wear will overtake you, till it's all you are. So, you see, I try to keep as much of my life to myself. I have to protect what's left of me." I argued, feeling antsy.

"Okay, let's move on, I can see I hit a sore subject." Dr. Roberts voiced, seeing my restless state.

I moved in my chair trying to get into a comfortable position before she continued with her questions.

"What do you prefer sexually, do you like to be in charge or have others be in charge?"

"I don't know, I never thought about it." I voiced running a hand through my hair.

"So think about. Let me put it this way, which do you usually find yourself doing?"

"Being in charge. It's my job to please my clients."

"Okay and how does that feel?" She asked.

"It's okay I guess, kind of predictable, and more work than actually play." I declared.

"Okay, so maybe you should switch it up." Dr. Roberts suggested.

"What do you mean?"

"Maybe you should try to let the person you sleep with take the lead for a change, have them do the work. That way you can relax, focus more on what you're feeling rather than thinking and get a little surprise in the process."

"Yeah, I guess." I replied, feeling weird about talking about such things to someone who was old enough to be my grandma.

"Edward, have you ever tried oral?" She suddenly asked.

My eyes widened. Sure, I thought about it, once or twice but I never did it. I never wanted to.

"It's not my thing." I answered.

"How do you know if you never tried it?" Dr. Roberts challenged.

"It just sounds degrading to ask a woman to do that and vice versa. People that do that are wh…"

"Are what Edward?"

"Whores." I answered.

**I have monthly check ups for STD's and my clients have to have a clear record of health before I agree to anything sexually with them, but who's to say they wouldn't sleep with someone else and catch something later on?**

**Not to mention, that you would be putting your mouth on the same area where people have bodily fluids come out of, that's just gross and unsanitary. **

"That's pretty harsh coming from someone in the sex field and not every one that tries it, are as easy as you say. Regular couples have oral, not all, but some. I think it would be good for you. You seem to be more into pleasing other people, giving them what they want. it would be a good exercise for you to figure out what you want." She claimed.

**Is my therapist really encouraging me to have oral?**

**I never thought I would see the day.**

"I don't know." I replied unsure.

She was definitely hitting unfamiliar territory with me. I guess that's what a therapist does. I just wasn't expecting it.

"Doesn't hurt to try." She voiced.

* * *

**BPOV**

I was glad it was finally Saturday. Today was the first official day Edward and I made plans to hang out as friends. It was also a relief because my period was finally over. Most women's periods lasted seven days but mine only lasted five days. It was a delight to know I no longer had to worry about wearing pads, my blood flow and being miserable. I could finally have sex, yet, I had no one to have sex with now that I was friends with Edward.

I worked my way out of one hole just to end up in another. I loved having Edward around me. I was satisfied with him and I was broken without him.

I nearly ran to the front door on sheer adrenaline alone, once I heard the sound of knocking. I didn't have to look in the peep hole to know who it was. My heart was racing with anticipation.

It was a nice surprise to see Edward Thursday but at the same time, our encounter only further confirmed my feelings for him. Friday had been dreadful, a whole day without seeing Edward, a whole day without his touch, without his smile. My heart ached to have him by my side as I lay alone in my bed, staring at the empty spot next to me.

I opened the door to find a smiley faced Edward. Seeing his face light up at the sight of me I couldn't help but wonder if the small time apart had been as hard for him as it had been for me.

"You really need to get out of this house and get some sun. You're as pale as a ghost, it's not healthy." He lectured, looking me over.

I frowned slightly at his comment. Out of all the things Edward could have greeted me with, that was not what I was hoping for.

"Me, what about you?" I argued, pointed to his light colored skin.

"Both of us need some sun. Come on, we're going to the beach." He announced.

Though I liked the idea of spending time with Edward, I wasn't too thrilled of having to show my body. It was one thing when it was just Edward and I, but there were surely going to be other people at the beach. I wasn't sure how comfortable I was showing my body off to anyone else.

"I don't have to wear a swimsuit do I?" I asked hesitantly.

"Well, you could always go naked. I don't mind." He teased.

I blushed deeply at the thought.

"I'll go change." I replied quickly, leaving Edward in the living room as I headed to my closet.

**This just friend's thing is going to be harder than I thought.**

I looked through my closet till I came across the peach colored bikini Alice got me a couple shopping trips ago. I never wore it, being how I was never one for showing off my skin.

I made quick work putting it on before throwing a comfortable shirt and pair of shorts on over it. Once I had my sandals on I proceeded out my room to a waiting Edward.

"Ready to go?" Edward asked as I came over.

I was about answer when one of my sandals got caught up on the living room rug. I tripped and ended up falling face first into Edward's crotch.

"Well this is awkward and embarrassing." I mumbled against his jeans.

Edward chuckled, stepping back to give me room.

"Here, let me help you up." He said, giving me his hand.

I took it, slowly getting back up on my shaking legs.

"You okay?" Edward asked concerned.

"Yeah, thank god you weren't aroused or I would be sporting a black eye."

My eyes widened at my own words, I quickly clasp my hand around my mouth embarrassed. Edward laughed it off.

"That is true."

* * *

The waves crashed into the shore, the sun shone high in the sky and Edward was wearing nothing but a pair of yellow swim trunks. My eyes were glued to his built chest. Someone could have screamed shark and I wouldn't have known.

"Here, let's put some lotion on that pale skin of yours." Edward said grabbing the sunblock.

"I thought you said I needed some sun." I protested.

"Some yes, but you don't want to burn. Come on, turn around." Edward instructed as he squeezed a good portion of the lotion in his hand.

I did as told giving him access to my back. I could feel his legs lightly touching the outside of my own as I sat in the little nest he created. Edward began to rub the sunblock into my skin. I gasped at the sensation. It felt so good. I closed my eyes enjoying the sun's warmth mix with the scent of coconut in the air and the feel of his firm hands on my back.

As Edward rubbed the lotion in over my sides, his hand accidentally brushed against the side of one of my covered breasts. I bit back a moan as he continued to rub deep into my pale flesh. I could feel my bikini bottoms getting wet.

**Doesn't he know the effect he has on me?**

**Suddenly the thought of having sex with Edward here on the beach is very appealing. **

"My turn." Edward said, handing me the bottle once he finished caring for my skin.

I moved from his hold, turning around to face him. Edward gave me a smirk before turning around himself, placing his back in front of my view. I quickly got to work, rubbing the lotion on his beautiful back. I made sure to blend it in well and cover all areas. I gave him the same treatment as he did for me, running my hand over his sides. Edward let out a snicker under my touch.

"What?"

"That tickles." He informed.

"Oh."

I liked his laugh; it was real, pure, and sweet. I wanted to hear it again. I ran my hands over the same area again; I could have sworn I heard a pant.

**I must have not heard clearly.**

I ran my hands across his sides again. I heard a low moan.

**Shit, did I just turn Edward on?**

I quickly removed my hands.

"Okay, all finished." I announced.

Edward turned around giving me his usual smile.

"Thanks."

I nodded not knowing what to say. He was truly breathtaking. I had a strange desire to yank off his trunks and have my way with him.

**Why did I end this arrangement again?**

**Oh right, I love him.**

**I don't need another reason to fall for him.**

**Time apart will be good for me to clear my cloudy, sex dazed head.**

"So what's going on with you and this guy?" Edward asked out of nowhere, with his eyes fixed downward.

I followed his view till I came across his hand making its way to my stomach. He ran his fingers over my skin, teasingly drawing lines, giving me chills in the process.

I gulped before responding.

"What guy?" I asked confused.

"You know, the guy." He said without going into further details, as he continued his playful little traces across my lower stomach, his fingertips just shy of reaching my bikini bottoms.

"Oh, are you referring to the guy you went crazy over a couple of days ago?" I asked, wanting him to quit playing his little seductive games and be honest with me.

I may have forgiven Edward for his actions that night, but I haven't forgotten about it. I thought we were making great progress when he came back and apologized. I was relieved that he was honest with me. I wanted him to be;

Yet, here he was retreating back under his shell. Using games and subtle hints instead of just saying what was on his mind. He had a sexual power over me and he knew it, what's worst, he was using that against me. Every time I wanted to learn more, grow closer, he would push me away with his sexual teasing, anything to get my mind away from discovering the real Edward. I couldn't understand what he was so afraid of?

Edward let out a sigh, removing his hand from my body, realizing playtime was over.

"I didn't go crazy." He stated.

"Oh, no?" I argued.

"Okay, maybe a little, but he's not why I got upset that night."

"Then what was it?"

"Do we really have to talk about this? I already had this conversation with Dr. Roberts and I really don't want to get into it again." He said sounding stressed.

"Dr. Roberts?"

"My therapist." Edward stated.

**His talking to someone?**

**How long has this been going on?**

**He never mentioned a therapist before.**

"Oh, I didn't realize you were seeing a shrink."

"I just started actually, today was my second session with her."

**Her?**

**He's seeing a female therapist?**

**Great.**

I couldn't help but think of what this therapist looked like. I pictured an appealing woman in her mid-thirties wearing a tight, sexy outfit. I imagined her getting Edward to open up emotional, using it to her advantage, seducing him in the process, before having sex with him on her desk. I know it was awful to think that, but I knew the way Edward affected women. I was one after all; just one look from him had my panties wet.

"So, what do you guys talk about?" I asked curious.

"Lots of things, family, work and you."

**Me?**

**What the hell would he have to tell his therapist about me, that he couldn't say to my face?**

"So, is she attractive?" I asked carefully.

Edward smirked clearly knowing it bugged me. He busted out laughing.

**Am I missing something?**

"What?"

"Bella, she's in her fifties. She looks old enough to be my grandmother." Edward explained.

"Well how am I supposed to know that?" I voiced in my defense.

"Don't tell me you're jealous." He said amazed, that a fifty year old woman could make me envious.

"Maybe a little."

"That's crazy."

"No it's not. She knows more about you than I do." I argued.

Edward was able to open up to a complete stranger but yet could not open up to me. I was happy he was getting help but at the same time I wanted to be the one to get him to open up.

"She's a shrink; it's her job to get stuff out. It's not like I do it willingly. Besides, it's nothing exciting. It's kind of depressing. Trust me, what I have to say you don't want to hear." Edward claimed.

"So, is she helping?"

"I'm not sure; she actually gave me an exercise to try this time around. Maybe you could help me with it."

"Oh, yeah?" I asked intrigued, happy he wasn't totally shutting me out.

"Yeah, umm, how do you feel about the thought of taking a dick in your mouth?"

"What?" I questioned through wide eyes.

**How the hell did we get on this subject?**

**Oh god, his not referring to what I think he is, is he?**

"My therapist asked me to consider getting a blow job, since it's against my rules and I don't have anyone in my private life that just leaves you."

"How flattering."

**How is getting a blowjob going to help with his emotional problems?**

**Is he pulling my leg?**

**What kind of therapist suggests such a thing?**

"I know, it's not my idea either, but she asked me to try. It has to do with something about getting out of my comfort zone. Hell, I don't know." Edward confessed.

**I just got used to the idea of looking at a dick, now he wants me to suck one?**

**I don't know if I can do that.**

"I'll think about it, I can't just go to it." I replied.

"No, I didn't mean now, I just thought I would put it out there."

"We'll see."

* * *

I opened the door to find a suit case sitting on the living room floor. I cautiously made my way inside with Edward on my tail.

"Bella?" I turned to find my mother in my kitchen fixing herself a drink.

"Mom, what are you doing here?" I asked surprised.

"I wanted to see my baby girl." She answered before quickly made her way over giving me a big hug.

I relaxed against her hold until I remember Edward was with me.

"Who's this?" My mom asked breaking the embrace.

My eyes widened for a moment. I wasn't prepared for her questions.

**Who should I say he is?**

**We are friends, sort of.**

"Umm, mom this is a friend of mine, Edward Cullen. Edward this is my mom, Renee."

"Nice to meet you Mam." Edward said putting on the charm.

I watched as my mom's eyes lit up at his smooth ways.

"Such a gentleman." She voiced.

When Edward wasn't looking she mouth to me "Yummy." Causing me to roll my eyes.

"Careful, she likes them young." I half joked.

"I have my man." My mother stated proudly.

"Keep thinking that."

"What?" She asked surprised by my back talk.

"You once thought Charlie was your Mr. Right, look how that turned out." I lectured.

"Yeah, I'm going to go. I have to get back home; it was nice meeting you Renee. I'll see you around Bella. Be nice." Edward stated before heading out.

"Thank you, it was nice meeting you to Edward!" My mom called out.

"Well, at least someone has manners." She added before meeting my gaze again.

"I've been with Phil a little over five years now don't you think it's time you gave him some respect?"

"You can't be serious. Phil acts more immature than me. So do you by the way. You know sometimes I feel like I'm the parent and you're the kid. Don't you think it's time to can this fantasy you have and face reality, grow up and take responsibility?" I snapped.

"Bella, don't talk like that to me, I'm your mother."

"Then act like it."

My mother looked so hurt; I immediately regretted what I said. I wasn't even sure why I was coming down on her so hard. It wasn't like me. It wasn't like me at all.

"I'm sorry."

"What is this about? It's not about me; it's about that boy isn't it?" She questioned.

"How do you know?"

"A mother's instinct. Tell me what's bugging my little baby." She demanded sitting on the couch, patting a spot for me to join her.

"Mom, please don't do the baby talk, it drives me nuts." I expressed as I took a seat next to her.

"I'm sorry, but you are my baby and that's not going to change. Now tell mommy what's bugging you."

I let out a heavy sigh before responding.

"Mom, his job is degrading."

"I knew it, with a body like that and his flirtatious ways, he's a stripper isn't he?" She guessed.

"What? No, he's…"

"Never mind, don't tell me, I don't want to know. That's beside the point anyways. That doesn't matter." She insisted.

"What matters?"

"All that matters is how he makes you feel. How does he make you feel sweetie?"

"My heart flutters when his near, I forget to breath and the way he touches me…"

"Okay, that's enough information, I am your mother after all." She reminded me.

"Sorry, I forgot." I teased.

"Ha-ha, I know I'm not the most mature mother but I love you and I do want what's best for you."

"I know, I love you too, and Phil isn't so bad."

"Thank you, I'll be sure to tell him you said so."

We shared a laugh together, before coming in for another hug.

"I missed you." I whispered into the embrace.

"I missed you too baby."

* * *

**Note:**I would like to add a thank you to all my readers and reviewers. I can't believe I reached my goal. I hit over 500 reviews, it's crazy. My next goal is to reach 700. Care to help me out? ;)


	21. Piece of meat

**EPOV**

I finished working out on the treadmill. My shirt was covered in sweat, clinging to my chest and my muscles were sore and in much need of a break. I was about to call it a day when a woman with jet black hair, brown eyes and a fake tan, looking pretty dressed up for the gym headed over. She looked to be in her mid- thirties, still trying to rock the twenties look with her little baby pink hoodie jumpsuit, decorated with white rhinestones that actually spelled out the word pink. Her outfit looked brand new and definitely not something you would want to sweat in. She even had fake nails that were purposely painted pink to match her outfit.

"How much for a quickie?" She asked smugly.

"Excuse me?"

**How the fuck does she know what I do for a living?**

"Bad joke, sorry. I'm Kim." She greeted, giving me a smirk.

"Edward." I replied trying to be polite.

"Seriously though, how much?" She questioned, showing her persistence.

**Do I have hooker tattoo on my forehead or something?**

"I'm friends with Ms. Jenkins. She tells me you're a great lay." She claimed giving me suggestive eyes.

**Great, now my clients are trading me around like a piece of meat.**

"So, how much?" She continued to ask.

"It doesn't quite work that way. You have to…"

"I know I have to go through the agency, blah, blah, blah. I did that and they said you weren't listed anymore."

"That's true. I have a lot on my hands at the moment. I don't have time for another client, maybe in the future." I stated.

"Sure, nice meeting you anyways." She voiced before walking off.

**The nerve of some people.**

Irritated and tired, I headed to the locker room to take a shower, wanting to get refreshed. I quickly undressed, noticing I was the only one in there and turned on the closest shower.

* * *

I was half way through showering when I heard the door squeak open.

"Hey you." A female voice echoed across the room.

I snapped around in shock to find Kim coming over in nothing but a towel.

"What are you doing here?" I panicked, trying to cover myself.

"This is the men's locker room." I stressed.

"Really? I thought it was the woman's." She replied, before throwing her towel to the ground.

I froze not sure what to do. I never had been in that situation. I never had a woman who didn't take no for an answer. Sure, I had my fair share of stubborn clients but they knew if I said no, I meant no.

Before I could say anything she grabbed my dick and began to rub it.

"Stop." I said, trying to remove her hand but I couldn't. Her grip was solid and my dick betrayed me getting hard.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" She praised.

"Please stop." I voiced weakly, feeling my hips wanting to move with her hand movements. However I didn't move.

**I don't want this. **

**Why the fuck does my dick?**

"Awe, come on puppy."

**Puppy?**

**Now I'm a puppy?**

"I said stop!" I shouted angrily, slamming her back into the tiled wall in front of me.

"Oww! You'll pay for that asshole! Wait till your boss hears about this!" She yelled before taking off.

"Fuck!" I exclaimed, hitting the wall with my fist.

I winched in pain, looking at the mark it left.

* * *

**BPOV**

I opened the front door to find my friend, Alice, behind it. She was wearing a plain baby blue dress that ended at her knees and blue pumps that matched the dress perfectly. Her black spiky hair was dressed up as well with a little blue head band that had a bow on it and she finished the look off with a pair of black glasses. She looked like Minnie mouse, though in a fashionable, upscale way. I'm sure she was decked out head to toe in designer wear. She always did have a thing for fashion.

"Alice, what are you doing here?"

She wasted no time taking off her black Chanel glasses, showing me her annoyance.

"I have a bone to pick with you. I spent all Thursday night waiting and waiting for you to call. I figured maybe you were just busy and you would call me back the next day, Friday came and guess what? No call."

**Oh crap, I forgot!**

**Alice is going to kill me.**

"Alice I'm sorry, I wasn't avoiding you on purpose, things came up."

"Really, such as?" She demanded, taping her right pump on the ground as she waited for me to explain myself.

Alice wasn't one for being ignored. She was usually such a cheerful, fun person to be around, unless you got on her bad side.

"My mom is visiting." I answered.

"You expect me to believe that? She hasn't come to see you in ten years." She argued, giving me a disbelieving look.

"Bella, who's, oh you must be Alice. I recognized you from Bella's description. I'm Renee, Bella's mother." My mom said coming up from behind me to greet my friend.

Alice's face softened at her presence.

**Thank you mom.**

"Oh, well, hi. Yes, I'm Alice. So, Bella told you about me huh?"

"Only good things I assure you." My mom replied, giving Alice a warm smile.

Alice's returned back into her defensive form, giving me an inquiring look.

"I was starting to feel nonexistence to Bella. I can never reach her." She complained.

"Oh, I know what you mean. I write and I don't hear anything back till weeks later." My mom agreed.

"What is this, gang up on Bella day?" I asked feeling bullied.

"Sorry dear, but it's true. You're not great with keeping in touch with people." My mom retorted.

"Hey, I have an idea, how about a girl's day?" Alice suggested, returning back to the bubbly girl I know.

"I don't think that…" I started to protest but I was soon caught off by my mother.

"Yeah, that's a great idea." My mom pitched in.

"Mom, what about your flight?"

"Bella it's not till this evening. I would love too."

"Great, I can't wait to hear what you been up to Bella." Alice added, smiling mischievously.

**Oh, I'm in trouble.**

"Oh, yeah." I replied sarcastically.

* * *

After a couple of drinks and laughs about the past, Alice changed the subject.

"So, Bella, what's going on with you and this guy?" She questioned, putting me on the spot.

"Oh, are you talking about Edward?" My mom asked excitedly.

"You told your mom before me?" Alice asked, looking hurt that I didn't go to her first.

"I didn't tell her all the details, just the basics." I stated, trying to sooth my friend.

"At least she got his name, I didn't even get that." Alice whined.

"Actually, I met him too." My mom added.

"What?"

"Yeah, they would make such a cute couple." My mom went on unaware of the hole she was digging me into with my friendship with Alice.

**Thanks a lot mom.**

"Mom, don't start and Alice it wasn't a planned meeting, he just so happened to be with me when my mom surprised me with her company." I explained.

"Whatever." She spat.

"Oh, there's the waiter. I'm going to see what's taking so long on our orders. Don't say anything interesting till I come back." My mom lectured, before going off in search of our waiter.

The table filled with silence as Alice ignored me, looking through the menu. I picked at my napkin nervously. I had questions I desperately wanted to ask her but I was worried what she would think of me, worried she might think less of me or laugh at my innocence.

"Hey Alice, have you ever gave a guy…head?" I asked whispering the last word across the table, worried someone else might hear.

Alice's eyes widen in shock.

"What?"

"Edward asked if I would do it for him and I'm curious as to what it's like. I thought you might know."

"Yes, I have done it before. It's more for the guy though. The girl gets nothing out of it. That's why I always make sure if I do decide to go down on a guy, that I really like him and that I get something in return. It's only fair." She confessed.

"Get something in return, like what?" I asked curious.

"You know, get your pussy licked."

"Ewe, people do that?"

"Hey, don't judge until you try it, it's quite pleasurable. Besides, you think sucking on a guy's dick is any better?" She challenged arching an eyebrow at me.

"I don't find either appealing to be honest but I want to help Edward out."

"What do you mean help him?" Alice asked confused.

"His shrink told him to try getting a blowjob, to help him open up and try new things."

Alice laughed at the news.

"Oh my god, that's a good one. And you fell for that? Man, some guys will do anything for some lips on their dick."

"It's true." I argued.

"Bella, you're telling me you honestly believe a shrink told this guy to ask you to suck his dick?"

"Well, when you put it that way, no. But I trust Edward."

"Do you want to give him head?"

"I don't know, I mean, I really like him, a lot and I want to please him. I guess."

Girl, you need to make sure your one hundred percent sure before you agreed to this. Trust me; it takes a lot to swallow cum."

"Ewe, okay, now I lost my appetite."

Alice let out a laugh as my mother came back to the table.

"Okay girls, what did I miss?" She asked intrigued.

I looked towards Alice silently warning her to keep her mouth shut.

"Oh, nothing." She replied, smirking back.

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**EPOV**

I was still pretty shaken up with what happen at the gym even after I left. I started up my car and drove over to Bella's after I received a text from her. I had a lot on mind with the whole ordeal in the locker room and I needed a friend more than ever.

Bella opened the door for me, letting me inside.

"Hey." I greeted, looking around the corner, curious as to where her mother was and how much longer I had to act like the perfect gentleman.

The last thing I wanted to do was kiss someone's ass after everything that happened at the gym. I was irritated and frustrated and just wanted to vent my anger.

"Where's your mom?" I asked when I didn't see her.

"Oh, she left already. She was just here for the weekend." Bella stated, making her way to the living room.

I relaxed a little at the news, glad I didn't have to put on an act.

"Oh, so, umm, what's going on?" I asked trying to play the role of the friend, taking a seat on the couch, getting in a comfortable position.

I watched confused as Bella started to fidget in her spot. She looked more unglued than usual.

**What is she so nervous about?**

**Shit, I got my own issues to worry about.**

**What am I going to do about this Kim person?**

**Fuck, what if Jane finds out?**

"Well, I thought about your request." Bella said nervously.

"My request? You mean my shrinks request?" I corrected.

"Yeah." She replied, blushing.

"And?" I asked curious on where she was going with all of this.

I froze in my spot as Bella slide down to her knees. I flinched as she unzipped my jeans. Next, my pants and undergarments were pulled down, revealing my limp dick. Bella's eyed it curiously. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to concentrate on her and the effort she was giving but I couldn't. I was not turned on in the slightest. I could only think of the incident that happened earlier. Kim's face kept popping in my head the more I tried not to think about her.

Suddenly I felt a hand gently touch my shaft and I freaked. I just kept thinking of the scene over in my head. Kim smirking wickedly at my semi hard dick, her iron grip, tugging on it roughly, to the point it was uncomfortable and almost hurt, her completely ignoring my pleas. Me, bare for all to see, embarrassed and scared as to how far she would try to go. Scared no one would hear my struggles and come to help and scared of being a sex toy forever. I was starting to hate sex. It brought out the ugly, selfish side of people.

**I feel like I'm suffocating. **

"Stop!" I blurted out.

I couldn't take anymore humiliation or put Bella through the embarrassment herself. Wondering why she couldn't get me off.

"Why? What's the matter?" She asked frantic, thinking she did something wrong.

"I can't let you go through with this. I respect you too much." I stated before quickly zipping my jeans back up and helping Bella off her knees.

"But I thought you said…" She started to protest confused by my actions.

"I know what I said, but I can't. If I'm going to have your lips on any part of my body I rather they are on my own, rather than my dick." I confessed.

**I can't think of anyone touching my dick right now after what happened.**

"Edward, your hand." Bella voiced, gasping at the sight.

"It's nothing." I said, trying to hide my injured knuckles.

Bella brought the wounded hand up to her view. "You're bleeding."

I looked down in shocked to find indeed my knuckles were red with blood. Bella left the room only to later return with a first aid kit.

I watched in silence as she worked on my hand, bandaging it up.

"I should go. I have to get up early for work tomorrow." I stated once she finished wrapping my hand up.

"Why do you do that?" Bella asked, frustrated.

"Do what?"

"Shut me out. You're always leaving, why?" She demanded.

"You want me to stay?" I asked, shocked by her sudden mood change.

"I want you to be honest with me. That's what friend's do right?" She lectured.

"It's a defensive mechanism I picked up I guess. So I don't get hurt." I confessed.

"You think I'm going to hurt you?" She asked sadly.

"No, of course not, it's just a hard habit to break."

"So, you're staying?"

"Do you want me to stay?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"Then I'll stay."

We shared a smile in silence, before Bella lead the way to her bedroom. I waited for her to pick a side and get under the covers before heading over to the opposite side. Once I was in a comfortable spot, I felt the bed move and Bella's head rest on my chest. In response I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her closer to me. It was funny, Bella always seem to know what I needed, even without me saying a word. I let out a content sigh before sleep took a hold.

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**Note:** Reviews preferred. ;)


	22. The perfect match

**Note:** Okay, my wonderful helper got confused on the whole Jane being the boss. She was under the impression that Edward ran the show. So to avoid more confusion from readers I just wanted to state the facts quickly before you starting reading this chapter and got confused during Edward and Jane's talk.

Kami is Edward's secretary, he has his own area/office in the agency like the other Escorts that work there but he is not the head boss, Jane is. She employs all her workers and keeps tabs on what's going on with her company. She sort of stands in the background and lets her Escorts make their own clientele and choices as far as what they are willing and not willing to do with a client. She doesn't really care how her workers make her money as long as they do. Meaning if they cancel an appointment with a client for whatever reason, as long as Jane doesn't get a complaint from that person and as long as her Escorts make up the money lost, she doesn't care. Edward gets away with more stuff they most would being how he is one of her best Escorts. However, if someone steps out of line, for example: she hears a complaint from a client or they short her on money, she takes matters into her own hands. I also talk about Jane being the boss in chapter 16. If you get confused, I suggest you read back. I hope this helps any confusion. ;)

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**EPOV**

I woke up shivering; realizing Bella was no longer resting against me. I turned to find her on her side, her back facing me. I quickly scooted over, cuddling up to her backside. I wrapped my arms around her waist, loving the warmth it gave me.

It wasn't two seconds later the alarm went off. My eyes popped open at the loud disturbance and I tightened my hold on sleeping Bella, who was starting to show signs of waking up, shifting in bed. I heard her let out a sigh once she realized my embrace was keeping her from moving.

"Edward, are you up?" She asked groggily.

I squeezed my eyes shut pretending to sleep as I felt her body twist in my direction, turning to face me. I must have squeezed my eyes too tightly because Bella could tell I was faking.

"Edward, I have to go to work." She stressed.

I slowly opened my eyes trying to act like I just woke up but Bella knew better.

"Stay." I said, using Bella's words from last night.

Her eyes widened.

"What?"

"Stay, don't go to work today." I pleaded.

"I can't, not go to work, as much as I would love to spend the day lying in bed…" She said untying my arms from her waist, freeing herself from my grip.

"…I have bills to pay." She added.

I sighed at the loss, feeling cold again. The bed quickly lost its appeal with the lack of Bella by my side. It just seemed bigger, naked and nippy without her.

"Besides, don't you work today?" She asked, looking uncomfortable.

Work was the last thing I wanted to deal with right now. However, I did have to talk to Jane about what happened yesterday. I nodded in response before slowly getting out of bed.

**Time to face reality.**

**

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**

To my surprise, Jane knew of yesterday's big incident before I even opened my mouth to speak. It seems This Kim lady stuck to her word informing my boss of what went down. Of course, her side of the story was completely fabricated. She claimed I was the one to assault her and totally draw out my shove saying that she was left with a huge bruise on her back and that she was considering suing the agency.

Luckily, I have been working with Jane's company long enough for her to know I was a trustworthy, loyal worker. I'm sure Jane got threats of such things left and right. She seemed unconcerned by it. Unfortunately, I was still in trouble.

"You will take extra shifts until you make up what was lost." She stated coldly.

"Jane, she attacked me." I voiced, grabbing her attention.

She looked up from her desk; she was quiet, as if she was thinking something over.

"Did you go to the police?" She asked in a serious tone.

I may not have known Jane for more than a couple of years but I knew well enough to know her concern had nothing to do with me. She was a business woman after all. This agency was her life, one she would protect at all costs.

"No." I replied.

Jane relaxed at my comment, giving me a forced smile. She was never one for emotions, especially pleasant ones. Whenever she did smile, the happiness never reached her eyes and she always looked wicked. When she was upset, it was even worse. Her eyes were piercing, stabbing into you like knives.

It was crazy to think such a small woman could provoke such fear in people. Jane was great at finding people's weakness and hitting them hard if they did her wrong according to her. She had two big bodyguards if she needed them and connections around town. Most of the time she didn't need her men, they were mostly for show anyways. Jane was good at stirring her employees back on the right track all on her own. She was quite manipulative.

"Good. I know you didn't start it Edward but because of this bitch, we lost our client Ms. Jenkins and she threatened the company. Usually when a person does that I fire that employee. However, I like you Edward, I see you're potential."

**Potential in whoring, how flattering.**

"So here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to pay that stuck up bitch off to keep her mouth shut about our operation here and you will make up the money we lost. I have someone I want you to meet with tomorrow, her name is Victoria." Jane stated.

I gulped nervously. I heard about Victoria. She was a dominant freak, who liked the rough shit. Victoria came for our services once every other month. Jane gave her whichever employee disappointed her as a punishment and now it was my turn.

I never met Victoria but I heard from some colleagues who once had the pleasure or should I say pain of her company. They made sure to never disappoint Jane again after that.

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**BPOV**

I took a spot on my couch, tired after the long day I had at work. I was ready for some much needed relaxation. I took off my shoes and socks setting them to the side and searched my t.v. for something to watch. There wasn't much to pick from. I ended up settling on a crime show. They were talking about killers on the loose and these awful, unthinkable crimes that they committed.

I know it probably wasn't the best idea to be watching a crime program in the dark of night, alone. As weird as it sounds I found those shows interesting as much as they were terrifying. I guess I was in the mind set of that will never happen to me. I mean, I live in a very quiet, nice neighborhood.

I was in the middle of one of the stories when I heard a noise that sounded a lot like my front door squeaking opening. I became alert at the noise.

**What the fuck?**

**Did I forget to lock up?**

I quickly muted the volume on the television and looked around the corner. My heart was going a mile a minute.

**Relax Bella, your just imagining things.**

**You're watching a crime show, you're on high alert, It's normal.**

At the sound of footsteps across the floor, I was off the couch in a flash, looking around the room for something to use for protection, finding nothing useful.

**Shit!**

I nearly jumped when I saw Edward enter the living room.

"Jesus, Edward. You almost gave me a heart attack. Since when do you come into someones home without even knocking?"

"Sorry, I didn't think. Listen Bella, I really appreciate this friend's thing we have going on but I need you to be my client again, just a little bit longer." Edward announced taking a seat on the sofa.

It was clear he was stressed out about something. I didn't understand what was going on with him. Yesterday he looked completely freaked out when I barely touched him and his hand was pretty smashed up. My mind ran wild with possibilities, I thought maybe he got hurt in a fight with someone or got in some kind of accident.

I wanted to know what was wrong but at the same time I didn't want to push him away. I knew Edward was in a pretty vulnerable state. I was worried about him, afraid if he was pushed far enough he might attempt to hurt himself. So, I stayed quiet waiting for him to speak up.

It crushed me that Edward wanted me to be his client again. I felt like we were finally making progress with everything. He was seeing a therapist and seemed more relaxed and content. Now, it's like we were going backwards.

**What happened?**

"Why?" I asked taking a spot next to him.

"I kind of did something I shouldn't have and I owe my work some money." He claimed.

"Okay." I agreed.

I hated to see Edward upset. I decided right then and there I would do whatever I had to, to make him happy again, to fix the broken man I saw before me.

"Thanks." He replied, looking ashamed as got off the couch and started to undo his pants.

"Edward." I protested, placing my hands on top of his, stopping his movements.

"We don't have to have sex. I would be more than willing to give you the money if you need it."

Edward looked to be having an inner battle with himself. He looked relieved at my words but his hands stayed on his jeans apprehensively, as if, afraid of disappointing me.

"I have to give you something Bella, it isn't right to just take money from you." He said.

"Well, how about we talk? We have known each other a little over a month and I still don't know that much about you." I stated.

Edward zipped his pants up before taking a seat on the couch next to me.

"Okay, what do you want to know?"

"Well, you said you're into music. What do you play?" I asked intrigued.

"The guitar and I sing sometimes. Though I'm better at guitar."

"What about your parents, ever see them?"

"Yeah, everyone in a while. They live an hour away, so it's not like I can see them every day."

"Any siblings?" I asked curious.

"No, it's just me."

"You like being alone."

"That's not a question." He stated confused.

"No, I saw you at the restaurant that night I had my date. You looked content. Most people crave for socializing, having attention on them, but not you."

Edward started to get uncomfortable towards my findings.

"Well, I don't get much time to myself. So it's nice to be able to relax away from work. The people I meet aren't people I want to hang out with, apart from you." He confessed.

"What were you like in high school? Were you as good with the ladies back than as you are now?"

Edward laughed before answering.

"Yeah right, I wasn't a loner but I wasn't a jock either, contrary to how you think I am with women. I was actually nonexistent to girls."

"Come on." I voiced, playfully hitting his shoulder.

"I'm serious. I had a couple of wondering eyes but whenever they talked to me or I them, they would lose interest fast. No girl wants a guy who cares more about music then what's cool at the moment or them. I guess I was too weird and ambitious back then. I did have a couple of girlfriends but nothing serious. Music was my lady back then."

"Oh man, you are such a nerd." I expressed.

"Hey, this coming from a girl who never even had a boyfriend."

"Ouch, okay, fine, I guess I deserve that."

"What about you?"

"What about me?" I questioned.

"What were you like in high school?"

"Oh come on, it's pretty obvious isn't it?"

"Come on, tell me."

"I was the loner. I loved books more than people. They gave me an outlet to my lack of a life."

"Wow, and you rat on me. So, reading was your man so to speak."

"Yeah, I guess."

I laughed at the thought.

"Reading was my man and music was your lady, what a match we make. You should totally write a song about it."

"Are you making fun of me Miss Swan?"

"Maybe, whatcha gonna do about it?" I challenged.

I waited for Edward to make a move. Before I knew it he was attacking my sides with his hands, tickling me. I fell back on the couch, giggling and squealing at his touch. Edward hovered over me, getting in a better position to tickle me. After begging for mercy, Edward took pity on me and removed his hands. He watched amused waiting for my breathing to calm down.

It became quiet as we stared into each other's eyes. Suddenly I felt lips on mine, his lips. I welcomed the surprise pressing my mouth to his, loving the feel of his demanding, soft lips. I grabbed onto his hair to keep him in place, wanting to add my tongue, to feel his again. It had been so long. My tongue craved for his.

I moved to deepen the kiss when Edward broke away. I gave him a small smile, finding it hard to keep my excitement in. Edward's eyes widened as if he just realized what had happened.

"I've got to go." Edward voiced quickly, headed towards the door.

"Really?" I asked confused.

"I've got things to go and places to do." Edward replied as he opened the door.

"What?" I questioned, cracking up.

"I mean I've got…You know what I mean." He answered flustered.

"Bye nerd." I voiced, still laughing as Edward left.

**That must have been some kiss.**

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**Note: **Almost at 700 reviews! ;)


	23. The devil herself

**Note: **I just want to forewarn you guys before you read this chapter. There is some guy on guy action in this part. I personally have no problem with guy on guy sex scenes but I know some people are uncomfortable with the idea.

If you don't think you could stand to read of such things, don't read EPOV of his time with Victoria. The first half of this chapter is innocent, so you can read at least half without getting too grossed out.

However, if you have no problem and are brave enough and eager to read the whole chapter, by all means go ahead. I will warn you though, the scene is not pretty. Edward goes through a lot mentally as well as physically during this chapter and finally reaches his breaking point.

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**EPOV**

"Hello Edward." Dr. Roberts greeted from behind her desk.

I nervously made my way to the chair I became accustomed to, uncertain on whether I should sit down or run. I did not want to talk about the issues I was having with work, I did not what to relive them. The humiliation, the fear, the shame and I worried about revealing too much. I didn't want to get any of my co-workers in trouble and I didn't want Jane to know I was telling someone outside of work about my job.

It was forbidden for any employee of Jane's agency to talk about what we did outside of work, unless it was a future client, and we were just giving them the basics into what it was we offered.

It was a sticky situation to be in and getting stickier with this trip to Victoria's I had later today. I knew talking about Victoria was a big no, no. She was a precious client to Jane, precious because she had millions and was willing to give Jane a big chunk of change to do as she pleased to her purchased Escort of the moment.

If Jane so much as got a hint I was exposing information about her business, I would be in deep trouble. I didn't even want to think about what she was capable of. I was risking so much just by talking to a shrink.

It started to make me wonder whom could I really trust. Who was to say whether this Dr. Roberts was a therapist after all? She could have been an undercover cop building a case against my agency.

**Hell, a shrink would be the perfect cover for a cop.**

**There are plenty of Escorts messed up in the head from what our job entitles and just begging to spill all the information that is hush, hush.**

Jane never mentions to us, her workers, about there being any cops aware of our business, possibly snooping around. However, I can't help but wonder. She is always very careful, and always has her guards on lookout for anything strange around her building. She won't go anywhere near the establishment until her guards do a check out front as well as back and let her know all is clear.

Even my friendship with Bella was at risk. Letting myself kiss her didn't help matters much either. I didn't want her to get hurt. I couldn't tell her much about my life, being how a lot of it revolved around my job. I mean, Bella used to be a client of mine; it wouldn't be too hard for Jane to find out where she lived, her information was programmed into our computer at work and Jane has access to everyone's files. Sometimes, I felt like I worked for the mob or something, with all the secrecies there were about talking about escorting.

I could tell Bella of the man I was, but I can't tell her of the man I became, if you could even call me a man anymore. I'm more like a used toy, chewed up and spit out, client after client. I admire her determination with me, but I'm not worth her time or effort. If she knew all there was about me, what I felt on a daily basis, what I put up with for my job, she would be disgusted. I'm not the man she thinks I am, I haven't been for a while now. I'm a whore, paid to play a part. I'm not paid to feel or think. My opinions don't matter. I'm nothing, nothing but a toy.

"Tell me Edward how did your little experiment go? Did you give oral a try?" Dr. Robert s as intrigued, as if I would light up at the mention of the word.

**Sorry to disappoint you doc.**

My face remained blank as I answered.

"No, something happened, and I wasn't feeling it." I voiced as calmly as I could, hoping if I acted normal enough she wouldn't question me further.

My planned backfired. She was quiet. That was never a good sign. She scanned me over as if just by looking at me, she would get the answer to her unsaid question. She arched an eyebrow and began taping her pen against her desk. I felt like I was in the hot seat. I was antsy to move, though I stayed perfectly still, not wanting to indicate anything was wrong. She was trained to pick up on stuff like that.

"Tell me Edward, what happened?"

I remained silent for a good two minutes, when I snapped. I couldn't take the tapping noise of her pen, or the questioning looks I was getting anymore. It was like being under water with my air supply gone, needing to rise up to the surface and get a breath.

"Iwasassulted." I revealed in one breath, feeling better, lighter, now that I finally told someone other than Jane.

Dr. Roberts's eyes widen in alarm as I went on.

"I was working out at the gym; some girl recognized me as an Escort and wanted to fuck, for lack of a better word. I turned her down, being how it was my day off and there is a certain process clients have to go through in order to be a client. Anyways, she ambushed me in the locker room. It's not a big deal; I was able to fight her off before anything really happened. She just…"

I squeezed my eyes shut, shuddering at the memory.

"…She touched me a little, that's all."

"Edward, someone touching you against your will is quite serious; did you go to the police?" She asked concerned.

"No, but I told my boss, she'll take care of it." I replied, totally leaving out the part where I was getting punished for it.

couldn't help me anymore than a person off the street could, it was useless. It was a cruel tease actually. She wore a warm smile on her face, letting me in her office with its laid back feel. Giving me the illusion I was safe here, that no one could hurt me here, that I could say what was on my mind with no consequences. It was all a lie. She couldn't shield me if Jane found out I was talking to her, she couldn't numb my pain. All she could do was listen.

**Where is the help in that?**

I watched as Dr. Robert's view dropped down to my bandaged hand. She looked horrified.

"Edward, what happen to your hand, you didn't punch the lady did you?" She asked hesitantly, almost as if she already thought I did.

**Does she not know me at all?**

**Does she really think I'm capable of such things?**

"No, I would never do that." I replied somewhat defensive, trying to hide my hurt hand from her view.

"I'm sorry Edward, I had to ask. It's my job to make sure you're not a danger to yourself as well as society. When you said you didn't go to the police after the assault, I figured maybe that was why. That's my fault for assuming. I should know by now things aren't always as they appear to be. As a Therapist we are taught to find the truth in things. However, it's a hard habit to break. So how did you hurt your hand?"

I brought my wrapped hand out of hiding, as Dr. Robert's continued to eye it questioningly.

"After the assault, the lady claimed she was going to bitch to my boss about me shoving her off me. I was pissed off that she thought she could do something like that and everything would be fine and I was humiliated that I wasn't able to fight her off right off the bat. She was a small woman, who looked to be five foot five and I couldn't even loosen her grip on me. Anyways, there was no one there to talk about the incident and I was really upset, so I punched the wall. It hurt like a bitch but it was worth it, I had to get that emotion out somehow. Better I hurt myself than someone else."

"No, it's not Edward; it's not good to hurt yourself at all, no matter what the costs. Do you ever think about truly hurting yourself, you know, ending the misery as some people would say?" She asked carefully.

I had to laugh as her latest assumption.

**She actually thinks I would kill myself?**

**That's a good one.**

Dr. Roberts waited on the edge of her seat for my reply. I could tell she was two steps away from giving me a description drug and sending me to a Looney bin.

"No, I'm not crazy or suicidal. I don't have a death wish. I know that life isn't full of sunshine twenty four hours a day. I know there are going to be hard days and easy days, bad days and good days. In my field women have this misunderstanding, they think because I work in the sex industry and get paid to have sex that it's okay to touch me when and where they want. It comes with the job." I stated dryly.

"And how does that make you feel?"

"Honestly, sometimes I just feel like cutting off my dick and handing it over, so women will get what they're after and leave me alone." I confessed.

Dr. Roberts face was priceless. She looked disturbed on so many levels. Her mouth was ajar as if she wanted to say something but no words were coming out.

I let out a forced chuckle.

"Relax doc, I'm kidding."

I wasn't kidding and she knew it. I would never resort to anything that drastic but I did feel that way from time to time. That maybe if I didn't have this thing Women wanted, a dick, I would be left in peace.

"Let's move on, how is everything going with Bella?" She asked intrigued and almost eager to change the subject.

"Fine, I guess. We're still friends." I said, tracing along the edge of my gauzed covered hand.

"Did Bella bandage you up after your incident Edward?"

"Yeah, she's a very caring person. She would make a good mom, one day." I admitted.

Dr. Roberts gave a small smile at this.

"I would like to meet Bella. Is that okay?"

I stiffen up at the news.

**Why does she have to talk to her?**

**What the hell is she going to tell her?**

Dr. Roberts was quick to notice my panic form.

"I will not share anything that we talk about with her. I promise Edward. I would just like to get to know this girl that you talk so much about more, to possible understand you better. If you don't mind that is."

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**BPOV**

It was another day at the book cart going section to section, placing the returned books back in their rightful places, when I greeted by the best sight I had seen all day. My heart was jumping for joy as soon as I saw Edward walk through the front entrance. The bell jingled away on the door as if to inform people that a hottie was present.

I watched from my spot as he scanned the room over, his eyes stopped once they landed on me, making me melt. Marge reached me before Edward did.

"Yes Marge?"

"Don't yes Marge me; I know that boy is here to see you. I remember him from the last week."

I rolled my eyes as Marge went on. Supposedly one of our visitors of the library saw Edward and I getting a little touchy, feely last Thursday and thought it was in their best interest to report it to Marge. She has been watching me like a hawk ever since.

"Now, find out what he wants and make it quick, I don't want any monkey business going on, and we have work to do." She lectured before heading back to her desk.

I had to fight the urge not to roll my eyes, before I headed over to where Edward was waiting.

"Hey you, what are you doing here?" I asked playfully, giving his shoulder a light nudge.

Edward's eyes were glued to something behind me, looking nervous. I turned around to find Marge giving us disapproving looks. I turned back around to face Edward. He snapped out of his trance reaching my eyes.

"Oh, umm, I have a question. Well, actually my shrink has a question for you."

"Okay, what?"

I watched as Edward's eye moved towards the floor and he began to fidget.

"Well, she wants to know if you will meet with her, you know one on one." He stated.

**What?**

**His shrink wants to talk with me?**

**Why?**

**Oh god, what if she tells me Edward is a lost cause?**

**What if she thinks I'm some sick person for paying for such services?**

**What if she thinks I helped make Edward the way he is today?**

**Oh god, maybe I did.**

"Oh, okay." I voiced unsure.

It may be uncomfortable to bare my soul to a therapist and have her judge my decisions but I was willing to do it if it was going to help Edward. I was scared what I would hear but at the same time I was curious and somewhat eager to hear a professional's advice and thoughts on the whole situation.

**Who better to talk to about such things?**

**

* * *

**

**EPOV**

After getting Bella's okay to proceed with the whole meeting with my shrink, I headed on my way to my next task. Victoria.

Her house was a mansion. It was all marble and was abundant with rooms.

A man opened the door for me after one knock. I guess Victoria had her staff high on alert for visitors, either that or she was anxious to start. I gulped as my eyes met his. He had short, dirty blonde hair, bright blue eyes and a wide smile that almost looked involuntary, though he showed no signs of being forced against his will. His outfit, if you could call it that, was made of leather. He was wearing a black leather vest with no shirt underneath, showing off his well tone chest and wore matching black leather pants.

I assumed he was Riley. Jane told me all about Riley, Victoria's personal boy toy. Why she felt she needed another toy for her pleasure, I wasn't sure, and I wasn't about to question her either. My faith lay in her hands; it was kind of a terrifying thought. I had to obey Victoria's every command if I wanted to get back on Jane's good graces. I had to be a good boy. Hopefully if I was obedient, Victoria would take it easy on me.

"Hi, I'm Edward; I believe Victoria is waiting for me?" I voiced weakly, feeling overwhelmed.

Riley remained quiet, he nodded in response, gesturing me to follow him to where Victoria was. She had a good amount of house workers from what I could see. I spotted people putting the finishing touches on her well groomed lawn when I arrived. She had a couple of maids, dusting furniture when I came in and of course she had very own boy toy.

I looked around the massive house in awe. Statues stood in the center of every room, as the focus point of the area. The place most have cost a fortune.

I followed Riley up the stairs to the second floor and headed to a darkened room off to the right. The door was cracked open, as if a silent invite for us to enter. I was somewhat hesitant to see what was waiting for me on the other side. I pictured some crazy women dressed in a leather outfit as well, with whips and chains, ready to let all hell loose.

I took a breath before finding the strength to enter. Riley took that as his cue to leave, making me enter the room alone and unprotected, not that he would protect me, but I would have definitely felt more comfortable if it wasn't just me going inside.

I looked to the left and right of me not sure what I would see. Relief instantly washed over me. There were no chains or whips in the room, just a bed. I spotted a woman across the room sitting in a chair. Her hair was fire red, her eyes were a deep brown and she was wearing a white, silk negligée, making her look almost angelic. It was not at all what I pictured. My tense form relaxed at the discovery.

"Edward, my, my, you are a looker aren't you. Turn around dear so I can see all the goods." She commanded, rotating her finger around in a circle as she said the words.

I did as told feeling Victoria's controlling ways peeking through. Once I spun around Victoria gave me firm orders to undress and get on the bed, facing her direction. Though wary, I did as told. I sat on my knees, giving myself some space between the mattress and I, and waited for her next instruction, hoping my punishment wouldn't be too bad.

"Pleasure yourself Edward." She commanded.

I closed my eyes, thinking back to Bella at the library, how cute she looked, cute enough to want to touch her again. My dick jerked at the thought. I reopened my eyes so Victoria wouldn't get offended with my lack of attention and started to pump my shaft, meeting her hard stares.

Victoria's killer gaze wasn't helping my problem; my dick was losing interest fast. I closed my eyes again for a minute or two trying to concentrate on the feeling of my shaft being tugged when I suddenly felt something poking firmly into my ass trying to enter. I screeched in pain jumping at the feeling and clamped my butt.

**Ah!**

I looked back to find Victoria now behind me, with a lube finger running over my sensitive hole.

"Edward open up for me, clinching will only make it worst." She warned, trying to push her slick finger into my ass.

I did as told feeling the digit being thrust into my tight hole. I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut in pure pain, as Victoria worked on stretching my hole.

**My ass feels like it's being ripped apart.**

"You're so tense Edward. You need to loosen up." She stated as she switched her finger for a lube toy instead and began the process all over again.

**I have a dildo up my ass, what do you expect?**

**God, this fucking hurts!**

After a couple of minutes of torture, Victoria began to move the toy in a back and forth motion. I was panting hard and my knuckles were turning white from the grip on my dick. I didn't even realize I was still jerking myself off until Victoria spoke.

"Edward, if you continue to squeeze your dick like that, you won't have a dick for much longer."

It was true. The blood flow to my shaft was cut off from my solid hold. My dick looked ready to pop from constriction. I loosen my hold, cursing at the hand print that my shaft was now sporting.

Unexpectedly, Victoria turned the toy to the side, slanting it slightly. It started to hit my sensitive prostate. I gasped at the newfound feeling. It felt good.

**What the fuck, a dildo feels good?**

**Am I gay now?**

Moan after moan came out, as I worked on my dick to match the pleasure I was feeling elsewhere.

"That's it Edward, let go." Victoria praised.

"Fuck!" I called out, cumming hard all over her black satin sheets.

I worked on calming my heavy breathing as Victoria examined her bedspread.

"Tisk, tisk. Edward, look at the mess you made. Clean it up."

My eyes widen at her orders. I knew what she was asking for. Victoria's eyes were wild with excitement as she noticed my horrified ones. It was as if she loved to torture people, push them pass their limits.

I slowly leaned down and licked a small portion of my substance off the bed.

"Swallow." Victoria demanded; now back in her chair across the room.

I shuttered in disgust as I swallowed my own cum. The little torture was enough for Victoria and luckily she didn't ask me to continue.

"Good boy, now for the real fun." She announced, her eyes lighting up at the thought.

I stiffen in my spot.

**There's more?**

I felt the bed move behind me, realizing I wasn't the only one on the bed anymore. Victoria's smile widened.

I didn't move. Panic hit me.

"Relax Edward, you might actually enjoy yourself." Victoria voiced from her spot.

I didn't dare turn around. I was too scared to see who joined me. Then I felt it. It wasn't a toy. It was big, warm, hairy and erect. It was the real thing. The stranger leaned forward, causing his chest to press into my back. He silently grabbed one of my hands and placed it down on the bed; I got the hint and got down on my hands and knees. I was on pins and needles as I heard the sound which could only be describe as a wrapper being torn. At least he had protection.

**What the fuck would he need protection for?**

"Whoa, I can't do this. I don't do guy on guy stuff." I stressed, staring straight at Victoria.

She narrowed her eyes, looking displeased. She began to tap her nails against the armrest of her chair as she spoke.

"Edward, do you want Jane to find out you were uncooperative? Do you want her to find out I was unsatisfied with your services?"

I shook my head no, not able to find the words. I was shaking with the knowledge of what I was agreeing to do, allowing to be done to my body.

"Now, I'm quite aware you've never been with a guy, I actually prefer my men that way. Now, be quiet and act like a good little boy and maybe you will enjoy yourself." She lectured before giving her man a nod to continue.

I yelped as the stranger slammed into my tight hole. I gripped the sheets in front of me as the unknown man continued to thrust into me. I felt his manly, hairy legs against mine. I felt his balls slap among mine every time he plunged into me. I could hear his determined pants along with my pained ones. I could feel his dick tear me apart from the inside out. It was painful and my ass was burning in protest against his rough actions.

**Fuck, this hurts!**

**Shit, how much longer?**

I squeezed my eyes shut trying to think of anything but the pain. It wasn't an easy thing to do, the pain was everywhere and it seem to have no end in sight, the man seem to have no end in sight. My eyes welled up with water threatening to run down my face. I grunted out in pain, which only further encourage the man behind me, working hard and faster. My arms were shaking, threatening to buckle, I couldn't take much more.

"That's it, cum for me." Victoria voiced from her seat, as she watched with eager eyes.

**Cum, is she fucking crazy?**

**Who the fuck is going to cum from this torture?**

It wasn't two seconds later the man behind me screamed out in pleasure. After he had his fill, he pulled out of me, I winched at the feeling. I was so tender. It hurt just to move an inch. I collapsed on the bed, exhausted and sore.

I looked over curious to find none other than Riley, on the other side of the bed. He gave me a small smile before pulling his pants back up and moving over to stand by Victoria's side.

"Good job Edward, not many people can handle my style. I'll let Jane know you were a good patient." Victoria praised as she got up her spot.

"Thanks." I voiced weakly, not really knowing why I was thanking her.

I guess I was just glad it was done and over with, and that she was actually going to say I was good rather than bad and get me into more trouble.

I watched on edge as she came closer. I closed my eyes waiting for her next move. The bed made a small plump noise and I opened my eyes, curious. There on the bed was a big stack of money. I sighed in relief.

"You earned it." She stated before playfully slapping my ass.

I bit my lip to keep from screaming out in pain, as Victoria and her boy toy left me to recuperate.

My chest was shaking from my sobs. I muffled my cries into a pillow, not wanting anyone to hear. I cried till I have nothing left to cry. I felt numb.

Once I found my strength back I slowly put my clothes back on, careful not to cause any more pain to my injuries. I hissed at the stinging feeling I felt as I limped down the stairs.

**I can't do this anymore.**

**What am I even doing this for?**

* * *

**Note: **I don't know if you guys are aware of the issue with this site. For the past three days this site has been acting up and giving me as well as a lot of other writers problems updating on stories. If you are one of these people having a hard time updating, I would like to share with you information I was informed with on how to get around the issue and still be able to update on stories, until this site figures out how to fix the problem.

Upload your doc to the document manager and get it all ready, just like

usual.

- Go to My Stories, click EDIT on the right side of the story you want.

- When you get the error message, go to the address bar across the top where

it says something along the lines of

login(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/storystory_edit_property(dot)php?storyid=NUMBERHERE

- Delete the word PROPERTY and add in the word CONTENT in its place. Hit

Return.

- It should take you to the page where you can choose what chapter to add to

your story. Do that like you regularly do and then continue like normal. It

should post your chapter.

Also, I want to give a special thanks to Beegurl13 for helping me out and to Weekitty for trying to help me with my problem As well as a thanks to Twilight44. ;)


	24. Quitting

**BPOV**

There was a soft knock at my front door. I opened it to find none other than Edward behind it. His face was blank; he came in without saying a word. I took my spot back on the couch, scanning his clothes over questioningly. Edward was in his work attire which was wrinkled and disheveled. He looked like he just rolled out of bed.

"Did you just finish a job?" I asked curious, considering how late it was.

I waited silently for Edward's reply, as I continued watching television. I turned my attention away from the screen when I didn't get an answer. I found him standing next to the sofa, eyeing the bathroom, as he rubbed his arms.

"Oh, you can wash up if you want, I don't mind." I voiced.

I watched as he cautiously made his way to the bathroom, taking slow, calculated steps which I found odd and then closed the door half way. Afterwards, I heard the sound of running water and decide to give Edward his privacy, returning my eyes on the movie in front of me.

Something wasn't right. I started to add things together in my head. Edward was wearing a wrinkled suit; I've never seen Edward wear messy clothes before. It was a big deal to look his best for his clients. Edward was acting strange, very quiet, another first.

Five minute flew by; I couldn't take the silence anymore. I headed over to the bathroom to make sure Edward was okay. When I glanced through the opening my eyes caught sight of Edward wincing in pain as he slid off his pants.

**Shit, did something happen?**

**Did he get in a fight?**

**Did someone jump him?**

**First his hand and now this.**

"Oh my god Edward! What happened?" I gasped seeing he was in agony, opening the door fully for me to enter.

His eyes widened at my arrival as if his secret was exposed.

"Here, let me help you?" I said taking an arm helping him into the water filled tub.

Edward hissed as his skin came in contact with the warm water. I got in behind him sitting on the ledge of the tub with my legs resting on either side of him. My feet were the only part of my body that touched the water.

I watched as he leaned his body forward in an arch form. I wasn't sure if it was out of pain or shame or maybe both. I leaned down and placed a small kiss on the middle of his back, where his shoulder blades met.

Edward flinched at the touch, tensing. I sighed at this, grabbing a nearby wash cloth. I soaked it with the warm bath water before running it against his back, concerned on being gentle not wanting to cause any unnecessary discomfort. Edward relaxed under the warm cloth.

"You want to talk about it?" I asked carefully, not wanting to push him.

Edward shook his head no.

"You know I'm here if you ever want to talk."

He nodded again, staring straight ahead at the tiled wall in front of him as I continued to clean and try to heal his invisible wounds.

It broke my heart to see him so messed up. Edward was showing no emotions at all, it scared me. I felt the tears threatening to come.

**Has he finally reached his limit?**

**Did he snap?**

**Does he think he deserves this?**

Filled with concern, I dropped the wash cloth and wrapped my arms around his bare back, ignoring the fact, he was tensing up at under my touch, ignoring the fact, he had yet to mention what happened and ignoring the fact, that he might not feel for me what I felt for him. It didn't matter. What mattered, was him knowing he didn't deserve to be treated like a whore, what mattered, was him feeling loved and wanted and what mattered, was getting him better.

I dried him off. He winced a little but said nothing and allowed me to pull his boxers up.

"Go get some sleep; I'm sure you're tried. I'll be there soon; I just have to clean up here first." I stated.

Edward said nothing leaving me alone in the bathroom and with my thoughts. The tears suddenly hit me.

**Does he even care about me being by his side?**

**Does he even want me there?**

**Am I delusional thinking he would want a shoulder to cry on?**

**Maybe he wants his privacy?**

**Does he even realize I'm here?**

Unexpectedly Edward came back, standing by the door frame.

"Bella…" his voice sounded weak and tired.

I quickly dried my eyes and turned to face him.

His eyes were dead; there was no sparks, no shine in them at all. His face remained blank and he seemed to have very little life left in him.

"…Thank you."

"Yeah, sure, just give me a minute." I strained.

He nodded before he headed out.

I had to get a grip. Here I was taking something that had nothing to do with me and making it about me. My feelings would have to wait. It was my job to be there for Edward. Whatever he needed me to be I would be. He deserved that much.

I came to my room finding Edward sleeping peacefully on his side. I smile a little at the sight and brought the covers up over him to warm him up.

I lay on my back staring at the ceiling unable to sleep. I worried and wondered how Edward would be the next day. If he would still be fucked up or if he would do a totally turn around and if so, would he be faking, acting like all was fine?

**Is this something that happens often?**

**Is this how he copes?**

**Will it happen again?**

My head hurt from all the questions swarming around and my appointment with doctor Roberts was tomorrow.

**What would she say?**

**Should I mention Edward's condition?**

**What did he tell her about his job that I know nothing about, what secrets, what fears?**

I pondered over the possible answers, rolling on my side before sleep finally hit me.

* * *

My thoughts on how Edward would be this morning were worse than I thought. He wasn't better, he wasn't worse, he was gone. There was no note, nothing.

Now I had to worry about where he was on top of everything else.

I called Edward's cell a couple of times but only got his voice mail.

"Beep: -Edward! Call me as soon as you get this, I'm worried about you. I mean ,you came over looking like death last night not saying a word and leave this morning without any explanation of where you're going or if you're okay. I mean, who does th-" I sighed frustrated as his voice mail cut me off.

* * *

**EPOV**

"She had a GUY fuck me! You KNOW I don't fuck guys! I told you from the start- I sleep with women ONLY!" I argued, finding it hard not to bitch Jane out.

She didn't look surprised by my comment. She didn't even blink. Jane's face showed her trademark, dull expression.

"I'm sorry you had to endure that Edward, really, but you knew of her crazy reputation, you should have been somewhat prepared. I told Victoria you were needed back at work as soon as possible so to take it easy on you. Victoria's form of easy and ours are two different things. You were lucky; she usually goes for more violent routes, like human bondage and has been known to leave a bruise or two."

"So… what, I'm supposed to be thankful, is that what your fucking telling me?" I asked in disbelief.

Jane sighed looking annoyed.

"The point is, it's over and done with. You learned your lesson, you satisfied your client and now we can move on from this." She voiced, returning her gaze to her papers, completely ignoring my feelings on the subject.

She didn't care about me. She didn't give a damn if I ended up dead, as long as she got paid at the end of the service.

"Jane, I'm done man whoring."

"Escorting." she corrected, not bothering to look up from her files.

"I don't want to do this anymore, here's the money I owed you." I said, tossing the stack of dough on top of her work papers.

Jane was quick to snatch the pile of cash off her desk and count it. Once satisfied it was all there she smiled to herself, placing the money in her bottom drawer for safe keeping. Her eyes met mine again as she spoke acting as if she cared about my well-being.

"Edward, you were once my most money hungry employee asking for double shifts, what happen? You suddenly grew a brain overnight? I don't think so." She retorted.

"Jane, I'm done." I snapped.

Her eyes narrowed and her lips tighten in a thin line. Finally seeing I was being serious.

"Okay, let's say that you are over this whole thing, what are you going to do instead?"

"I'm going to go back to college." I replied feeling like finally a weight had been lifted.

"Jane laughed harshly before speaking.

"Really Edward, at what, twenty nine?"

"Twenty seven." I corrected, annoyed she didn't even know how old I was.

"Let's be honest here Edward, whoring is all you know." She voiced bitterly.

"I know a lot of others things too but you're to stuck on yourself to see that." I barked.

"Well aren't you ballsy, but then again I already knew that." Jane declared.

I cringed at the thought, trying to forget the fact she saw me naked or touched me before.

"Okay Edward, since you put up a good fight, I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'll let you quit if you so desire, but I have a condition if you do. You will have to finish your contract which shouldn't be too hard for you. It's only a week before it expires. Take the time to really think if this is what you want to do. Now, if you still feel the same by next week then I'll let you go, willingly. You can go back to school and be in denial about having an actually successful career. However, if you do decide to leave you can never see any of our clientele again. It's a rule I have here, I don't want my business going elsewhere. Another thing, you can't go babbling to the authorities about my operation here either. If you do, I drag you down along with this place, got it." She warned.

"Yes."

"Good, you can go now. Have fun man whoring, as you so kindly put it."

* * *

**BPOV**

I headed inside the small building wondering how Edward felt going there his first time. I had a sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach. The smell of cleaner was strong in the air. The waiting room had bright white walls; it almost hurt to look at them and the receptionists behind the counter were young, smiley faced ladies, looking fresh out of high school.

While I was waiting to see the doctor I got a text from Edward easing some of my nerves.

_Sorry about earlier, I had something I had to do, I will see you later._

_E _

**Well at least I know he is alright. **

"The doctor will see you now." A young blonde stated, bringing my attention back to where I was.

I was taken to the main office which had a nice homey vibe to it with warm colors and was greeted by Doctor Roberts herself. She seemed like a very nice older woman. I sighed in relief feeling my stress dissipate.

"Okay, you're probably wondering why I asked you come." She said taking a seat in her chair.

"Well, Yeah." I replied, curious.

"Edward talks a lot about you and as my client it's important to understand where Edward is coming from and how he interacts with other people and deals with things on a daily basis. In other words, it is pretty tough to get him to open up and I figured since the two of you seem close, you might be able to give me more insight into who he is, so I can better help him."

I nodded in understanding.

"And plus, I have to admit I was curious about this girl Edward can't stop talking about."

I blushed.

"So tell me about yourself Bella?"

* * *

**EPOV**

I walked down the hall as fast as my legs would take me, which wasn't very quick considering my ass was still aching from yesterday's torture. I made my way over to my little office in search of Kami. She was quick to spot me and gave me her usually smile on my way in.

"Good morning Mr. Cullen." She greeted as if it was a beautiful day out.

I couldn't even imagine what a nice, honest lady like her was doing in this industry. I mean, sure she was a secretary, doing desk work only. However, knowing what she knew about this place, I'm surprised she didn't haul ass in the opposite direction.

"Morning." I mumbled, trying to sound friendly.

I didn't have a problem with Kami after all. She was just an innocent by stander. I proceeded to my desk pulling out my schedule for the week.

**I can do this.**

**It's just one more week, one more week of pretending, one more week of being treated like shit and one more week of taking orders.**

**Fuck, I can't do this!**

**Fuck it!**

I through my planner down on my desk and began clearing any and all of my personal belongings. Kami watched curious from her spot as I boxed some stuff. I motioned her over.

"Kami."

"Yes sir?" She asked eyeing my box of things.

"I won't be here for the rest of the week, please cancel any appointments I have for the remainder of this week and don't make any new ones for next week either."

Kami made notes as I spoke, giving me a questioning look at my last comment.

"Oh, umm, are you going on vacation sir?" She asked trying not to be too nosy.

"No, I'm, I'm quitting." I stated.

Kami went from being surprised and pleased in a matter of seconds.

"Good for you, I always knew you were too good for this place." She voiced, making sure not to be too loud, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention.

"Thank you, you would be smart to follow my lead." I replied.

"Oh, don't worry about me, I have other options."

"Bye kami." I said grabbing my box of stuff.

"Bye Edward, take care."

* * *

**BPOV**

"Hi, I'm Doctor Candy." I voiced softly, feeling my nerves getting the better of me.

Doctor Roberts told me I should try role play with Edward. That maybe the reason we were unsuccessful in the oral department was because we took it too seriously and found it hard to see us doing something like that to each other. She said that role play was a fun and safe way to express yourself sexually with your partner and thought it might work for us. So, there I was looking and feeling like a complete idiot for Edward.

**Is there anything I won't do for him?**

**Nope, it's official, I'm whipped.**

"Candy?" Edward repeated, clearly amused at the name choice.

Dr. Roberts also said it was important to pick names that weren't your everyday common name, so that it was easier for you and your partner to establish what's real and what's not, so not to blur the lines between reality and fantasy.

I always felt Candy was a sexy, mysterious, bad girl name.

"I don't know." I answered flustered, beginning to doubt my choice.

"No, I like it." Edward praised.

I tried hard not to roll my eyes. Of course he would like the name, it screamed easy.

"What brings you in today?" I asked, trying to stick to my part.

"Well Candy, I've been feeling a lot of pain down here, lately." Edward expressed, pointing to his pant covered dick.

"I see, well, let's see what I can… I can't do this. This is stupid." I protested from my spot.

"It's not, you're doing fine. Most women find role playing empowering." Edward stated from his seat.

"Well I find it humiliating." I confessed.

"Bella please, for me, will you at least try?"

"Fine, where does it hurt again?"

"Right here." He said grabbing my hand and placing it on his semi hard dick.

"I see. Massage Therapy is a great way to ease the pain. Have you ever tried it?" I asked, arching an eyebrow.

"No, I'm not familiar with it, can you show me doctor?" Edward asked innocently.

"It's very simple. You just want to rub the area back and forth." I stated, before placing the palm of my shaky hand down on his arousal.

"Shit." Edward voiced, closing his eyes at feeling.

"Pay attention Mr. Cullen, I'm only going to show this once." I playfully warned.

Edward was quick to open his eyes.

"Sorry doc, I was distracted, go ahead."

I put light pressure on his shaft and began to move my hand against the material of his jeans, causing friction.

"Fuck." Edward voiced, causing me to tense up.

"Did I hurt you?" I asked worried, halting my actions.

"No, keep going." He voiced huskily.

With his cue to go on, I silently got on my knees and unzipped his jeans. Edward eagerly helped me pull them past his thighs along with his underwear. His dick sprung to life before my very eyes.

I summoned all the courage I had to wrap my small hand around his hard shaft.

"Fuck Bella." Edward moaned on contact.

I swallowed hard, feeling intimidated.

"What do I do?" I asked, looking up at him.

Edward gulped before answering, his hands gripped the sides of the couch, trying to gain some control.

"Do whatever feels natural."

**Feels natural? **

**None of this feels natural.**

I licked the tip of his dick and was rewarded with a groan. With no further instructions on what to do I decided to stick to what obviously felt good to him, flicking my tongue against the tip over and over again. Groan after groan escape Edward's mouth.

"Shit, stop, stop!" He protested.

"What, what's wrong?" I panicked.

"You're licking me like a lollipop." Edward stated through pants.

"Is that wrong?" I questioned dumbfounded.

He snickered at my cluelessness.

"It's good to start with but you have to yank my dick after a while, otherwise it's just torture." He stated.

"Oh, sorry."

"Try to suck the tip a little, then when you get more comfortable take a little more into your mouth." Edward instructed.

I did as told, sliding the tip between my lips and lightly sucked.

"Good… yeah… okay now start moving your mouth back and forth."

"Like this?" I asked before slowly bobbing my head in an up and down motion in the air.

"Yeah, but with my dick in your mouth." Edward chuckled.

"Oh." I blushed embarrassed before placing my lips on his shaft again using the method he taught me.

"Yeah, uh, like that." He panted as he gently moved his hips up towards my mouth, being careful not to be too forceful.

I worked my jaw muscles around Edward's dick, back and forth, in and out, pulling out and sliding in. My cheeks were starting to get sore from all the work.

"Don't stop." He whined as I withdrew my mouth from his dick.

"Wait."

"What?" he questioned, clearly sexually frustrated.

"How long do I do this for?" I asked.

"I'll let you know when I'm gonna cum okay." Edward stressed.

"Oh, okay." I replied before going back to work on his shaft.

Luckily for me it only took a few more thrust of his hips and sucks from my mouth for Edward to reach his end.

"Uh, fuck!" Edward exclaimed.

He tapped my shoulder informing me to move. I did as told and watched amazed as his hand gave his shaft a couple of quick short jerks before spilling his cum all over his stomach. A few drops even landed on his thighs.

After quickly going to the bathroom and cleaning himself up Edward returned, cleaned and with his pants back on.

"Your turn." He stated.

"My turn?" I repeated confused.

Edward took me by surprise pulling me towards him; he worked quickly on undressing me. Soon I was completely naked and sitting on the couch, I watched intrigued as Edward's tongue peeked out moisturizing his lips, before speaking.

"On your stomach." He demanded.

I gave him a confused look but did as told, lying face down on the sofa.

"Welcome, my name is Alexander and I'll be your masseuse for the day. Tell me, where are your problem areas?" He asked huskily in my ear, sending shivers down my body.

"Here?" He asked, tracing my spine with his fingers only to replace them moments later with his tongue, sliding it teasingly down the curve path of my back, stopping once he reached my ass.

"Or here?"

My heart rate grew in anticipation as I felt his hands massage the skin of my upper thighs, his breath fanning out over the area.

I bit my lip to suppress a moan as I felt his body hover over mine.

"Turn around Bella and you'll get a treat." He whispered near my ear.

I did as told though had a hard time with my legs which felt like jello not to mention every brush against the couch was one step closer to me cumming. I was so sensitive down below.

Once on my back I was met with Edward's intense gaze. I wanted nothing more than to kiss him fiercely. I watched on edge as Edward smirked, spreading my legs wide open. "What, oh god… are you…?" I stressed.

**Is he really going to do what I think he is?**

His face soon disappeared between my limbs. Only the top of his head and wild hair could be seen. I nearly jump feeling the slippery sensation of his tongue entering my vagina. It was an odd yet arousing feeling.

Soon his experimental licks turned into full on mouth contact, letting his tongue slide in deeper, exploring sensitive places inside me I didn't even know existed. I moaned and squirmed against his powerful tongue, feeling his slippery warmth glide between my wetness.

"Uh, Edward."

I groaned in protest as he withdrew his tongue.

"You like that Bella?" he teased, knowing perfectly well I was close to climax.

I nodded eagerly.

I threw my head back as the feel of his skillful tongue returned.

"Uh, yeah." I moaned as his tongue started to thrust in and out my vagina.

My hands immediately went to his hair tugging at it. I looked down curious as he continued his actions while staring intensely at me. He picked up speed lapping at any and all untouched skin.

"Uh, uh, oh, my."

Suddenly I felt him bite down.

"Ah!" I screamed out at the erotic action, feeling my walls clenching.

I grinded up against his mouth as he sucked hard on my vagina, making sure to get every last drop of cum.

Once done, Edward rose from his spot, a smirk covered his face. My legs were still shaking from my high as I worked on fixing my uneven breathing. I panted exhausted and sexually satisfied. I closed my eyes trying to calm my pounding heart.

Two minutes passed in silence.

"You okay?" Edward finally asked, waking me from my high.

A lazy smile spread across my face.

"Yeah."

"Wow, that good huh?" He Joked.

* * *

**Note:**Reviews are like chocolate, sweet and irresistible. Yeah, I just made that up, lol! ;)


	25. One step forward, two steps back

**Note: **I was going to wait to post this chapter because I needed my helper to check spelling and grammar. However, I know she has been having computer problems and I'm not sure when she will be back online. So, I'm posting this chapter now and I probably will end up fixing or adding a thing or two after I hear back from her.

* * *

**EPOV**

I looked down at Bella's perky breast; her nipples were pink and hard with arousal and her chest was heaving from her pants. Her hair was a wild mess, spread out around her shoulders, covering parts of the couch. Her cheeks were flushed with color. I could smell Bella's sweet scent from where I was sitting. Even in her condition, with her arousal thick in the air and with drops of sweat lying on her forehead and in between her breasts, she still smelt like lavender and roses to me.

It was incredible, after everything that had happened to me, from dealing with the girl at the gym to Victoria and after everything that I had just experienced with Bella sexually, my body still reacted to her. I still wanted her.

I lay my head on Bella's bare chest listening to her fast heart rate, waiting for her body to calm down from its high. I closed my eyes as I took in the sound of her beating heart. The loud pounding gradually turned to light thumps against my ear.

The feel of Bella's warm body underneath mine and the humming lullaby of her heart had me at the brink of sleep. It wasn't till I felt Bella's hand run through my brown locks that I awoke from my trance like state. I lifted my head off her chest and turned to give her my full attention.

I was never one for experimenting sexually. I always had strong views on what I liked and did not like sexually, what I was willing to try and not willing to try. However, after seeing Bella's reaction to me giving her oral, my views changed quite a bit.

I was still not a fan of oral, it wasn't a pretty experience. I liked pussy just as much as the next guy but to sit there with your head between someone's legs, that's about as up close and personal as you can get. The taste of cum is not pleasant; the feel of wet, scratchy hair in your mouth it is not pleasant either.

Nonetheless, to hear those cries and whimpers of pleasure come from Bella's lips, to feel her demanding hands in my hair, urging me on and seeing her come undone in front of me, knowing I did that to her with just my mouth was very satisfying. I swear I came close to cumming again, myself, with just the feel of Bella's muscles clenching down on my tongue, squeezing it with need.

As for my first blowjob, it was good. I mean, Bella was not an expert, which showed but I got off just the same. It's not something I would want again though. I preferred Bella's mouth on my own and I think she would agree with me on that. At least, I would hope she preferred my lips on hers rather than on her pussy.

I watched Bella in silence as she brought my bandaged hand up to her view, holding it gently so not cause any pain. I could see the seriousness and sadness covering her face. Play time was officially over and it was back to reality.

"Please, tell me about this, about last night. What happened?" She asked.

I frowned. This was not something I wanted to talk about, especially with Bella. I didn't want her to feel she had to worry about me. It wasn't her problem, I wasn't her problem. Bella wanted to be my friend, she wanted to be there for me, I could see that, but I couldn't allow that. I would not make a good friend. I wouldn't even know where to start. I'm not great with opening up; it has been one big struggle for me just to get this far.

I had plenty of chances to open up and share with Bella and I blew them all and now it was too late. I couldn't be Bella's friend even if I wanted to. Jane had made it perfectly clear if I quit I couldn't see Bella anymore.

It might sound selfish but at the moment when Jane said those words, I didn't care. I didn't care if I couldn't see Bella anymore, because all I could think about at the moment was being free of these chains I put myself into two years ago. As much as I craved Bella's company, I craved freedom more. It seemed fair at the time. Now, I'm not so sure how I will be able to go on without knowing Bella.

I didn't want to frighten Bella with the details but I wanted her to know the basics, that I was on my way to improving, that I would be okay and I wanted to know she would be okay in return.

I met her eyes as I began to speak.

"I don't want to scare you but I've been through a lot of shit with my job leaving a lot of emotional scars and what not. There were women who touched me when I didn't want to be touched and where I didn't want to be touched. I've dealt with my fair share of rude, greedy women, who liked to treat men like sex toys instead of people, but it's expected, it comes with the job."

Bella cringed at my words; I could see the pity in her eyes. She lightly rubbed my hand that was in hers, trying to give me some comfort as well as silently encouraging me to go on. I looked down at the ground, unable to take Bella's hurt expression. I couldn't look at her if I was going to continue.

"Last night, I reached my limit. I couldn't take it anymore. I thought I was strong enough to take it, to keep that smile plastered to my face and play the act I do so well, but I couldn't. I felt it, I felt the pain, I felt the humiliation and I felt the emptiness that my life has become."

I looked back to find Bella was on the verge on tears. I took a deep breath, to keep my own tears at bay as well.

"It doesn't matter though because I quit." I stated, hoping to lift Bella's mood.

* * *

**BPOV**

Edward's story was so heartbreaking. It took all my strength not to bawl my eyes out in front of him. He had been through so much in his young life. I could only imagine what it must have been like for him to move from one cruel woman to the next, wanting something he was never able to achieve, acceptance, being respected as a person. He secretly wanted love but all he ever received was pain and rejection. No wonder he was so closed off, he was afraid to willingly open up on the off chance he got hurt.

I couldn't believe my ears when Edward announced he quit his job. It was the best thing I had heard in a long time. I had to stop myself from squealing out with joy. I wanted Edward to quit his job since the day I saw the effects it had on him. The day he screamed in my face calling himself a whore. It stilled hurt to think back to that memory. His pain and frustration was written all over his face. I knew then he was not proud of whom he was or what he was doing, he was not blind to the effects of his job. He just hid his emotions well.

I couldn't hold back at the wonderful news. I sprang up from my spot and gave Edward a hug. I was glad he was done with his awful job. Edward could finally be able to live a normal, warm life, filled with friendship and love and get all the respect he deserved.

"Edward that's great!" I exclaimed happily, giving his waist a light squeeze.

I felt his hands slowly pull my arms from his body. Edward moved back from me, leaving room between us. I was still fully nude and starting to feel cold. I looked over Edward's face over; he wasn't the happy, relieved guy I thought I would see. He still looked very much troubled. I started to worry again.

**Is there something he's not telling me?**

"What's wrong?" I asked concerned.

Edward's gaze dropped from mine, meeting the floor.

"I can't see you anymore Bella."

"What?" I gasped.

My whole world was tumbling down, my heart was breaking.

**How can he say that?**

**How can he believe such a thing? **

**Has our time together meant nothing to him?**

**Does he still consider me a client?**

Edward's eyes met my hurt ones as he began to explain.

"The rules state if an escort quits, they can no longer socialize with any clientele."

I scrunched my face up in confusion. I didn't understand what there was to worry about; the rules didn't apply to me anymore.

"Edward, I'm not your client anymore remember? I fired you. So, technically, that doesn't apply to me." I claimed.

"Well, you may not be my client anymore but you're still a client of the agency."

"What?"

"Bella they have your information keyed into a computer, if Jane wanted to she could find out where you lived." Edward stated.

**Who the hell is Jane?**

"Jane?"

"My boss, soon to be my ex-boss." Edward answered.

**One woman is going to stop me from seeing Edward?**

**What the hell makes her so powerful?**

"Edward this is silly. You actually think she would hurt me?"

I was expecting an argument towards my ridiculous question or a laugh at the crazy thought. Something to break the uncomfortable tension that now filled the air around us. I gulped nervously when I didn't get the response I was hoping for.

"I don't know, I never heard of her doing such things but I wouldn't want to risk you getting hurt either." He announced.

My eyes began to water. We have come so close, so close to getting back on track, close to making whatever we had work, and Edward was just going to give it up because he was scared of one woman's threats.

"So that's it, just like that, you're going to give up? Let her win?" I argued.

"Bella this isn't a game. This is your life we're talking about." Edward said raising his voice a little.

"Wait, my fathers a cop. I'm sure he can help." I voiced hopeful.

"Bella, your father won't want anything to do with me. I worked with Jane after all."

"That's not true." I protested.

"Bella, don't waste your time. I'm not wor…" Edward started to object but I quickly cut him off.

"Stop, okay, just stop. I don't want to hear you degrade yourself anymore. Edward you are someone, someone important and I… I love you."

"Bella, you can't. You've only known me what? A little over a month, it's impossible. You have no one to compare me too. You don't know what love is." He lectured.

"Don't belittle my feelings, I know what I feel. Okay, maybe I'm not one hundred percent sure it's love but that's alright, because whatever it is that I feel for you, it's enough for me. I don't have to know if it's truly love or not. I love almost everything about you, your personality, your body and the way you make me feel."

"Bella." Edward warned.

"Just because you're not ready to hear those words doesn't make them any less true."

"Bella, I don't love you. I can't, it's not in me to totally give myself to someone." He stressed.

"That's fine Edward, I'm not asking you to say it back or even feel the same. I just wanted you to know how I feel."

A pained look came across his face.

"Bella..."

"Make love to me."

Edward's eyes widen in shock.

"What?"

I didn't care about being safe anymore. I wanted to feel loved even if Edward wasn't willingly to give himself completely to me; maybe if I pretend the feeling was mutual it would be enough for me.

"You don't have to truly mean it. I just want to know what it feels like, just once."

"I never, Bella, I don't know how." Edward confessed, looking timid and out of place.

"Just pretend you love me, that you can't stand not to touch me, that you crave me. Touch me how you want, where you want. I don't care; I just want to feel you." I voiced weakly.

I waited on edge, my heart racing in fear of rejection. I was soon rewarded with Edward lips on mine.

I moaned in the kiss, loving the way his mouth felt against mine. I felt so much love in his kisses, his caresses, if only he could voice what his body already told me.

His lips went from my mouth to my neck, giving light nibbles and small kisses. His soft hands touched my breast making them aroused once again before traveling to his pants unzipping them and pushing them off his sculpted body for the second time of the day, his boxers followed suit.

I waited nervously as he positioned himself. He grabbed my left leg hooking it around his waist before leaning over my body. Edward sweetly, caressed my cheek before capturing my lips in another heated kiss. I gripped on to his back as he began to move in me. It was quiet between us; just the sound of our pants and moans escapes our lips. Sweat covered our bodies and we kept eye contact, only breaking it when the emotion was too much and we had to squeeze our eyes shut in pleasure. It was simple, gentle, and beautiful. It was everything I thought that making love should be. I came harder than I ever had before.

"Bella, oh god. I'm so sorry." Edward finally said.

I smiled up at him thinking I was finally going to hear the three words I had been waiting to hear. The three words that could make everything better.

"Bella, I forgot to use a condom." His eyes widened in panic.

The statement was enough to take my sex high away.

"What?"

"Come on, you have to douche right now?" Edward said grabbing my arm, pulling me off the sofa, taking me to the bathroom.

**This is not the romance I was hoping for.**

**Great, now I could be loveless and with a baby.**

**Could it get any worse?**

**I don't want to know.**

"Please tell me you're on the pill." Edward pleaded, clearly panicked as he searched through my bathroom cabinet to verify his question.

"Yes, I'm on the pill." I answered from the shower, feeling like utter crap.

It was pretty obvious the most important, meaningful thing I told Edward meant absolutely nothing to him and that hurt more than the idea of getting pregnant.

"Edward, maybe you should go." I voiced from behind the shower curtain.

I couldn't face him, I didn't want to.

"I'm sorry Bella, I told you not to get attached."

Now I was pissed. Edward was telling me who to love and not to love.

**Doesn't he know I had no choice in the matter?**

"Goodbye Edward."

"Bye Bella."

* * *

**Note:** I'm aiming for a thousand reviews. I know I still got a while to go till I reach that number but I'm hopeful. By the way, Weekitty has her first Edward/Bella story up. It's a cute story; you should check it out if you're a Bedward fan. ;)


	26. Lending a helping hand

**BPOV**

I feared this moment would come. In fact, I knew it would. I had hoped after I showered and was cleaned and refreshed I could come out and Edward would still be there and we could start over again.

I had hoped Edward didn't take my words of departure to heart. I had hoped he didn't listen to them at all.

I stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around my cold, wet body and went in search of the man I love. Looking around the living room and the bedroom, my hope quickly died, noticing I was very much alone.

I never wanted Edward to leave I was just upset at the way he acted.

The way he behaved sometimes pissed me off, not only the way he acted about our confusing relationship but the way he acted about himself. It was as if he felt he didn't deserve to be happy, as if he was imprisoned to this life of disrespect and being treated as worthless.

I wanted to yell and scream out in frustration. I wanted to go to all those awful, nasty women that ever hurt Edward and slap them as well as tell them off. I wanted to make them feel as shitty as they have made the man I love feel. Maybe if they had a dose of their own medicine they would think twice about treating people like worthless things. Maybe then, if Edward knew there was nothing to fear anymore he would finally be able to heal.

I knew it was impossible to find all those women and convince them that what they were doing was wrong. Even if I did stop them eventually there would be more willing to take their place.

I cringed at the thought.

**Maybe it's a losing battle.**

**No, I can't believe that.**

**I need to at least try for Edward. **

If I can take Jane down than I take down the whole agency. Then maybe women would learn their lesson.

I immediately picked up my phone and dialed.

"Hey dad, it's Bella. Listen, I don't know how to say this but here it goes. I was hanging around downtown with Alice when we came upon this suspicious building…"

"Hold up, Bella what were you doing down town? I told you that is not a good area for you to be in. You know all the crime that happens down there." My father lectured.

"I know dad, that's why I'm calling."

"Why, what happened, are you okay? Why were you down there anyways?"

I huffed annoyed at my dad's paranoia.

"Dad, if you would let me finish I could explain."

Now it was my dad's turn to sigh in frustration.

"As I was saying, Alice and I were downtown. I really didn't want to go, being how they have a bad reputation down there, like you said but Alice wanted to go to get some shoes she saw in that area."

"Shoes, you went down town for shoes?" My father questioned in disbelief.

"We're talking about Alice here dad." I stated.

My dad knew of Alice's love a fashion. Anyone who has ever met her knew, even people who didn't know her could tell with one glance at her name brand, trendy clothes.

"Uh huh, now get to the part about crime." My dad voiced, losing his patience.

"Anyway, we were looking for this store and got lost along the way. We started asking people for directions and noticed this building across from us. It was a nice looking building and for the most part everything seemed fine, except when I looked more closely. I saw these two mid-aged women standing by the curb. They were wearing skimpy clothes with holes in them and their faces were covered in cheap make up. Dad, I think they're running illegal prostitution at that building. I was wondering if you could check it out."

"Okay, do you have any proof?" My dad asked eagerly.

"Isn't my say so proof enough?" I questioned, biting my lower lip in stress.

"Now Bell, I can't send squad cars over there unless there is hard proof."

**Shit, I didn't think of that.**

**Come on Bella, think.**

"Well, the women that I saw, one of them dropped a big stack of cash. Now why would a woman dressed cheaply have a load of money in her possession and not be able to afford decent clothes…?"

I was putting it on thick but I was desperate.

"… And after that, both the women headed inside the building. Why would an upscale building let random streetwalkers in their place? Wouldn't they worry about their reputation?"

"Bella, I'm not going to argue that the women were probably streetwalkers. However that still doesn't mean the building is running a prostitution agency. Maybe it was their hotel or something. And you know how many prostitutes there are down town? I can't just send a car for a couple prostitutes. There will just be more in their place. Plus, downtown is not really in my jurisdiction."

"But..."

"It was a good try Bella but I can't risk sending my men over there unless we have hard evidence."

**Say something!**

**Anything!**

"Well, there's more!" I blurted out, knowing my father was seconds from ending the conversation.

I was grasping on everything and anything I could think of.

"What's that?" My dad asked, already losing interest.

"Well, I was curious, so I wrote down the address of that place and looked it up in the yellow pages and you know what I found out?"

"I can't wait to hear this." My father voiced sarcastically.

"I found the number and called the place myself and it's an escort service."

"Really?" My dad asked doubtful.

"Yes, the place is called Quench Your Thirst. Now can you send the cars over?" I asked anxiously.

"You're sure it's sex escorting Bella?"

"Yes, I ask the lady over the phone what they provided, dad it's prostitution."

"Okay, I'll see what I can do. Thanks kiddo. Maybe you should become a detective or something. I could always use more people in this field." My dad suggested.

I forced laugh trying to avoid an awkward moment.

"Yeah, ah, I think I'll stick with my books and leave the crime work to you."

"Okay, well if you ever change your mind you know who to go to." He replied.

"Yeah, can you please call me and let me know what you find out?" I asked trying not to sound too eager.

"Sure thing."

"Thanks, bye Dad."

"Take care kiddo."

* * *

**EPOV**

"Edward what are you doing here? Our next meeting isn't for a couple of days." Dr. Roberts voiced, standing behind her desk.

Confusion was written all over her face as well as concern.

I panicked seeing that she was in the processes of collecting her things, ready to call it a day.

**Oh please don't throw me out.**

**Please let me talk.**

**I need to get this off my chest.**

"I know I shouldn't be here. I know I should have called but I had nowhere else to go and I need to talk to someone."

Dr. Roberts sighed setting her bag on top of her desk.

"Edward, this is not how it works. You need to make an appointment before coming here. It's the end of the day. I'm sorry for your recent problems, but they are going to have to wait a couple of days. I'm tired, it's been a long day and right now I just want to be with my family." She voiced.

**Please don't give up on me.**

**I know I'm a mess.**

**Maybe if you give me some time I'll change.**

"I'm sorry; I know you have a life. I just… I don't know who else to talk to." I stressed, feeling very much alone.

**Please say it's okay.**

**Please let me talk.**

"Goodnight Dr. Roberts, see you in the morning!" One of the receptionists called out before turning the lights off in the front.

"Night!" Dr. Roberts called out in return.

After a moment passed she turned her attention back to me arching an eyebrow.

"How did you get in here anyways? It's past office hours, the staff knows that." She questioned.

"I think your youngest receptionist has a crush on me." I answered.

"Ashley, I should have known." She voiced, shaking her head in displeasure.

Okay Edward, I'll tell you what, I'll give you fifteen minutes, but that's it. I would like to get home some time tonight."

**I can breathe again.**

"Thanks." I breathed out in relief, lying out on the couch.

**Who knew telling personal feelings to a stranger could be so addicting?**

**Who knew it could bring so much relief?**

took notice to my change in seating arrangements but didn't say anything. She took her spot in her big chair and began with her usually starter question.

"So, tell me Edward. What brings you here this evening?"

"Well, a lot. Since I only have fifteen minute I guess I'm going to have to summarize everything. Okay here it goes… I had to see a client yesterday, Victoria. She made a guy fuck me. It was an awful experience. It really screwed me up and Bella was there for me. I quit my job after that and successfully had oral with Bella followed by sex, she told me she loved me and now she could possibly be pregnant." I rambled off.

**It feels good to get that weight off my chest.**

"Whoa, one thing at a time. Bella's pregnant with your baby?"

**Oh, she caught that.**

**Of course out of everything I just voiced, getting fucked by a guy and quitting my job, she only hears Bella's pregnant.**

"I don't know. She's on the pill. So chances are low but there is a chance." I confessed.

**Shit, those pills better work.**

"How is that even possible? I thought you wore protection?" Dr. Roberts asked confused.

**Yeah, so did I.**

**Stupid emotions.**

I covered my face with my hands feeling ashamed and stressed.

"I do, I forgot just this once in the heat of the moment I guess or I forgot out of sheer panic, one or the other." I mumbled against my hands.

"What do you mean panic? What would make having sex with a woman be scary for someone like you, who gets paid to do that all that time?" She challenged.

"Shasmetomalovther." I muffled.

"What?" I'm sorry you're going to have to speak up Edward I can't understand a thing you said."

**Why do you have to make this harder on me?**

**Can't you see I'm struggling already?**

I sighed before removing my hands from my face.

"I said, she asked me to make love to her."

"What's the problem with that Edward?"

"I never… I never made love before. I don't even know what it is, how the hell can I express something I never felt before? It was awful… well not awful but I didn't know what I was doing, and that's never happened to me before. I always have a basic routine I do. I always know what the women I sleep with want. Bella is so sweet and I just want to help her out. I don't know, I might have even been curious as to what making love might feel like myself. So I gambled, I went off routine and just did what felt nice."

Dr. Roberts face was blank.

"Well that's progress. You finally quit your job and you want to experience love. I'm actually not surprised you have never made love before; being in the industry you were in. Dealing with unfair treatment form both sexes, I imagine it's the farthest thing from your mind.

I scrunched my face in confusion.

"Why don't you sound surprised?"

She gave me a small smile.

"Edward did you forget I met with Bella today?"

**Shit, that was today?**

**I completely forgot.**

"Yeah, but I mean… she told you she loved me?"

She nodded her head yes.

**Fuck, now what am I going to do?**

**Even my therapist knows Bella's feelings for me and I'm still freaken confused about this whole mess.**

"We talked about a lot of things, but that's beside the point. We're not here to discuss Bella's thoughts, were here to deal with yours. So how did it make you feel to hear Bella say she loved you?"

"It's not right." I protested, shaking my head in disapproval.

**It's not right for her to feel that way for me.**

**It's not right for me to feel I'm her equal, when I'm not even close.**

**It's not right that her life may be fucked up now because I forgot to put on protection.**

"Edward, there is no right or wrong with love. You can't pick and choose. You just feel it." She preached.

"I don't know. The whole baby situation was a complete wake up call. That something as stupid as forgetting to put on a condom could fuck everything up. I don't want Bella to be pregnant. I don't want her to be bound to me."

**I don't want a baby right?**

**I don't want her to regret ever meeting me.**

**I don't want it to be my fault that she has a baby out of wedlock.**

**I don't want it to be because of me that she becomes a single parent.**

**I don't want her to hate me.**

**She can do so much better.**

**She deserves better, a better life and a better love interest.**

"So you don't want Bella to be stuck with you. Is that what you're saying Edward?"

"She deserves better." I argued.

**I don't have a job to support a family.**

**I don't have the emotional stability to have a family or even show love.**

**I mean what is love exactly?**

**It's foreign to me.**

Edward, look around you. No one is here but you and me. There is no one judging you. Once in for all, deep down, what do feel for her? You know how you feel you just have to say it."

**What do I feel?**

**I feel like a big disappointment.**

**I'm a disappointment to my parents or would be if they truly knew what I was doing for a living while they thought I was in the music industry.**

**I'm a disappointment to Bella.**

**I could never show her as much affection as she has giving to me and it's not right or fair.**

**I'm a disappointment to myself.**

**I never wanted to grow up to become this disposable, robotic sex toy.**

**What I feel for Bella is irrelevant because it's not going to change anything. **

**At the end of the day I will still be this and she will be alone.**

**I can't make her happy.**

**I'll only bring her misery…**

* * *

**BPOV**

I headed inside the grocery store, grabbing a cart. I scanned high and low on the shelves trying to figure out what I needed. I placed a couple of items I was running low on, like, milk and bread in it before heading down the candy aisle. I was in desperate need of a sweet fix, something to get me out of my funk.

I smiled as I came upon one of my favorite candy bars, Twix, throwing it in my cart before processing over to the feminine care section.

I browsed down at the pregnancy test kits. I began to bite my lower lip nervously.

**I'm on the pill I have nothing to worry about right?**

**But the pills aren't one hundred percent pregnancy proof. **

**Shit, what if I am pregnant?**

**Calm down Bella, don't hyperventilate in the store.**

**We don't know anything yet.**

**Just grab a test and go.**

**Shit, there are so many, which one should I choose?**

**Oh crap.**

**I wonder if Alice ever had a pregnancy scare.**

I reached down with a shaky hand grabbing the closest container to me. I turned the box over reading the inscription.

"First response pregnancy test, if you see two pink lines you may be pregnant. One pink line indicates you're not pregnant." I whispered to myself.

I felt a nudge on my shoulder. I turn to see a smiley faced women. I quickly hid the test in my hands but sometime told me she already saw.

"That's a good one, First Response. You can't go wrong with that one." She praised.

"Oh, thanks." I answered uneasily, glancing back and forth between the lady's very pregnant belly and the kit in my hands.

"Yeah, no problem and good luck." She voiced as she rolled her chart down the aisle.

**Good luck?**

**Good luck at what?**

**Good luck, hope you're pregnant or good luck, I hope you have better luck than I did?**

**Why do people assume if you think you're pregnant, you always want the baby?**

**What is so great about a baby anyway?**

**They whine, they cry, they want, they need, and they cost loads of money and demand your time.**

**Pets, pets are the way to go.**

**But then again, they shed, they whine, they cry, they want, they need, and they cost loads of money and demand your time.**

**Argh!**

**Scratch that, being alone is the way to go.**

**If your alone you don't have to worry about anyone but yourself and you don't have to worry about getting pregnant.**

**It is lonely though.**

**So lonely.**

I shook the thoughts from my head and tossed the test kit in my cart heading over to the cashier to pay. I must have still been lost in my thoughts because the next thing I knew I rammed my cart into the person ahead of me.

"OW!" The guy moaned, grabbing a hold of his now bruised elbow.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, my mind is elsewhere today." I apologize to the man's back.

I hoped he wasn't to upset. He was quite built and tall from what I could see.

I watched on edge as the man started to turn around as if to say something. I looked up surprised to see none other than Jacob Black.

"Bella?" He voiced, stunned to see me.

"Jacob, what are you doing here?" I asked just as stun.

He smirked amused.

"It's a store Bella."

I blushed in embarrassment.

"Oh right, I mean, I didn't expect to see you here. I mean, how are you?" I asked nervously.

I wasn't sure why I was so nervous. I mean, I only had one date with the guy and he obviously wasn't taken with me or else he would have called.

He snickered obviously finding my discomfort amusing.

"I'm good, I ah, I actually feel like an ass. I wanted to call you but me being me, I lost your number. I would have looked it up in the white pages but I didn't want to come off like a stalker."

Now it was my turn to snicker at his discomfort.

"Oh, well I guess it was a good thing I ran into you then. See, I thought you didn't like how our date went." I confessed, feeling a little better about myself after learning otherwise.

"Of course not, you're a sweet girl Bella. Any guy would be lucky to have you. I mean, enjoy your company." Jacob praised, his face flushed with color.

"I'll take the next person in line please!" The cashier called out.

"Ladies first." Jacob voiced, clearing a way for me to pass.

I smiled about to move my cart when I remember the pregnancy test.

**Shit!**

"Umm, you know what, why you don't go first. I think I have a lot more items than you. It's only fair." I replied.

"Sure, okay, thanks."

Jacob gave me a big cheesy grin before moving to the cashier.

After he finished paying for his beer, chips and nacho sauce he gave me an apologetic look saying he wish he could stay and talk but he was having a guy's night at his place and his crew were quite the impatient bunch. I for one was grateful, not that I didn't enjoy spending time with Jacob. I just didn't want him to see the pregnancy test and freak out or think less of me. I told Jacob he was more than welcomed to look me up in the white pages.

I waited till the moving doors shut behind him before setting my things on the counter. Everything was going find until the cashier reached the pregnancy kit. She paused noticing the kit was the next item to be scanned. She looked up at me and then back down at the test. I think it was pretty clear on my face what I wanted the result to be. Once my Twix was scanned I grabbed it, tearing the wrapper off of it.

"You mind? I've been craving this." I asked without waiting for an answer, bringing the crunchy, chewy chocolate goodness to my lips.

I probably looked like a crazy nut case but I didn't care. I was too worried to care.

"Mmm, nothing beats a Twix." I said through chews.


	27. The shit hit the fan

**BPOV**

It's Thursday, the day after Edward and I had sex without a condom, one day closer to finding out if I am pregnant or not.

I couldn't sleep last night at all. I spent half the night staring at the test kit on my night stand, the other half I spent tossing and turning, looking up at the ceiling, sighing in frustration, tugging at my hair in stress, and frequently eyeing Edward's vacant side of the bed, as if he would somehow appear out of thin air and comfort me. I was miserable.

Now, I am at work and I can't concentrate on anything except the what if's in my head.

**What if am pregnant?**

**What if Edward doesn't want the baby?**

**What if I have to raise the baby alone?**

**What if I can't handle it?'**

**What if I'm a terrible mother?**

I glance down at the Curious George book in my hands. The day has barely begun and already my thoughts are elsewhere. To make matters worse, we have a bunch of kindergarten kids here to get an informative talk about checking out library books and the importance of reading and keeping their imaginations alive as they grow older.

Marge is giving her little speech right now while I'm standing in the background with a stack of children's books to pass out to the kids.

Half the children are sleeping or spacing out and the other half are being rambunctious, yelling and crying for no reason at all.

Once Marge finishes her speech and all the books are passed out I head over to the children's section to return the extra books that are left.

I come across the What to Expect when you're Expecting book. It must have got toss in the pile by accident. I'm nervous. I can tell because my hands begin to shake as I take it out from the cart.

Skimming through the book I realize there is more to being a mother than I thought. Reading about all the responsibility it takes, all the mental strength it takes, the needs of the child and the cost. The more I read the more it is starting to sound like a death sentence than a delight.

I am mentally exhausted and I can feel a headache coming on.

With the last book put in its proper place I grabbed my cart and begin to steer it back toward the front of the library.

I barely make it two steps when my phone starts to ring. I quickly dip my hand into my pocket and fish my cell out. Glancing at the name, I can't help but sigh in disappointment before bringing it up to my ear.

"Hey Alice." I answer, trying not to let my distress be heard.

"Hey girly, I haven't heard from you in a while and I was wondering if we could get together today?" She asks in her usually cheerful voice.

"Umm, well I'm at work right now Alice and I work all day." I stress, trying not to think of what a long day I have ahead of me.

"Well, how about lunch, you still get one of those don't you?" Alice jokes.

"Yeah, umm, okay is one o'clock good?"

"Prefect, see you at one girly. I'll let you get back to work." Alice replies before ending the call.

I shut my phone off after that, thinking it is better that way. Instead of getting my hopes up every time it rings thinking it is Edward calling me.

* * *

**EPOV**

I entered the front doors to the place I once called work, looking around my surroundings. Everything and everyone looked the same. I guess I had this crazy notion that the place couldn't survive without me, like I was valued there, an asset to Jane. Though I have only worked for her for two years, I once thought of us like business partners considering she often paid me compliments and commended my willingness to succeed in her world of sex.

She showed me her true colors when she sold me out, bidding me off to that horror of a woman Victoria to do as she pleased. I'm grateful I found out who Jane really was before it was too late.

My eyes are now open and I know what I have to do.

"Edward, I thought you quit?" Kami, my ex-secretary questioned.

"Jane wanted me to think about it. I'm just here to let her know I made up my mind. I'm one hundred percent done with this bullshit, including hers." I announced.

"Glad to hear that."

"Have you seen Jane?" I asked scanning the floor.

"I think she's…"

"Police!" A loud voice exclaimed.

It took only seconds for several cops to surround the area. Luckily I was out of their view.

I quickly hid under kami's desk, panicked.

**Fuck, cops!**

**The last thing I need is to get thrown in jail.**

I watched on edge from my hiding place as Jane walked confidently over with a smile on her face.

"Can I help you gentlemen?" She asked nicely.

"Jane Watson?" The chief of the police asked.

"Yes?"

"Please come with me." He voiced in a calm yet stern matter.

"What for? I did nothing wrong." She claimed, folding her arms to her chest.

The police officer eyed the room full of curious and confused looking employees before he started to speak.

**Yes, Jane's staff consists of great actors and actresses.**

**I should know. I used to be one.**

"There is talk of this place being a prostitution run business." He stated.

Jane looked to the left and right of her at her colleagues giving hard looks wondering who ratted her out.

"I think there been a misunderstanding, as you can see this is a regular business office. There are no whores around you, just a couple of suits." She insisted.

"That may be, but your still going down town for questioning." He declared.

"Oh really… Chief Charlie Swan?" She voiced, eyeing his badge.

**Swan?**

**Bella's father?**

**Are you fucking kidding me?**

Jane arched an eyebrow as she went on.

"You wouldn't happen to be related to Bella Swan would you?"

My head popped up from under cover looking him over curiously. His stunned, wide eyed state confirmed my worst nightmare.

**Shit, what did I get myself into?**

Jane smirked seeing he's weakness and ran with it.

"Really Mr. Swan, you want to bring me in and confess to prostitution when your daughter is a client of mine?" She challenged.

**Fuck, this is not good. **

There was a gasp among Charlie's men. He looked embarrassed and pissed off at the same time.

**Fuck!**

"I don't know what you're talking about but it's clear you will do anything to avoid going down town to chat. Afraid Ms. Watson?" He retorted, trying to gain the upper hand.

"No, but you should be." She quipped.

"Threatening a police officer is not very smart lady." Charlie lectured taking a couple step closer to her.

"Neither is threatening me, Mr. Swan." She shot back.

"If you bring me to the station you might as well bring your little daughter along as well, because she will be going to jail along with me, and as for your job, how do you think it will look having a cop bust a supposed prostitution agency with his very own daughter being a client?"

"You're lying. My daughter would never sink so low."

"Really? Unlike you, I actually have proof." Jane said amused.

Charlie gulped, uncertainty spread across his face.

Would you like to see?" She asked wickedly, pointing toward her computer.

"Stand down men." Charlie ordered.

"That's what I thought. Unless you're interested in making an appointment, I suggest you leave." Jane preached.

Shockingly Chief Swan did as told heading out with his group of men.

As soon as the front doors closed and the last of Charlie's men were out the door Jane's fury erupted.

"Who the fuck talked? She shouted, eyeing everyone in the room.

I cringed at her anger, her eyes held daggers. The room was silent.

"You better hope I don't find out, or you will be sorry. Now back to work!" she ordered before slamming her door shut.

* * *

**BPOV**

"So what's going on with you?" Alice asked before taking a sip of her tea.

"Well, I told Edward I loved him and we had sex without a condom. So now I could possibly be pregnant, oh and I ran into Jacob last night, but enough about me what's new with you?" I asked a wide eyed Alice.

"Bella seriously, no protection? You should know better than that." Alice lectured me.

"I'm on birth control pills, Edward just forgot to used additional protection, that's all. It's probably nothing. I mean, I'm sure all women have had pregnancy scare at least once in their life, right?"

"Sure, I guess. I mean my period was once three days late and I thought what if. Of course Jazz and I always make sure we have protection though, better safe than sorry."

"Gee, thanks, I feel so much better."

"I'm sorry Bella. I didn't mean anything by that." Alice apologized.

"I know, I'm just stressed. What if I am?"

"Stop thinking about it, you'll just make it worse. I'll be there and hold your hand if you want when you take the test."

"Thanks Alice that means a lot."

"Of course, what are friends for?"

* * *

**EPOV**

I gained what strength I could before heading to Jane's office. I opened the door ignoring the do not disturb sign. She looked up at me and forced a smile.

"Edward, love, have you made up your mind?"

"Yes."

"Good, all is forgiven. I hate to admit it, but it hasn't been the same without you these last few days. Your clients have been calling off the hook and Victoria even wants another go at you." She stated, beaming at that thought.

**NO FUCKING WAY is that happening again!**

**She must be out of her fucking mind if she thinks I would EVER see Victoria again.**

**After everything I she DID, after everything I TOLD Jane.**

**This bitch is heartless.**

I shuddered, balling my hands in a fist, trying to control my bottled up anger.

"Yes Jane, I made my mind up and I still want to quit."

Jane's smile dropped and her eyes narrowed.

"You what?"

**QUIT!**

"I want to quit. I quit. I quit prostituting, I quit this agency and I quit you."

"Oh really, I'm offering you a chance of a lifetime here Edward, and you shit on me? What kind of gratitude is that? And now I have to deal with this freaken cop situation on my hands." She bickered.

**This coming from the bitch that kicked me while I was down.**

**Karma's a bitch, bitch.**

"I'm sorry you have stress like everyone else in the world Jane but it's not my problem, not anymore." I snapped.

"Bella swan..."

**What the fuck?**

**How did she enter this conversation?**

"What?"

"Bella Swan was your client wasn't she?" Jane asked arching an eyebrow as if she realized something.

**Fucking conniving bitch!**

"So, what's your point, she is not my client anymore. She stopped wanting my services weeks ago Jane. I highly doubt she is your snitch."

"Oh really, and you think it's a coincidence her father was the cop who came through the front doors?" She challenged.

**Fuck, Bella.**

"Yes I do." I forced out.

"Hmm, maybe your right. I mean, if she wasn't satisfied with your performance, why would she even bother wasting her time?"

**Go fuck yourself!**

"That's not why she stopped!" I blurted out without thinking.

A cruel smile spread to her face.

"Oh really, why then, enlighten me Edward?"

**Shit!**

**Why couldn't Bella just stay away like I asked?**

"It doesn't matter. It's over with and I no longer work here. Goodbye Jane." I voiced before proceeding toward the door.

"Are you still seeing her Edward?" Jane called out, causing me to halt my steps.

**Not anymore.**

"No." I answered with my back to hers.

"Good, keep it that way. I would hate to see something happen to that pretty face of yours." She threatened.

**Fuck, I've got to warn Bella.**

"Thanks for making this so much easier Jane." I replied, before slamming the door behind me.

* * *

**Note: **Happy early Easter all! Reviews would be a great Easter present. ;)


	28. Love conquers all

**BPOV**

I came through the front door with a heavy sigh. The day was tiring and I couldn't even remember most of it. My brain was so scrammed and stuck on this whole baby situation. Dealing with a group of kindergarteners was exhausting, the messes, the annoying, weird questions they asked and their energy, oh god, their energy. They never tired. I barely had the strength to handle it.

**How the heck can I handle a baby, if I can barely handle one day with a group of kids?**

I grabbed the armrest of the couch to support myself as I took my pumps off. Once I was barefoot and jacketless I proceeded towards my bedroom, when suddenly the front door was thrown open with a loud bang. I jumped scared and turned only to be met with Edward. A very worried yet pissed off Edward.

**Edward!**

**He came back!**

**Why does he look so upset?**

"Bella what did you do, what did you do?" He questioned frantically, heading over towards me.

**Shit, now what?**

I wasn't sure if he was worried for me or pissed off at me. I didn't want to find out either. I watched in fear as he grew closer.

"What?"

"Jane, she knows. She knows you ratted her out." Edward stated, stopping a couple of feet short of me.

I could hear the alarm in his voice. He was worried about Jane's retaliation. What I couldn't understand was why. I told my father about her company, she should be behind bars now. Why would Edward be worried if she was locked up?

"What?"

"Bella how could you be so stupid?" Edward voiced showing his anger on the subject.

He pulled at the ends of his locks, the strands stood up on their own due to his actions making his hair look like a wild mess. It suddenly occurred to me that Edward's usual hair style had more to do with stress than a trend.

"Me, you're the one who worked for the bitch." I snapped, feeling my own annoyance coming through.

Edward started to pace the room back and forth nervously. His anxiety scared me. He had been through so much with his job and very little ever scared Edward. I knew it had to be bad to see him so unglued.

What happened?"

He stopped to answer my question. The anger returned to his features. Edward was a beautiful man but anger did not suit him well. I didn't want to see him this way. I wanted to see the happy; carefree Edward I only got glimpses of every once in a while. I wanted comforting, confident Edward to tell me everything would be okay and that he was there for me.

"Your father was there."

**I knew I could count on him.**

"Good, did he arrest her?"

"No."

Now I was starting to panic. How could my father not arrest Jane? I was sure he would find more than enough evidence when he went there. Was she really that manipulative?

"No, why not?"

"Because, he didn't have anything to go on and Jane told him you were a client." Edward said through clenched teeth.

I gasped in horror.

**Shit.**

Edward came closer grabbing the sides of my arms trying to get my attention back.

"Bella, you have to go into hiding, at least until this thing blows over."

"My dad knows?" I asked, looking off in the distance, thinking how much trouble I was going to be in later.

**Shit, he's going to kill me.**

**What am I going to do?**

"Bella are you even listening to me!" Edward shouted, shaking my arms, irritated.

I turned my head back to look at him. His face was now inches from mine. I could feel his hot breath on my cheeks and near my mouth as he panted, trying to control his anger.

I myself was angry, scared and frustrated. There I was, trying to do a good deed for the man I loved and he was going off on me. He was angry with me when he should have been angry at Jane. There I was alone giving my whole heart and trust to a man who couldn't even do the same. There I was standing possibly with his baby inside of me and he couldn't even say a simple "I'm worried for you." or "How are you feeling about all of this?"

I broke out of his hold and pushed against his chest. He didn't fall, he didn't even stumble. His body gave a light jerk from my force but that was it. His eyes widened in shock and his mouth was ajar.

"Why do you even care?" I snapped.

"Bella." He gasped, his face wrinkled as if in pain.

"You don't love me, remember? I voiced harshly.

He let out a sigh in stress and ran his hands through his messy hair trying to fix the wild strands he created as well as soothe himself in the process.

"Bella this is not the time for this, pack a suit case, only the essentials and go to your dad's for a while." He demanded in a stern voice.

"Do you hear yourself? You sound like she works for the mob."

"Bella please, just do what I ask, it's only until…" Edward struggled with his words.

"…until what? Wake up; it's never going to change. She is never going to change. If you keep running Edward, she wins. All those bitches that ever hurt you win. No, I'm staying and I'm standing my ground. I'm not scared of her, let her find me. I'll be waiting." I claimed stubbornly, folding my arms to my chest.

"Bella, do you hear yourself? She will hurt you." Edward stressed.

"She can't hurt me. The only one who could hurt me is you and you already did that." I confessed sadly, trying to stay strong.

I watched as Edward winced in pain closing his eyes. He took a moment to calm himself before opening them and meeting my hurt gaze.

"I'm sorry Bella. I'm sorry, I'm not the man you thought I was, I'm sorry, I'm such a mess and I'm sorry I can't give you what you want."

"What I want is you Edward, that's all."

"Bella, you deserve better than me. When will you realize that?"

"When you realize you are worthy of happiness and being loved." I retorted.

"Bell…"

Edward was cut off with a light knock from the front door. We both turned to find the door was left partly open from Edward's enraged entrance, giving us a good view of who was knocking. Standing in the doorway was a brown haired woman who looked to be in her mid-thirties wearing a pantsuit.

"Kami?" Edward questioned, coming closer to the woman.

**Kami?**

**Edward's secretary?**

**What is she doing here?**

I stayed put as the woman opened the door fully letting herself in.

"I went to your house and when you didn't answer, I thought you might be here." She explained.

**Wait, she's been to his house?**

**I haven't even seen his house.**

**Wait, why would she go to his house?**

**What the hell is going on?**

**Are they together or something?**

I watched annoyed as Edward greeted her, seeing his attitude totally change.

**Does he like her more than me?**

**Is this why he left last night?**

**Is she the reason why he is mad at me?**

**Because Kami could have lost her job?**

**Who is this woman?**

"I just wanted to tell you, you don't have to worry about Jane anymore. She's been arrested. "She stated.

I let out a sigh in relief.

**Thank god something good has come of this.**

"What, how? She can't… Bella…" Edward struggled to voice.

I scrunched my face up in confusion having a hard time understanding what Edward was trying to say. Luckily, Kami seem to understand. I tensed up as she brought a hand up to his shoulder giving him a light squeeze in comfort. I knew the move was completely innocent but it made me boil with jealousy.

**Get your hands off my man!**

I bit my lip to keep my words at bay, knowing she was only trying to help.

"Don't worry. I've been working undercover over there for a while."

My eyes widen in shock at her words. I'm sure Edward was just as surprised if not more, considering he worked with the lady and never knew.

**Wow, what are the chances?**

I let out a breath I was holding as Kami's hand left Edward's body.

"Undercover?" Edward repeated, stunned.

"Yes, I'm a cop Edward. I've been working the case a little over a year. Bella's father almost blew the whole thing. I thought I was done for when he came bursting through the front doors. Jane was always careful about getting rid of important documents. She was pretty good at it too. However, when Charlie came a lot of coworkers got nervous and sloppy and I was able to get my hands on the files I needed gaining enough proof to lock Jane up."

Kami looked back and forth between Edward and me before giving a small smile in return.

"Edward don't worry, Jane is going away for a long time. All the workers will be fined and given a warning. If they continue to prostitute the next time they will get a jail sentence. You're lucky, you quit just at the nick of time. I know you mean well, so I won't fine you. However, I need you to come down town with me and name her. I asked others but they chickened out."

I watched as Edward's posture stiffened and he began to play with his hands nervously. I walked over to where he was and stood next to him.

"You won't be charged, she doesn't even have to see you. You just have to point her out and make a statement, that's it. Kami claimed.

I broke Edward's fidgeting hands up taking his left hand in mine, letting him know I was there for him. He looked down at our connected hands giving them a light squeeze. I wasn't sure if it was to comfort me or him. His eyes met Kami's again, looking more confident than before.

"Okay let do it."

* * *

I sat at Kami's desk, waiting for Edward's return. He said it would be best if I waited for him instead of going into the room where he had to point Jane out. It was as if he didn't want me to see the woman, as if she was a monster he was trying to protect me from. Maybe he was worried if she got a glimpse of me and saw Edward she would put two and two together and seek revenge when she would finally get released from jail, like his other coworkers feared. She didn't have my address though. All the evidence was now in police custody.

**Oh god!**

**What if I get thrown in jail?**

**What if this goes on my record?**

I continued with my nerve racking thoughts, and chewed on my nails to keep myself busy. Ten minutes came and went with no Edward.

**Where is he?**

**I hope everything is okay?**

**Oh god, what if Jane knows it's Edward pointing her out?**

My nervous energy was bursting to come out. I started tapping my shoes against the floor, meanwhile still biting at my nails. People probably thought I was on drugs or something. I'm sure it was not the best way to act at a police station but I couldn't help it. I was nervous as hell.

"Bella."

"Ah!" I exclaimed, jumping out of my seat.

Kami bit her lip, trying to hold back her giggles.

"You have to calm down or people are going to think you are mental." She said half serious, look at the room full of curious eyes.

I blushed slightly embarrassed.

"Sorry, I can't help it. I should have gone in there with him. He won't admit it but he needs me, I know he does." I stressed.

Kami gave me comforting smile, handing me a cup of water.

"Here, I figured you might be parched."

"Thanks." I replied, before taking a small sip.

"How much longer?" I asked, eyeing the door I saw Edward enter about fifteen minutes ago.

"It shouldn't be long now. You sure you don't want to wait in the car or go get something to eat while you wait? I don't think Edward would mind." Kami said thoughtfully.

I shook my head stubbornly even thought my stomach was rumbling in protest.

"No, I'm fine. I want to be here when he comes out. I want him to know I'm here for him." I stated.

Kami lightly touched my shoulder like she had with Edward's earlier.

"I think that's pretty obvious. I'll go see what's the hold up." She announced before heading in the very door Edward had gone through not so long ago.

I let out a sigh, taking my spot back in the chair.

I heard the door behind me squeak open. I quickly spun around hoping to find Edward. Instead my breath caught in my chest. There walking out in handcuffs was a woman with the coldest blue eyes I had ever seen. Her blonde hair was up in a bun and she was wearing dress clothes. She didn't look like a criminal she looked professional. Yet, she had an evil, cruel look to her. I shivered as her eyes met mine briefly before she turned her attention to the front of her heading on her way with a guard on other side of her.

I worked on regaining my breath when my father came in view.

"Dad?" I questioned, surprised to see him, considering he didn't work at that station.

He turned to see me and from stunned to pissed in a matter of seconds. I was starting to feel nauseous. I had barely eaten all day do to my nerves and it was starting to get to me, that and my father's hard looks as he approached. I was beginning to think I should have taken Kami's advice and got food.

"I thought I taught you better than this, don't you have any respect for yourself, for me?" He lectured.

I never saw him so upset before. I didn't think he would get so angry. I knew it wasn't something a father yearned to hear; that his daughter had to pay for attention but it was my life after all, not his.

"Jesus Christ Bella, if the force hears about this…how do you think this makes me look?"

**Great, now I feel like shit.**

**Of course his reputation could be hurt, why hasn't this occurred to me before?**

**Maybe because I was only worried how this whole thing affected me at the time.**

"I'm sorry dad, I didn't think…"

"No, you didn't. I called your mother after hearing the news; I thought she should be aware of her daughter's bad choices. You know what she told me?"

I shook my head back and forth, not really sure I wanted to know.

"She says you are seeing someone in the sex industry. You own mother, my ex-wife, tells me this as if it is nothing." He shudders at the thought.

"Dad… I…"

"Bella where is your head at? You could have gotten a std, gotten raped and beaten or burglarized!" He said, raising his voice, causing people to stare again.

"Edward isn't like that. You don't know him!"

He looked me over before speaking again.

"I don't want you to see him again. It's bad enough you did what you did but to keep seeing him as if it's a real relationship is just sick." He voiced trying to keep his tone low, noticing the stares.

"Like your so prefect dad?" I said bitterly, feeling my eyes fill up with water.

"Bella…"

"No, you have no right giving me relationship advice. When was the last time you had one?" I snapped.

Charlie's anger subsided and hurt took over. He gave me one last disappointed look before walking off in the opposite direction.

I let out a shaky breath, keeping the tears at bay.

"Bella."

I turned around to see Edward. I could tell by the concerned look on his face he heard everything. I didn't want to fight anymore. I didn't even want to talk. I was so drained of energy. I moved forward and wrapped my arms around Edward's neck, resting my head on his chest, needing comfort. It wasn't long till I felt his arms wrap around my back, holding me close.

"Bella, I don't want ruin your relationship with your dad." He said next to my ear, while holding me.

"Edward, that had nothing to do with you. He needs to know he's not always right and that this is my life, not his."

I heard a heavy sigh come from Edward and he started to pull away. I cling to his body, afraid he was pushing me away again. He gave me ease by rubbing my back and I reluctantly let him leave my embrace giving him room to say what he wanted to say. Edward gave me an uneasy look, having a hard time looking in my eyes almost as if he was ashamed.

**Please don't leave me again.**

**Please don't tell me you made a mistake by being with me.**

"I'm sorry for the way I've treated you lately. I just, when you said…and then I forgot to use protection and I started to have a flash of what your future could possibly end up like, if you were pregnant and I didn't want that life for you. I still don't. I don't want you to be disappointed, you deserve the best and I didn't believe that was me. I still have my doubts about me, but not us. All the strength you have shown me and hope, wanting to stand up to Jane and finding the guts to stand up to your dad. It really means a lot and it made me realize something. I've known for some time what I felt for you. I just didn't want to admit it because I worried you would later regret being with me. I'm not worried anymore. You made me brave. I know you're scared about this whole baby issue. Trust me, I'm scared to. I mean, what do I know about babies, nothing. I don't want you to worry though; if you are pregnant, I will be there for you and the baby. I want to be there and I know we can figure out this parenting thing together, that is, if we have to."

"Really?" I voiced, through teary eyes, though this time they were happy tears.

Edward gave a small smile, wiping a tear the run down my cheek.

"I'm sorry I had such little faith in us. I won't do that again. I love you Bella."

I let out a small sob that was threatening to come out for some time before responding.

"I love you too." I said through a cracked voice.

Tears were falling freely down my face but I didn't care, neither did Edward as he leaned down capturing my lips in a love felt kiss.

* * *

**Note:** Yay, over 1,000 reviews! Woohoo! ;)


	29. NEWS UPDATE

**Okay, everyone listen up.**

Many people have written me disappointed reviews so I have decided to split this story up into two parts.

I will keep chp 1-28 in the first half and 29-48 in the second half. So you can keep/favorite the first half that everyone seems to like/love and choose whether or not you want to keep the second part or lose it.

Hopefully this will help.

If you want the second half of this story look on my channel. I titled the second part Sequel to The Escort. I will try to post the rest of the chapters as soon as I can.


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